Armed and Dangerous Attack Dolphins set loose in the Gulf

[IChing]

Edited for unnecessary paste

Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina

by Mark Townsend Houston
Sunday September 25, 2005
The Observer

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.
Experts who have studied the US navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The US navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing.

Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the US defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly. >>>>snip


http://observer.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,6903,1577753,00.html

[Coventina]

1. This is just so wrong on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin

:mad:

:puke:

:banghead:

[Akoto]

2. Indeed.

As many terrible things as there are in the world, training something as gentle as a dolphin to be an assassin ranks pretty high on the list.

[The Traveler]

5. This is just too weird

And as Bluto said, "When the going gets weird, the weird get going." Jeeze.

[IntiRaymi]

22. The Late, Great Hunter S. Thompson is the source of that:

When the going gets weird, the weird turn Pro.
:D

[The Traveler]

49. So that's

who he stole that line from. I shoulda known! B-)

[IChing]

8. Dolphins exploited for military purposes(from Whale and Dolphin Conser.)

It was revealed in March that military dolphins are being used to detect mines near the Iraqi port of Umm Qasr. WDCS is very concerned that these dolphins could come to harm and that this is not the appropriate use of a highly intelligent and social animal.

Dolphins have been used by the military mainly since the cold war, due to their extraordinary capabilities and use of echolocation. The dolphins used in Iraq are reported to form part of a wider unit of dolphins and sea lions that have been trained by the US to detect mines and even enemy divers.

Military dolphins are confined in captivity, which can cause them extreme mental and physical stress. This suffering has been revealed in dolphins kept in marine parks and dolphinariums through aggression, lower life expectancy and higher infant mortality than in the wild.

The US-Navy are reported to have trained dolphins to patrol harbours to report any unusual occurrences to their trainers, to detect and mark objects such as mines and probably to plant mines on ships. It is also assumed, although denied by the Navy itself, that dolphins have been trained to attack foreign divers and kill them. This could be practiced for example by placing equipment over the animals head with a carbonic acid bullet linked to an injection needle which is released when the diver comes into contact with the dolphins beak.

http://www.wdcs.org/dan/publishing.nsf/allweb/B84336D57E281EB580256D0300464287

[I Have A Dream]

30. Actually, dolphins aren't always gentle.

It's my understanding that dolphins sometimes kill for fun and the males sometimes gang rape females.

[The Doctor.]

32. Yes, they also

Gang-rape other males.

[I Have A Dream]

34. There have even been accounts of male dolphins getting very...

sexually aggressive with humans (both male & females). They often advise divers who are going to interact with dolphins to wear wetsuits rather than just bathing suits because the bathing suits aren't enough protection to keep the dolphins away from their target.

[The Doctor.]

39. So much horror... and all because of gay marriage! nt

[SeiowMao]

45. Guess What?

The sexual assaults on swimmers with Dolphins occurs in enclosed tanks. This is NOT normal behavior. These wonderful creatures should not be locked in the Sea World prison.

[I Have A Dream]

47. I tried to find the link but couldn't, but I previously found a news...

item about a dolphin that was trying to have sex with humans on a UK beach while the humans were swimming in the water. I can't find it now. I don't know whether it was true, but it looked like a legitimate news source. I really wish that I could find it now.

[TheWraith]

73. In fairness, there are humans who would have taken the dolphin up on it.

Every species has its oddballs.

[ElectroPrincess]

62. Whoa!

I could have lived my whole life as enriched withOUT know that!?!

Oh Flipper! Who da thunk it. :crazy: :wtf:

[henslee]

44. I hear the dolphins volunteered.

[northzax]

53. you know why they are so easy to train for this?

dolphins will gang up on a larger predator and bludgeon it to death with their noses. They are only gentle to us because we aren't in their food chain, at least not unless we're in large vessels. no natural creatures are 'gentle' evolution has taken it out of them.

[TheWraith]

72. Dolphins aren't entirely gentle.

They are after all predators, and in groups they will sometimes hunt down and kill sharks that have violated the dolphins' territorial waters. I'm not defending the idea of giving them projectile weapons--which seems like a bad idea even just from a Darwinian point of view--but they're not quite big kittens of the sea. They're nice to us because we are, for the most part, nice to them, because we don't compete for territory, and because we have lots of fish.

[IChing]

3. I almost thought it came from the onion when I found it.

What a great military we have, Village people anyone?

In the navy
Yes, you can sail the seven seas
In the navy
Yes, you can put your mind at ease
In the navy
Come on now, people, make a stand
In the navy, in the navy
Can't you see we need a hand
In the navy
Come on, protect the motherland
In the navy
Come on and join your fellow man
In the navy
Come on people, and make a stand
In the navy, in the navy, in the navy (in the navy)

They want you, they want you
They want you as a new recruit

[Up2Late]

15. You took the words right out of my mouth

I have nothing to add, see above.

[Daphne08]

36. Just when I thought I could not become any more outraged

than I already am... I read this!

I have no words.

[genieroze]

4. I thought this was a joke at first.

[acmejack]

6. Posted at 0937, sorry this is not LBN!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x4879286

[muriel_volestrangler]

13. That's in General Discussion

A post there doesn't count as making this a dupe.

[acmejack]

18. Doesn't that sound somewhat inane to you?

Consider that, I don't give a F either way. It just sounds ridiculous when one considers what is being said.

But I suppose I must be "technically" incorrect, so I'm sorry if I upset you by making "false" statements. Mea Culpa duly issued.

[muriel_volestrangler]

20. Inane? Your post or mine?

Probably both, but since you seemed to think the OP shouldn't be in LBN, and it worried you enough to make a post, I just thought I'd let you know what the normal process is on DU. No need for a 'mea culpa'. You just didn't know.

[IChing]

23. the mods can handle this and do, thanks anyway board nanny(aka acmejack)

By the way mods, what happen to the rss feed on LBN? I can't seem to get the thing to work.
you can send me a note on mail thanks.

[Straight Shooter]

7. Well, the military has sent dogs out with bombs to destroy targets.

Since when has the military ever expressed compassion for anything that doesn't have superior brute force? Never.

[Enraged_Ape]

9. This could be the plot from a '70s political action thriller

Oh, wait, it WAS!!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069946/

[HeeBGBz]

10. Rambo Flipper at large

Great. Now we've pissed off the dolphins. It takes a lot to piss off a dolphin.

[slaveplanet]

11. I wonder if It takes 250,000 rounds

for the dolphins to register 1 Kill like it does for our soldiers in Iraq?

wonder what the cost is for this Dr Strangelove program?

[Pithy Cherub]

12. Gives Brand New meaning to NO SWIMMING signs on the Gulf!

:wtf:! We have trained dolphins to kill - does the military think they are part of a Hollywood movie studio... :hide: It's what we don't know that's really statring to terrify me. :scared:

[IChing]

14. It also "Gives Brand New meaning to SUPPORT OUR TROOPS"

You can read up on Dolphins and Whale Conservatory on my link posted in this thread

[Divernan]

16. I've had dolphins approach me while snorkeling & diving

Next to sharks, they are the most awesome, amazing, powerful creatures in the sea. And of course they are far more intelligent and trainable than sharks. (Thank God sharks cannot be trained, or our govt. would be using them as weapons too.) Dolphins can come straight toward you at 30 mph and turn and stop while less than a yard away. If one was trained to attack a diver, there's no way divers could protect themselves.
I have read stories of captive male dolphins being very aggressive toward male divers (and amorous toward female divers) in the staged "dolphin encounters". There's no reason they would stay in the Gulf and they could easily proceed to the Caribbean. If their training area was in the path of a hurricane, it's a no-brainer that they should have been "disarmed" of any weapons. Between this training program and the navy's sonar testing which causes whales and dolphins to beach themselves, the Navy is no lover of sea creatures.

[Captain Hilts]

19. They get amourous to male divers too. Don't think you're safe. nt

[OKthatsIT]

24. I'm worried that HAARP frequencies are destroying wildlife

Video: HAARP - Holes In Heaven?
Documentary features the authors who wrote the HAARP book Angels Don't Play this HAARP: Advances in Tesla Technology, and interviews biologists, ecologists, and HAARP technologists in Alaska directly associated with the project and its patents...

see video: http://www.indybay.org/uploads/haarp-advanced_tesla_technology.ram
(wait 3-5 min for download)

[havocmom]

25. The fact that the navy did NOT disarm the dolphins with hurricanes coming

pretty well answers the question about which species is actually more intelligent!

Like the joke says, dolphins do not hold humans captive, teach them tricks and then pay to see it!

[lakemonster11]

17. So long and thanks for all the fish!

[Peace Patriot]

21. I think it's time we let the dolphins vote, and I am not kidding.

How do you suppose they would vote on the Iraq war?

How do you suppose they would vote on environmental pollution?

How do you suppose they would vote on global warming?

How do you suppose they would vote on George Bush and his circus of jackals, sharks and animal trainers?

Flippers down, all over the earth.

Do the crimes of our mass murdering, thieving government know no end?

Flippers down on us, I'm afraid. We've blown it.

We're even destroying the ocean fisheries. So there will be nothing for them to thank us for, at all.

But, you know, there has to be some reason that they bother with us. If I were them, I'd gather the tribe as far away as we could get from any humans, and hide out and pretend to be extinct. They don't, though. They voluntarily seek us out. Why?

[dooner]

40. Maybe we only meet the Freeper-type dolphins

The cool ones stay far away.

[donheld]

26. How does Flipper know who is a terrorist?

:shrug:

[robre]

29. I assume most people don't go diving in major shipping lanes (nt)

[proReality]

58. Many marine biologists do...

there is a large group of them studying the Dead Zone.

[dooner]

41. FREEDOM ISN"T FREE!! (Don't ask such logical questions) n/t

[K-W]

69. I think the main point is to protect military vessals.

Remember, to them terrorist means whomever we attack next.

But you are right, they couldnt possibly use them near our coast, there would be too much risk to americans.

[Dem2theMax]

27. Sounds like it's time for * and his gang to go on another vacation.

This time, might I suggest a little trip to the Gulf of Mexico?
:evilgrin:

[slay]

28. WTF?!?!

It's bad enough that we pollute their water and kill them in our fishing nets, but to train dolphins to fight... terrorists?!?! When will this madness end? :(

[IChing]

33. The US just created new Osama bin Ladens like we did in Afghanistan

who will train new recruits to attack us at home. The new terrorist group goes by the the acronym Cetacea . Since they do use language and are a highly social group who knows?????

[bananas]

51. There are nuclear weapons lost at sea

If the cetaceans find them, they can use them against us!

[Turn CO Blue]

31. This is surreal. I don't even know if I can believe it. n/t

[PaulaFarrell]

35. Is it April 1st already? n/t

[The Stranger]

37. Apparently, the dolphins are smarter than their trainers.

If the process of training dolphins to kill people does not constitute terrorism, by what name shall we call it?

[crispini]

38. What. The. Fuck?

Is this REAL? This is INSANE!

[oneighty]

42. SCUBA Gear for Dolphins

I worked in the engineering department of a company which manufactured sophisticated diving gear for the Navy. We were asked if we could possibly make diving gear for Dolphins.

An interesting idea. I wonder if it went anywhere.

My outfit in the Navy (EOD) uses Porpoise/Dolphin. They did not when I was in service. Then they were working with seals.

180

[Zorro]

43. So that's why Steven Segal was in New Orleans

He's gonna lead some dolphin commandos against some evil oil rig owners.

[astroBspacedog]

46. Has the NRA Made a Comment on This?

I'm sure these dolphins have a right to bare arms.
(or at least flippers)

[QC]

54. When dolphins are outlawed, only outlaws will have dolphins! n/t

[Elidor]

48. This is utter bullshit

Not the part about the military working with dolphins, but the supposition that the dolphins were all "armed" while waiting for the storm to hit. "Oh, no! A hurricane! Quick! Affix the dart guns to the dolphins immediately!"

The Observer isn't usually this credulous.

Obviously, the military wants them back. But this stuff about armed dolphins terrorizing divers...kee-rist. Humans never cease to amaze me with our capacity for sheer stupidity.

[NoodleyAppendage]

50. What's next? Heat-seeking Doves? Bubonic plague-infected Kitties?

Love the soldiers, but I HATE THE MILITARY. The US military is an excuse for seriously fucked up sociopathic behavior and ideals.

B

[MarsThe Cat]

57. heat-seeking doves are OLD news-

http://historywired.si.edu/object.cfm?ID=353

Nose Cone, Pigeon-Guided Missile
1944

From Pavlov's dogs to Skinner's pigeons
This experimental device was developed during World War II by behavioral psychologist B.F. Skinner, who experimented with harnessing pigeons' pecking movements to steer missiles. Skinner divided this nose cone into three compartments, and proposed strapping a pigeon in each one. As a bomb headed towards earth, each pigeon would see the target on its screen. By pecking at the image, the birds would activate a guidance system that would keep the bomb on the right path until impact. Skinner's idea received initial support, but the U.S. military finally dismissed it as impractical.

Notes
One Skinner-trained bird pecked at an image more than 10,000 times in 45 minutes.


Detail of the three screens of the nose cone. A pigeon was behind each screen.

[NoodleyAppendage]

71. Bizarre! Something they didn't teach in Psych 101...

I knew Skinner was a cold-heated dick, but not so sociopathic as to train disposable bombing pidgeons.

Thanks for the education.

B

[athenap]

59. Sharks. With frickin' laser beams on their heads.

/dr.evil

[MasonJar]

52. This is total crap; is there nothing sacred to these monsters. It

is criminal to involve the wonderful world of dolphins in the insanity. It is time for heads (very plural) to roll. It is time for ads in the newspaper about these atroocities. I'll gladly contribute.

[Psephos]

55. Armed? Riiiightt Dangerous? Ooooookkkkkkkaaaaayyy

I'll bet that just before the hurricane hit the dolphins were summoned and fitted with their dart gun harnesses and given two extra clips of ammo to get them through the mayhem. Yep, that would be the first thing I would do if I was in charge of them. That, and give 'em a cyanide capsule to bite down on in case of capture by Al Qaeda.

Look, as foolish as this whole military-dolphin project is, it takes a REAL fool to think a pack of ninja dolphins is prowling the Gulf right now, "armed and dangerous." Try scared and hungry, at worst - although, more likely, they're hanging as a group in a sheltered cove.

Must have been a slow day at The Observer for them to have to manufacture a story from this thin gruel. If you want a lot of people to laugh at you, continue to spread this story.

Peace.

[Freedomfried]

56. I've been hit by one of these "attack" dolphins before

When I was with SEAL Team in Coronado, we uses to do diver ship attacks on the vessels docked over at the 32nd street naval base.
The boys at the mammals pen used to let them loose on us.
For training they didn't have the anti-swimmer apparatus that they would normally have for wartime, but they would sure come out of the darkness and ram the shit out of you with their snout.
I got hit by a glancing blow by one before, I was aware the animal was in the area, but I was hugging the Pier pilings to keep him from getting a clear shot at me, but I've had my dive buddy get nailed so hard they had to pull up on the safety boat, spitting blood and refusing to get back into the water again.

Freedomfried did 8 years as a UDT/SEAL combat swimmer. That was enough for me.

[NYC]

60. So what do you think of this newspaper article?

Since you have some experience with the trained dolphins.

[Freedomfried]

63. Its pretty silly...

No need to worry about assassin dolphins yet.

[NYC]

67. But even "unarmed"

wouldn't/couldn't the dolphins attack people? You described your companion as bleeding from the attack.

[NuttyFluffers]

61. i'm sorry, but my humor meter just blew a fuse....

just like cartman in south park and the family that had asses for faces.

i'm gonna go away now. :hide:

[Roland99]

64. The Day of the Dolphin

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0069946/

[LiveWire]

65. I guess its better than sea bass

with friggin laser beams on their heads. God damn endangered species act.

[kurtyboy]

66. Ill-tempered sea-bass,

at that...

[54anickel]

68. Great movie plot - Planet of the dolphins? "Planet's smartest" armed

just before global warming flood the entire planet. A combination of Planet of the Apes and Water World. :crazy:

[K-W]

70. Yah perhaps we shouldnt arm other intellgent species. EOM