http://www.slate.com/id/2162504/nav/tap2/Nine Other Oaths Karl Rove Could Swear
He doesn't want to tell "the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth" to Congress. Here are some alternatives.
By Hart Seely
Washington is deadlocked over the Bush administration's refusal to let Congress grill top White House aides under oath. If the impasse continues, it may cause a constitutional crisis between the legislative and executive branches, and Americans may never learn what really led to the firing of eight U.S. attorneys last year.
The root of the logjam may be that ridiculously outdated oath: "Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"
It's time for common sense. Instead of letting the lawyers argue forever, let's hammer out a compromise oath that Karl Rove and Harriet Miers could swear to Congress. Some possibilities:
1. Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, but not necessarily the whole truth, maintaining an overall average of at least 70 percent truth, subject to later verification by an independent panel, so help you God?
2. Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, but in ways that are carefully cloaked in metaphor and allegory, so they require lengthy interpretation, in a Zen sort of way, so help you Buddha?
3. Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, unless in your opinion we are not worthy of it, in which case you shout like Jack Nicholson in that movie, "The truth? You can't handle the truth!" so help us all?
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