Pardon the pundit, but he prostitutes press

[Shallah Kali]

APPLICATION FOR WHITE HOUSE PRESS CREDENTIALS.

To assist members of the press, we provide this application for press credentials in a handy multiple-choice format. We know that some of the answers may not be completely accurate. Just choose the one that best describes you. Please fill out the form in full and return it to either press secretary Scott McClennan or assistant press secretary Dirk Diggler.

Your Name:

No, Your Real Name:

Seriously:

Your Pseudonym:

If you don’t have a pseudonym, choose one from the following list:

A. John Bigboote.

B. Chest Rockwell.

C. Clark Kent.

D. Jeff Gannon.

What do you prefer to be called?

A. John.

B. Chest.

C. Superman.

D. Stud-muffin.

[uppityperson]

1. That's big-boo-tay'