Weekly Thought Out News-

[babylonsister]

Not able to edit that title for some strange reason.
:rofl:

http://www.smirkingchimp.com/thread/5974

Weekly Thought Out News
by Steve Young

Following Up The Stories That Need No Followup

Going Into Unexplored Territory - Lewis "Scooter" Libby has pledged not to give up fighting his perjury conviction. "We're pulling out all the stops for my appeal," said Libby. "If it comes to it, I'd even consider telling the truth."

Any Which Way But Responsible - Libby's former boss, Dick Cheney, who had originally instructed his trusted aide to spread the word of Joe Wilson and his CIA agent wife, Valerie Plame, was disappointed in the jury's decision.
"I shot a friend in the face and got away with it," said the ever-playful Vice President, "Why should it be any different than stabbing a friend in the back?"

Looking At Your Guilty Verdict Half Full - With the Walter Reed scandal, the quagmire in Iraq and a 30% favorable rating, President Bush is pretty cheery about the Libby verdict. "The media wants to focus on the White House staff engaged in criminal activity," said spokesman Tony Snow. "The President is more gratified by how many on his staff haven't been caught."

Scooter Fun Fact - Though Libby was shown to be the consummate liar, he has never run for political office.

How Low Can You Go? Not High Enough - After dipping close to the $2.25 per gallon mark, for no apparent reason the price of gas has jumped up to near $3 per gallon leaving energy companies just as baffled as the consumer. "I guess we were caught off guard," said an Exxon executive. "We have no idea how we let the price drop to $2.25. Heads will roll. We just hope it's Al Gore's head and not ours."

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Magnet Up The Rectum Guy Update - An Iraqi national wearing wires and concealing a magnet, a polished stone and a napkin inside his derriere triggered a security scare at Los Angeles International Airport on Tuesday. A further search of the accused's derriere revealed a cache of Billy O'Reilly facts. And you thought he just pulled them out of their own ass.:spray:

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