Take Me off This Planet

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Published on Friday, January 16, 2004 by the Guardian/UK
Take Me off This Planet
by John O'Farrell


The first color photos came back from Mars last week. NASA scientists sat at their computers for ages waiting for the digital photos to download, and wishing they'd paid the extra to get broadband. But when the first images of the red planet confirmed that it was indeed sort of reddish, they were beside themselves with excitement. "The surfaces of the rocks are remarkably smooth and the shapes are quite varied," enthused lead scientist Dr Steven Squyres. "Some of them are quite rounded and some of them quite angular."

It doesn't get much more thrilling than this. "Right, so no actual green men then?" asked the journalist in the front row. "Or Klingons in flying saucers maybe?" added another optimistically as the next 20 photos of smooth rocks were proudly described.

But having seen these postcards from another planet, George Bush announced that we really have to see this place for ourselves, and on Wednesday he announced a massive expansion of the United States space program that will see a manned flight to Mars within the next couple of decades. Take-off is planned for the year 2020, or later if they let Dubya do the final countdown from 10 to lift-off.

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The flight to Mars will take six months, so one of the biggest challenges will be organizing the in-flight entertainment. Astronauts will spend the first few weeks flicking between the channels showing Mr Bean or non-stop Motown classics. It's either that or take off the little headphones and listen to the bloke in the next seat moaning about the fact that you have to pay extra for them.


http://www.commondreams.org/views04/0116-10.htm



This is a really funny read. Reminds me a bit of Dave Barry. Just thought we could use something light-hearted (albeit cynical) for a breather. ;-)