US VP Cheney to have heart defibrillator replaced

[sabra]

Source: Reuters

WASHINGTON, June 8 (Reuters) - U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney, a survivor of four heart attacks, will have his cardiac defibrillator replaced later this year, his office said on Friday after he had his annual physical checkup.

"The ICD (implanted cardioverter defibrillator) battery has reached the level where elective replacement of the device is indicated over the summer," his deputy press secretary Megan McGinn said in a statement.

"This will be scheduled at a time convenient for the vice president," she said.

Cheney, 66, had his most recent heart attack, which was considered mild, shortly after the November 2000 election. He had the defibrillator implanted in his chest in 2001 to help regulate his heartbeat.

Read more: http://www.alertnet.org/thenews/newsdesk/N08337150.htm

[MNDemNY]

1. Complications, PLEASE!!!!!!!!

[aquart]

34. I looked, and the mortality rate is bare 3 percent. Pfui.

Not to mention the unlikelihood of Cheney contracting a staph infection or flesh-eating bacteria like the rest of us would get.

[MGKrebs]

40. That guy is an infection.

[Demeter]

52. Why Does He Need a New Battery? Defibrillator Working Overtime?

[soothsayer]

2. Gee, I sure hope nothing goes wrong.

[Kikosexy2]

38. They might as...

well leave it off...He never had a heart to begin with...

[MNDemNY]

3. Maybe they can replace it with 9-volt battery.

[Hand]

31. Preferably one made in China. nt

[silverojo]

49. ^ Post of the day!! LOL!!!!! n/t

[Hand]

62. Thank ya, thank ya very much...

I'm here all week--try the veal and remember to tip yer waitperson!

[medicis]

I'm praying the

surgeon has an ADD moment.

[maddezmom]

4. what is he doing today?

I think today is convenient

[woodsprite]

5. "At a time most convenient for Cheney" - Hmmm, would that be just as the

Capitol Police arrive at his door to take him in to give sworn testimony to Congress?

[whistle]

6. Sorry Dick, all out of heart defibrillator's until December

....we expect a new shipment from China at that time.

[Divine Discontent]

36. amazing he's lasted this long

and I wish not for his death, seriously, but for chinese battery replacement parts...

hey, they're pushing chinese prods on us!

www.cafepress.com/warisprofitable <<-- check it out, top '08 stuff

[whistle]

48. Cheney gets fresh virgin blood every night after the sun sets

[Divine Discontent]

63. and you think you know everything! lol n/t

[Horse with no Name]

7. I hope he has it replaced sooner, rather than later

:dilemma:

[Doctor_J]

8. VP Rudy, pardons for Dick & friends

Nothing ever goes wrong for this bunch.

[Solly Mack]

9. Doctors are only human

[tandot]

10. Isn't a heart defibrillator useless in Cheney's case? I thought you need a heart for that to work.

[Fridays Child]

12. Bingo!

[Rosa Luxemburg]

33. LOL!

probably a metallic robot

[jazzjunkysue]

60. Vampires don't require oxigen, only daily victims.

[katty]

11. darth cheney gets HIS tune-up on time-as troops/Iraqi's are killed

[thereismore]

13. "elective replacement of the device is indicated" Hahaha If you have to do it

it's not elective anymore. Morans. They pussyfoot about Chainey so much it's gagging.

[Ganja Ninja]

14. Breaking News! Dick Cheney has a heart!

Black and shriveled though it may be.

[barb162]

25. He does?

[Ganja Ninja]

28. Who knew?

:shrug:

[Magleetis]

15. Hoping

for the best possible outcome.

[flyarm]

16. what heart?????????????? eom

[Connie_Corleone]

17. I'm sorry to hear this latest news.

[AlinPA]

18. It can be done as an outpatient.

[aquart]

37. That's so deceptive.

Just because you can go home, doesn't mean you're fit for a damn thing for a month.

Been fooled by that once. Never again.

[mzteris]

19. uh -oh -

that means his clone is ready and he'll be decanting into it.

The old body will "die" - he'll escape justice.

His new young body will assume a new identity plus all the fortune squirreled away - and he'll reappear in a few years as an "up and coming" political figure. :eyes:

Our worst nightmare.

[partylessinOhio]

20. Cheney gets replacement parts while many others (like me)

with real heart problems die a slow death without expensive drugs, treatment and surgeries.

That man is healthy as a horse and hell and devil will keep him that way whether we like or not.

[silverojo]

50. I wish I could K&R your post

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. Our so-called health care system sucks to the max! :mad:

[PATRICK]

21. As part of the Friday dump

gates replaces Pace with Cheney searching for his battery recharger coupon. If only we had some real news analysis, but no one even has the imagination to suspect a move might have been made undercutting Cheney.

[kestrel91316]

22. (kestrel praying for the Karma Fairy to intervene.......)

[RL3AO]

23. Will he sign over temporary power to Bush?

[superconnected]

47. rolf rofl rofl rofl...hahahhahaha

[shain from kane]

24. Cheney orders new shotgun.

[Dr.Phool]

26. Replace it with a stake!

Any questions?

[Mend]

29. or Lynne's vibrator...

[liam_laddie]

32. Which I hear...

is two inches long, based on a live measurement of the original.

[LibertyLover]

27. This morning as I walked from the Foggy Bottom Metro station

over to 2121 Pennsylvania Ave where I work, a motorcade passed by on 23rd Street - motorcycle cops, cop cars, black SUVs and 2 black limosines. I didn't pay too much attention - that sort of thing is common enough in DC - but when I got to Penn and 22nd Street, there were more police cars in front of the GW Hospital medical offices building, cops on the sidewalk not letting people pass, not to mention a few people with cameras. Several of us waiting to cross the street got talking and I wondered outloud what scumsucking politician it was this time. One of my fellow waitees replied that it had been Cheney going in for a doctor's appointment and that she had seen him getting out of the limo and walking into the building vvveeerrryy sslooowwwly. Maybe afterwards he stopped in at Foggy Bottom (aka US State Department) to visit with little Lizzie?

[Massachusetts]

30. The dick's days are numbered.

Even pure evil (the dick) can't avoid the inevitable.

[Kablooie]

35. No! Don't do it! It's too dangerous!!

[ryanmuegge]

39. He has a heart?

I need photographic evidence of this.

[cmd]

41. Prediction: Cheney retires due to health

Shrub appoints Mitt Romney who they hope will charm the ladies and become the next shrublet.

[krispos42]

43. Or Jeb Bush... n/t

[krispos42]

42. Don't put the battery in backwards!

That might be, um....

I'm going to say 'tragic' :evilgrin:

[kikiek]

44. Proof he does indeed have a heart. It is a soul he is lacking.

[eringer]

45. Perfect Timing!!!!

Poor Cheney will no longer be able to perform as VP and must step down. Enter the new VP--Bush's choice for President in 2008--his bro, Jeb Bush.
Ahh...all is right in the world again.
JEB08

[superconnected]

46. Hope he dies.

[Ian David]

51. Does anyone really believe Dick Cheney has a HEART?

[dkofos]

53. OK god, (if you are real) this is your chance!!

[Az_lefty]

54. maybe toss in a clove or two of garlic...

that'll liven up the old vampire.

[Hekate]

55. Who knew that chunk of ice could hook up to a defibrillator? nt

[billyoc]

56. Get well soon, Mr. Vice President.

Your countless victims can wait a little while longer for their reunion with you.

All of the soldiers that you betrayed and sent to their deaths,
the parents who had to watch their children die and vice versa,
the people who never lived long enough to know what it is to hold a grandchild as you have.

All of them.

They'll be waiting for you in the place we all go to in the end.

When you're lying in your bed, alone at the end of your days, you will realize
that you never could have lived long enough to spend all of the money you made
from the deaths of all of those people. Perhaps you'll think of them as you
lie there feeling your life ebb away. Perhaps not. Perhaps they'll all have
forgotten about you by then.

Perhaps not.

Get well soon, Mr. Vice President.

[IndianaGreen]

57. I hope and pray he dies and joins Jerry Falwell in eternal damnation

Fuck him!

[Viva_La_Revolution]

58. My prediction: He's going to "die" on the table...

and be spotted later in the Carribean sipping umbrella drinks with Ken Lay.

:tinfoilhat:

[Joe Bacon]

59. The truth is that Chandra's heart is rejecting Dick's body!

He's getting what he deserves!

[jazzjunkysue]

61. Looks like the Vader 2008 Model has been released for testing.

Gotta upgrade the prosthetics every now and then.

[0007]

64. Perhaps Lynne Cheney will have to quit using Dick's

heart battery for her new dildos

[Buns_of_Fire]

65. I sure hope they wire the leads correctly

It would be a shame if something got reversed, and, every time it kicked in, he would break into an uncontrollable Macarena accompanied by loud flatulence on his part. Hey, just sayin'.