Ted Rall Publishes Mock-Obit of Syndicated Columnist Ann Coulter

[Newsjock]

http://www.editorandpublisher.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003124200

Conservative columnist/author Ann Coulter has joked a number of times about the deaths of liberals. Now, liberal cartoonist/columnist Ted Rall has joked about Coulter's death.

In a blog entry, Rall noted that "an unnamed humor magazine" had assigned him to write a fictional Coulter obituary "in the deadpan style of The New York Times." The magazine killed the piece, so Rall posted it today on his blog.

"Coulter died from injuries sustained on September 11, 2006, when the historic replica of a dirigible in which she was riding exploded over the Hudson River near Ground Zero in lower Manhattan," wrote Rall. "Investigators from the National Transportation Safety Board believe that Coulter initiated the accident when she fired a pistol as she stormed the airship's flight deck in the mistaken belief that its bearded pilot was an Islamic hijacker."

Full 'obit' here: http://www.rall.com/rants.html

[Freedom_from_Chains]

1. That's pretty good. n/t

[filer]

2. She will be missed.

She was an inspiration to all of us.

[davidinalameda]

3. she is? she was?

:wtf:

:rofl:

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

4. LOL.

"Anne Coulter, 43 or 45, Conservative Commentator Dies."

Good stuff.

[underpants]

5. Shortly before her accident at the 9/11 "Five More Years" bash

That is some funny stuff there.

:rofl:

[warrens]

6. I would just add

She is survived by ex-boyfriends Dinesh D'Souza, the conservative author, television talk show host Bill Maher and Spin magazine founder Bob Guccione, Jr. and roughly 370 male denizens of upper east side martini bars who remembered nothing the next morning, but woke up with a harridan of uncertain gender next to them. Many have since gouged out their eyes and a reported 22 have had themselves fully castrated.

[Love Bug]

8. Bwahahahaha!!

:D

[grasswire]

9. don't forget Geraldo!

Many people assume they were linked during the attacks on Bill Clinton when she frequented Geraldo's broadcasts and would "wink" at him.

[dionysus]

7. In honor of that let me post my Libaugh peice from 2002;

Limbaugh Suffers On-Air Stroke: “They got ol’ Rush-bo this time”

Rush Limbaugh, host of the nation’s most popular conservative radio talk show program, suffered a massive stroke during his broadcast yesterday. The stroke occurred when Rush falsely reported rumors that Senator Hillary Clinton (D, NY) would be running for President in 2004, with husband and former president Bill Clinton as the choice for vice president. Limbaugh was in the middle of a table-pounding, paper rustling diatribe against the Clintons when the stroke occurred. “They got ol’ Rush-bo this time”, he gasped, before collapsing to the floor in a state of distress.

Limbaugh was immediately rushed to the hospital, where he was placed in intensive care. After taking an initial turn for the worse, the veteran broadcaster began improving slowly. By midnight, he was able to sit up in bed, drinking from a dribble cup and eating doughnuts pre-chewed by his loving wife Marta. However, he remains mostly paralyzed and cannot speak, which is terribly frustrating for the outspoken host.

There has been an outpouring of symathy among leading conservatives, among them Trent Lott, Newt Gingrich, Phil Graham, and many others. A candlelight vigil has been set up outside of the EIB studio, with a prayer group headed by Reverend Pat Robertson. “This is a terrible tragedy. Rush is a brilliant man and his voice is needed by conservative idealogues everywhere. Our prayers are with him.”, sobbed one distraught fan. The hospital was inundated with calls from ditto-heads willing to donate portions of their brains to the broadcasting legend.

Others have suggested action against the Clinton family. Old Clinton nemesis Ken Starr has been exploring grounds for conspiracy and attempted murder charges against the former President and First Lady. Enraged, Limbaugh pal and crony G. Gordon Liddy stated that, "If I ever see the two of them I will use my bald head and a magnifying glass to scorch their corneas the same way that they have mine; by being godsends to honest, hardworking Americans of every color, class, and persuasion, they have scorched the hope and dreams of old, impotent, rich white men everywhere in controlling the fate of this nation.". Calls to President Clinton’s Harlem office were not immediately returned, and Senator Clinton has been too busy responding to death threats to comment officially on Liddy’s statements.

Oliver North and Ann Coulter will co-host the show Monday through Thurday while Rush begins the long journey to recovery. Open Line Friday will be repaced with a revolving cast of real life ditto-heads commenting on clips from previous Limbaugh broadcasts. The EIB network has set up a donation fund for Limbaugh, with a senior spokesman vowing “We’ll be sure to get the best conservative doctors ditto-head money can buy.”. More details as this breaking news develops.

[yurbud]

10. Like a lot of Wm. Renquist what the hell nice could you say when she dies?

"Although Coulter wished death on numerous political enemies and was shrill, harpy-like, and factually impaired in debate," to our knowledge she has never physical harmed anyone apart from sex partners whose genitals she bit off with hers.

[Anakin Skywalker]

11. Hah Hah Hah! Funny!

You go, Teddy!

[wicket]

12. I can't get to Rall's site!

:wtf:

Must be getting a ton of traffic!

[Matilda]

13. I tried as well, without success.

I do hope it comes back, sounds like fun.

[wicket]

14. I'm able to get to it now

I love this part:

Godless also unveiled Coulter's Grand Corollary of Procyonid Gaseous Emanation: "Imagine a giant raccoon passed gas and perhaps the resulting gas might have created the vast variety of life we see on Earth. And if you don't accept the giant raccoon flatulence theory for the origin of life, you must be a fundamentalist Christian nut who believes the Earth is flat."

"Can't argue with that," remarked Professor Stephen Hawking of the University of Cambridge.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: