Miss. school prom off after lesbian's date request

[sabra]

Source: WP/AP

JACKSON, Miss. -- An 18-year-old student says a Mississippi school board that canceled a high school prom did so in retaliation for her request to bring a same-sex date.

The American Civil Liberties Union had demanded that the Itawamba County school district allow senior Constance McMillen to attend with her girlfriend. A school district policy requires that dates be of the opposite sex.

A school board statement Wednesday announced the district wouldn't host the April prom. The district's statement didn't mention McMillen's request but did refer to unspecified recent "distractions."

McMillen tells The Clarion-Ledger of Jackson in Thursday's edition that other students at the school will hate her for the board's decision and called it retaliation.

Read more: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/11/AR2010031101201.html

[LynzM]

1. "Homophobic asshat school board cancels prom because lesbians want to go."

What. TheFuck. Sorry, that's not anything resembling reasoned debate, but this is beyond ridiculous.

"after taking into consideration the education, safety and well being of our students" == After reviewing our homophobia, we've decided to perpetuate it.

:grr:

[donco6]

4. The school board does not necessarily equate to "educators".

We have some real whackjobs on school boards out here. The district is utterly at their mercy.

[LynzM]

8. Ok, good and valid point. I will edit.

Thanks for pointing that out. I was a little too frustrated and angry to think through the whole statement.

[AlecBGreen]

9. makes you want to bang your head on the wall doesnt it?

how ignorant and assholish can people get? "hi we're gonna cancel prom cause a couple of teh gayz wanna dance too."

[LynzM]

12. Yes. I just Do. Not. Get it.

What is so threatening about it? What's so scary? :banghead: People joke with the "omg I might catch teh gay"... but I think some people must somehow either think like that, or be so disgusted (by people loving each other?)... ugh.

[Thor_MN]

46. Intolerance.

I don't know what makes some people need to put others down, probably a mechanism to prop up their own image. They are going to find an outlet for it. It does make me wonder what avenue these asshats are going to go down next as we make progress in social norms. It will take generations, but we are making progress in removing inequalities based on sex, skin color, ethnic background and orientation. I just wonder what the haters of our greatgranchildren's generation will focus on, as social acceptance removes targets from them.

[TeddCatt]

78. Too close to home

This article was painful for me to read.

My sister was molested for years by our uncle when she was a little girl. When she became a young woman, she found herself unable to have a romantic relationship with a man. She went to her HS prom by herself.

She had several female relationships in college, but ultimately never felt fulfilled emotionally.

After 2 years of counseling she came to realize that not all men are selfish and sexual predators. Thankfully she found a gentle caring man that she is now happily married to. She refers to her lesbian relationships in college as an "escape", and says she would never go back to that life. Going to the prom solo was hurtful, but just water under the bridge to her now.

My family and I never stopped loving and supporting her through her emotional journey, and are thrilled that she is so settled and content.

[donco6]

33. Well, and it's just a guess on my part, too.

There are some whackjob school admins out there, too. So . . . who knows? But on the whole, I'd say the school boards are whackjobby-er. :-)

[sakabatou]

17. That should be the real title of the story.

[LynzM]

23. Yeah, that was my thought!

That's how I reposted it a couple places, anyway...

[yava]

39. Is it not possible to go to the prom alone and then join up?

If both girls are graduating, why couldn't the two girls go separately and join up later like I think many gay guys do?
Two gay boys or straight friends also could have taken the girls and themselves there.
So, it is not the issue of access to the building. Its a militant statement.
Why do they sabotage other kids' dreams for public recognition of gay rights.
There are minors at graduation and the parents have their say.
Lesbianism has been going on for a long time but to turn the prom into a legal battle and hurt feelings is a cruel and vindictive act. It will backfire on gay rights.

[dmr]

45. Why must it be a militant statement?

Why can't she be treated just like other kids who look forward to dressing up and going to the prom with their dream date?

Why must the onus be on her? Why do you say the girl is sabotaging the other kids? The adults in the district, and most likely their churches, owns that.

Why do you say the girl is causing a cruel and vindictive act? All she wants is to go to the prom with her date. The question is why are the adults so cruel and vindictive?

You say this will backfire on gay rights. Now, that is laughable because anything gay will backfire when it comes to ignorant bigots. Ignorant bigots can't even hold their noses and pretend tolerance.

If the 2 teens entered at separate times to 'run' into one another at the prom, as you suggest, which chaperon's head do you think would explode first once the girls slow dance? Or should they sit that out not to make a scene and ruin it for everyone else?

Look, I'm an old lady. One thing I've learned in life, is that you pre-judge others at your own peril. We all yearn for fairness, recognition, respect, and privacy, and we all should strive to give the same to others.

Too bad the other kids don't come to her defense, like the students in Virgina last week.

[No Elephants]

49. B U L L S H I T.

Why weren't African Americans content to drink out of the fountain labeled "Colored?" After all, it wasn't as though they were being denied access to water. And their refusal hurt civil rights in the long run.

Also B U L L S H I T.

All humans are entitled to equal rights. I am very, very sorry for you, that you don't seem to get that. I pray you will someday.

[activa8tr]

66. There were stories a year or so ago about STILL SEGREGATED proms

at some schools in GA. I kid you not!!!

Some film maker had a film made about this.... I'll try and dig it up.


http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/24/magazine/24prom-t.html

[bitchkitty]

80. How the fuck did they sabotage anything?

The whacked out right wing Christians on the school board sabotaged the prom, honey.

[iris27]

82. Both girls AREN'T graduating - her girlfriend is a sophomore. Like proms everywhere,

underclassmen can't attend unless they're the date of an older student. Yes, they could try to find a guy willing to "take" the younger girl but what if they can't?...and why should they have to? There's nothing militant or vindictive about this. Shut the fuck up.

[darkstar3]

86. "Why do they sabotage other kids' dreams for public recognition of gay rights."

Thank you for responding in exactly the way the school board wanted. :sarcasm:

The asses of the school board want desperately for the blame of this cancelled prom to land on the shoulders of the victim, and you've successfully played into their desires.

As for your claim that this is a "militant statement", all I can say is "holy fucking shit." It couldn't be that she just wants to be treated like everyone else and be able to bring her chosen date to the prom, oh no, the fact that she's different but wishes to be treated equally is a "militant statement." Damn.

[LynzM]

2. Another link - HuffPo article

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/11/mississippi-prom-canceled_n_494555.html

[TexasProgresive]

3. Is she going to get police protection?

Those fellow students that are homophobic will take it out on her.

[iris27]

83. Poor kid is already getting shit from students over the school's

decision to take their ball and go home. "Thanks for ruining my senior year." Assholes.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_lesbian_prom_date

[Dont_Bogart_the_Pretzel]

5. I always wonder what these "people" are scared of

How long has this been in the books? "A school district policy requires that dates be of the opposite sex"

[No Elephants]

53. Like "opposite marriage." Teh stupid, it burns.

[Leftist Agitator]

6. "We can't out law homosexuality..."

"But if you're gay, we're just going to make your life as difficult and uncomfortable as possible!"

[Botany]

7. Teaching the students to hate other people

Class of a rats ass

[WriteDown]

10. Sounds like its time for a private prom. nt

[WatchWhatISay]

25. These are adults now, they can put on their own prom rather than

be blackmailed one last time.

[WriteDown]

27. Just don't let anybody catch them drinking!

They are adults, just not adult-adults. :eyes:

[No Elephants]

51. Yeah. A gay kid or two per graduating class per public school can put on his or her own prom.

That would made everything equal, now, wouldn't it? Separate but equal is always equal, isn't it?

Oh, wait.

[WriteDown]

54. Didn't have your coffee yet?

A private prom inviting all students.

[No Elephants]

58. Did you?

If a class were willing to invite all students (and treat them equally), there would be no point to a private prom. The issue would not even arise.

Besides, when bigotry is the issue, the point of going private is never to give the minority being discriminated against equal rights with the majority. It's to get out from under the requirements of the Constitution, which applies to government, but not to private persons hosting private function.

P.S. Separate proms for and by African Americans is not odd at all. It's a logical outcome of discrimination and Jim Crow, which forced African Americans to have their own this, that or the other, or go without. Same thing will Mardi Gras balls in the South.

[WriteDown]

59. If if's and buts were candy and nuts, we’d all have a merry Christmas

Hopefully, this is an opportunity for the student body to come together and show what prom is all about. Alcohol, clumsy groping, and teenage pregancy, J/K.

[No Elephants]

63. That cliche does not apply to anything I posted. Thanks for sharing, though.

[WriteDown]

64. "If" you say so.

"If a class were willing to invite all students...."

[bitchkitty]

81. You forgot pot. n/t

[Sgent]

69. Not gonna happen

private proms in that area of the country means no blacks... and I can't imagine gays would be on the invite list either.

[iris27]

84. WriteDown...you mean like THIS private prom that invites all students?

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/24/magazine/24prom-t.html

Funny how only the black students come...

[No Elephants]

50. Same thing racists said when schools integrated.

[WriteDown]

55. So there were no proms during desegregation?

Oddly enough, the trend today is to have Black private proms.

[No Elephants]

56. "there were no proms during desegregation" What are you talking about?

We've had desegregation of public schools for decades. Of course there have been proms during that time.

My post says onoe of the racist reactions to desegration was private proms--private schools, too, for that matter. What's your point?

[WriteDown]

57. Well if you're a private school, I'd imagine you'd have a private prom...

My point is that the prom isn't going to happen so the kids have to get together and throw their own all-inclusive prom.

[No Elephants]

60. Argghhh. That, too, is not what I said. I said private proms were one of the

reactions racists had to integration of public schools--and private schools were another reaction. I was not saying private schools would not have private proms. Duh.

Some kids from that graduating class probably will have a private event of some kind, but I very much doubt it will be all inclusive.

[WriteDown]

62. You are very confusing.

I am obviously advocating an all-inclusive prom.

[No Elephants]

65. Already answered, so I won't repeat myself.

[iris27]

85. Guess what? The all-inclusive private proms are usually only attended

by those students who are excluded from the "regular" prom. No one else comes. Like those Black private proms you mentioned, "oddly enough".

[Divine Discontent]

11. what homophobic crap and an attack on the kids! way to make the kids improperly mad at this girl.

it's the SCHOOLS fault this happened, they chose to cancel it. Shameful action. They will never be respected by many after this. I hope the students march in support of her and arrange a prom somewhere somehow.

[LisaM]

14. The school board is not the school

The right wing has been packing school boards for years. People need to pay attention to this.

[liquid diamond]

16. March for her?

This is the South.

[Divine Discontent]

18. they hardly are willing to stand up away from the remote & sweet tea, I know... ha

[liquid diamond]

21. That and the place is infested

with bigoted scum.

[Bjorn Against]

31. The place was infested with bigoted scum during the fifties and sixties as well...

That didn't stop people from marching for civil rights back then however, and it shouldn't stop people from marching for civil rights now. In fact the bigoted scum that exists is what gives people a reason to march.

[RedRoses323]

13. If she was my daughter

I would raise hell!!! :mad:

[Richd506]

15. This is really pissing me off

The school district is going to ruin everyone's prom just to get their bigoted message across. Disgusting...

[Divine Discontent]

19. yep - pit the kids against the Gays... really Christian and noble of them. NOT!

they are so far from decent behavior on this that it's laughable. amazing, ain't it? just to get their bigoted message thru, they'll ruin it for everyone.

[Divine Discontent]

20. some famous GLBTer from the state should go down there and raise heck, there's gotta be someone, or

even a friend of GLBT people, who is straight, who would stand up against them, as this is a PERFECT case to go against.

[julian09]

22. They are more into incest than gay.

Maybe she could bring her brother.

[happygoluckytoyou]

24. BROTHER ok.... but not her SISTER.... THAT would be a sin!!!

[chrisa]

26. They're trying to make the students turn on her and hate her.

This is sick and unsurprising, given the blatent bigotry that's still allowed in this country.

[Roland99]

68. And they succeeded

[LuckyLib]

28. Some sensitive and enterprising kids should organize a prom "off site" -- inviting

all school members who want to pay -- rent a space, etc. etc. Just walk around the bigoted adults who pass for "decision-makers" in that community. It would be the best statement they could make. Straight or gay, joining together.

[alp227]

29. ACLU needs to retaliate.

It'd be more noble for those students just to be banned rather than the whole damn class. :sarcasm:

Really, if you still believe in this new decade that homosexuality is a choice, you shouldn't be working in a school board or any other public service position. Go to the library and read up on some psychological studies on homosexuality (by LEGITIMATE psych research orgs, not NARTH or Concerned Women for America or other right-wing Christian apologetics groups that peddle pseudoscience).

And is traditional heterosexual dating so much in danger that a SCHOOL POLICY has to mandate it? Just like all those "persecuted Christians". Haha?

[Name removed]

67. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[alp227]

73. Farm boy...ahh I can understand

I was just about to react angrily but now see..."hay", I guess growing up on a farm contributes big time to the kid's view of the world.

Love with animals has been noted in pop culture too.

In 1998, there was this controversial Jerry Springer Show episode about a man who claimed to have married his horse. Some stations pre-empted the episode.

And you can date your pet in prom if the pet is anthromorphic, like the Family Guy episode "Barely Legal". The Parents Television Council obviously didn't like this episode.

My opinion is that people can live their lives however they want as long as they don't harm others. I think that the school admins should have not dissed the kid for loving his horse but rather raised safety issues, a real compelling issue. You never know what a horse can do on a dance floor, right?

[Veruca Salt]

74. Either I am missing something ENTIRELY in the above or being gay is being compared to bestiality.

Two consenting adults is being compared to sex with an animal that CANNOT consent to anything.

Am I seriously being compared to a HORSE??

[darkstar3]

88. Maybe it was Rick Santorum,

aka Box Turtle man...

[Divine Discontent]

30. way to TEACH the kids its good to discriminate. These people are clearly 19th century bigots.

backwoods morons. they bring shame to the few good people who live there.

I'd HOPE the good kids of the school stand up for the girl and reject the school boards actions.

[marshall]

32. Personally I don't think schools should sponsor any activity like this

The tradition of a dance is for students to pair off. That is full of problems even without the added challenge to the neanderthals of same sex dating. School gatherings should reflect the nature of the school experience, which is meant to educate.

[donco6]

34. But we've had gay couples at our prom for several years.

No one bats an eye. The kids don't give a shit.

What really gets people talking is how many REALLY pregnant girls show up.

[marshall]

35. Or how many girls get pregnant in the after prom

It's a recipe for high jinks.

[donco6]

37. Not with me as a chaperone!

At least . . . not AT prom. Not that they haven't tried . . . sneaky lil buggers that they are.

[AB_Positive]

47. Not to go off topic a bit here but...

wouldn't being a sneaky bugger avoid pregnancy? Just sayin'... :D

To be honest though - this is ridiculous, and having lived in Canada and New England almost all my life, I really can't fathom the bigotry like this. I'm glad I went to a high school where the school board would've fought for these two to hit the prom, not barred the prom all together.


Now, whether schools should have proms either - that is an interesting debate. Not for here though. :D

[donco6]

71. We don't allow that at prom, either.

What they do with their naughty bits when they go home is up to them. :)

[dflprincess]

36. And what about the kids, Gay or straight, who want to go but don't have a date?

100 years ago when I was in school, prom required a "date" (no question then that it would be opposite sex dates) but one year my niece and some of her friends all went together because they didn't have dates and that silly rule no longer existed.

Though, let me make it clear, I'm not suggesting that the Gay kids should have to pretend their partner is just a friend they're going with - I'm just wondering why anyone who wants to go apparently isn't allowed to unless they're "paired off".

[No Elephants]

61. Who says the kids are not allowed to go to prom unless paired off?

[dflprincess]

70. I was guessing that if the young woman had to request to bing a same sex date

there's an assumption that the kids will be attending as "couples". Unless it's one of those deals where two single tickets cost more than if you buy them as a couple.

[iris27]

87. Her girlfriend is a sophomore, and can only attend as the date of

an upperclassman.

[Hepburn]

38. What a load of bullshit.

Call off a prom cuz they don't like someone's date? GMAFB!

[Vidar]

40. Grow up, Mississippi!

[TomCADem]

41. That Was A BS Move By The School Board

Truly dispiscable to retaliate just to accomodate their narrow minded views.

[marasinghe]

42. exactly; as well as a thinly veiled plan to paint a target on this poor kid.

i wouldn't doubt the girl is correct in her assessment. these fucking assholes plotted this thing through in their reptilian minds, into an attempt to manufacture resentment against her in the minds of some neanderthal primitives, upset at losing the opportunity for a hormone-driven teen orgy. in a truly just society, these scum would be in jail - awaiting trial for conspiracy to incite violence against the kid.

[TomCADem]

43. Bingo! Might As Well Pass Out Flyers To The Next Cross Burning

Prom has been canceled and its the fault of this girl and the ACLU. How dare they stand up for the girl's rights?

[saigon68]

48. minds of some neanderthal primitives

Lots of those surfacing lately

[gtar100]

44. People who actually care about other people need to start taking over the school boards.

That would be revolutionary. Instead we get the power-hungry, homophobic, self-righteous types in far too great a number.

[No Elephants]

52. +1 Too many "libertarians" and neo theos got the memo. Where is everyone else?

[EFerrari]

72. **** UPDATE HERE:******

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x7901506

[fujiyama]

75. This is Mississippi

Anyone see the HBO special "Prom Night in Mississippi" by Morgan Freeman? It was about segregated proms in his hometown.

About ten years ago he made an offer to pay for the prom if they decided to desegregate it. The people refused. So he tried again two years ago and finally they agreed, but it wasn't easy and there was still considerable opposition and some white people decided to attend the white prom which was privately held.

So with that kind of mentality, it doesn't surprise me how petty and vindictive these school board members are. What pathetic and nasty behavior. The right has been going after those for years and they have their say in many states, especially the south. They play a major role in textbooks as well so they are trying to shape perception of future generations.

[Honeycombe8]

76. What you DIDN'T say about Morgan Freeman's "Prom Night" documentary.

It was the Af. American kids who wanted their own prom even more so than the white kids. As I recall, I saw the Af. American kids in the show talking about it, saying they liked the white kids, they all got along, etc., etc. But they wanted to have their own special prom, with their closest friends, ...it had always been done that way, and they wanted to keep it that way.

I remember it because I had assumed at the start of the show that it was WHITE kids or the school who wanted the segregation.

Freeman tried to explain to them that segregation, whatever the reason, had a bad history in the country, and it wasn't the thing to do. They got it, they said. And they said they COULD go to a prom with teh white kids, and would if one were held, maybe...as long as they could still have their own African American prom, too.

But yes, this is Mississippi. It seems that the girl asked for this exception to their rule, for an activist reason, knowing full well it would be denied. That automatically sets up the other side to resist it, because it's insincere; it's an activist thing. Activism is good and necessary at times. I'm just sayin'...this is Mississippi. The deep south is usu. a decade or so behind the rest of the country. (I grew up in south La., but not as south as N.O.).

[Paladin]

79. Check Your Calendar---It's The 21st Century.

"Insincere" activism, my ass......

[darkstar3]

89. Check your facts.

She asked to bring this girl because the girl is an underclassman. Underclassmen are not allowed to get their hands on prom tickets unless they are the date of an upperclassman. To purchase two prom tickets, you must provide the name of your date, which the victim in this case did in full honesty. It was when that date's name turned out to refer to a female that the shit hit the fan.

So, for saying this without even bothering to check your facts...

It seems that the girl asked for this exception to their rule, for an activist reason, knowing full well it would be denied. That automatically sets up the other side to resist it, because it's insincere; it's an activist thing. Activism is good and necessary at times. I'm just sayin'...this is Mississippi. The deep south is usu. a decade or so behind the rest of the country. (I grew up in south La., but not as south as N.O.).

I say GFY. She's not an activist, she's a normal high school girl who wants to kiss the object of her affection on the dance floor at prom, and your assumption that something more sinister is going on here sucks ass.

[Lagomorph]

77. Collective punishment....

We don't like one of you so you all must suffer.

I've had gay people in my life for 45 years. I've never been raped or humiliated by gays.

I wish it was the same for them.