Socks With Explosive Residue Discovered

[Khephra]

Socks With Explosive Residue Discovered
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Published: December 5, 2003


Filed at 8:28 p.m. ET

WASHINGTON (AP) -- The discovery of a pair of stretched-out socks with traces of explosives in them has prompted a government warning that al-Qaida may still be planning to use personal items to blow up a plane, according to the Homeland Security Department.

The bulletin was issued Wednesday to state and local officials, as well as federal transportation officials, said Homeland Security Department spokesman Brian Roehrkasse.

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/national/AP-Terror-Warning.html

[Wwagsthedog]

1. And I thought you meant Clinton's cat

nt

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

Damn! You stole my line... Now their blaming Clinton's cat. n/t

[Maple]

2. Exploding socks?

Sounds like an episode involving Maxwell Smart and 99.

[shockingelk]

7. LOL n/t

[izzie]

11. It does at that. Bush will save us from the socks now.

Will we have knee high warnings?

[notadmblnd]

22. yea.. thats the ticket..

we can have various threat levels of socks..

anklet level.. no threat

mid calf... chatter from the terrorists

knee high... public threat

thigh high (most dangerous level)... sock explosion eminent

[burrowowl]

3. Will

that blow the socks off you?

[arcane1]

4. ok, I have a stupid, moronic, totally asinine question..

why wouldn't al Qaeda still use personal items to commit terrorism? Did they all stop their training in whatever-the-hell, and learn combat instead, and take the earliest plane to Iraq?

that's what they would have us believe all this time, I guess...

still, nice to have a reminder now & then. :)

hey Bush, what have you done for me lately?

[Fleshdancer]

5. What an odd article

Why does the journalist even bother reporting stuff like this if no one is willing to tell the public what the hell is going on? I read the article three times because I thought I was missing something. They won't tell us where or when...what exactly are we suppose to do with this information? Start fearing socks?

And the agencies wonder why we don't trust them.

Oh wait, silly me. Bush's poll numbers are down. :think:

[amazona]

9. cue the twilight zone theme

...beware the evil slithering exploding socks of England!

P.S. I think it is silly. They are just looking for tiny traces of chemical to build a case against this guy, and probably the socks were the only thing they tested that came up positive in the lab. Who knows if there was really ever any explosive or maybe it was drugs or some other chemical. Who the heck knows. Maybe it's even a false positive.

I am not going to stay awake nights fearing socks.

[notadmblnd]

23. later that week...

... after further analysis of the suspected socl bombers socks, it has been discovered that the residue thought to be explosives is just an unusually large amount dried sweat.

[Philostopher]

10. The journalist bothers reporting stuff like this

because (shhhhh!) the turkey photo-op fizzled. People (including reporters, the nerve of them to be pissed off because they weren't in on the photo op!) have the nerve to pay more attention to the fact that the centerpiece photo from the 'wham-bam-thank-you-baghdad' photo op was a fake than how brave and masterful our fearless leader looked.

You see, it's all part of 'Plan Rove.' Rememeber -- failed photo op, or failed PR stunt, then either some celebrity (cf Jacko) gets arrested for something he's been doing for ten years, or else the terralert system goes into overdrive because they found something really threatening like ... oh, I don't know, let's say some ... iffy socks.

Because their iffy potential terraist in Chicago turned out to be a dud who didn't actually know the least little bit about dirty bombs. But everybody knows about socks, right? Could be your neighbor who doesn't have a flag out 24/7. Look at him next time he gets in his car to go to work -- he's wearing socks, right? See, we told you. Buy duct tape!

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER ABOUT THIS POST

I'm sorry, folks, I know this probably sounds too cynical -- in my brain, I know it's probably more serious than I make it out to be, I don't mean to insinuate there might not be a terrorist threat level -- but sometimes it all just seems like a big fucking Monopoly game, or some performance art piece by some anarchist theater company. Sometimes, I grow weary of the failed photo ops and terralerts, as I know many of the rest of you do.

(edited -- didn't open a set of quotes, damn my hide)

[hang a left]

6. Yeah, right, whatever, liars.

[goforit]

8. Does this have anything to do with the shoe bomber who lost his sock?

LOL!!!!

Next we'll have the boot bomber and then the Leggs pantyhose bomber,
then........well I'll stop while I'm ahead.

[0007]

12. Wow! traces of explosives on a pair socks.

What am I missing here? I don't get it, what the fuck are they or who ever come up with this crap.

I do feel much safer that the government has things under control, but a pair of socks?? Are these guys allowed to carry guns?

[Soopercali]

13. I can picture it now...

When you fly, you'll have to check your shoes and socks, like you do at a roller rink.

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

14. At the end of a long day, my socks might be considered WMD... n/t

[karlschneider]

15. A predictable response: Socks and awe.

:eyes:

[Snazzy]

16. Yeah, but would you still fly if you had to...

submit to a random butt check?

Headed that way, isn't it?

[cosmicaug]

17. So someone who's thought to be a terrorist...

So someone who's thought to be a terrorist, might have been around explosives? What will they think of next? Firearms? Box cutters? Flying planes into buildings?

[cosmicaug]

18. Implications are staggering

The implications are staggering, they might have caught an actual terrorist!

[Old and In the Way]

25. Profiling Socks?

Doh, we have a US military, right? Soldiers wear socks....any chance that they might be the perps?

[Field Of Dreams]

19. I'm impressed somebody found two socks together...

I can't find the mates for most of mine.

[DeathvadeR]

20. Jesus Freegan Christo!!!!

Iv'e ofton wondered if the shoe bomber would have tried to smuggle explosives in his ass, Would they now require an ass probe before you get on any plane?

[Melsky]

21. Aren't fertilizer chemicals used in explosives?

Maybe this person got it on their socks that way.

[RenoUnd]

34. excuse

So a man with ties to Richard Reid is found with explosive residue, and the first thing you can think of is an excuse?

[Kool Kitty]

24. And this type of report just brings out the

practical joker side of my husband, seeing as he heard this on the way home from work tonight. I have been finding socks everywhere-refrigerator, between the couch cushions, hanging off the Christmas tree, even in the birdseed bin. I didn't know about the report and each time I found a sock, he would start screaming, "Duck, it's a bomb! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!" Then he finally told me what the real story was, and until I heard it on the news, I still thought it was just him acting nuts after it took him five hours to get home from Newark in the snow. (A trip that usually takes 45 minutes to an hour on a good day.)

[NickB79]

26. Hell, my socks would probably register having explosive residue

I like to shoot, and to save money I reload my own ammunition. To do this, I have gunpowder around my place. Any traces of that gunpowder on my clothes would probably trip the sensors if I were to be checked at an airport before boarding a plane. Seriously, what kind of damage could you pack into a pair of socks, even if you soaked the things in nitroglycerine?

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

27. "Helo, 911"

caller: Yes I'm at the corner of 33rd and 3rd.
operator: And the emergency?
caller: I'd like to report an argyle sock...

[elvisbear]

28. Terrorist sock finally identified.

Sent to Gitmo where he will be forced into the wash along with all the red clothes. ;)

[DoNotRefill]

29. I once got stopped for having "explosive residue" on me....

Seems that I watered my plants with Peter's Special plant food before leaving on a trip. The residue of the ammonium nitrate in the plant food set off the airport detectors.

I guess I'm lucky I didn't end up in prison...

[RBHam]

30. The Department Of Misinformation informs all citizens

That it is your duty to be misinformed as in being misinformed you will become better voters and make this country stronger.

The Department Of Disinformation informs all citizens
That it is your duty top be disinformed as in being disinformed you will become better psychologically equipped to win the War On Terror which will take at least 3 years, or perhaps a lifetime or more.
Or until the oil runs out.

[radfringe]

31. Underpants with Explosive GAS Discovered

CRAWFORD TX (WHTD -White House Terror Department) -- Homeland Security Forces detained a passenger attempting to board a Southwest Flight when the explosive test came back POSITIVE.

A search of the passenger revealed that his underwear contained traces of a gaseous residue. Lawyers for the passenger state that the passenger had consumed several bowls of chili before leaving for the airport.

:evilgrin:

[Buns_of_Fire]

32. Methane gas is also explosive

Therefore, all passengers will henceforth be held in quarantine for a period of ten hours before any flight. After all, one good helping of black beans and rice could clear out the first class section almost immediately. (And why do they still allow people to carry cigarette lighters and matches in their pockets, if they're that concerned? What're you going to smoke?)

We at Nekkid Airlines have been researching this problem, and we have decided to stop anyone who has a cannon fuse hanging out their butt. And in response to the possibility of Socks of Mass Destruction, we are requiring all passengers to jump up and down three times. If they don't explode, they're OK.

Nekkid Airlines -- We Have Nothing To Hide!

[Throckmorton]

33. I always wondered what happened to Socks the Cat,

That bastard Karl Rove had him wired with expolsives, golly, their hatred of the Big Dog knows now limits.