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Edited on Tue Feb-03-04 11:35 AM by DemoTex
The world is a planet. Yes: a planet, hurtling through space, maintaining the optimum temperature, atmosphere, chemical composition and ocean-to-landmass ratio to support a vast, teeming variety of life. This life is dominated by a single species, itself governed by rules of infinite and ever-evolving complexity. Indeed, no other species in the history of this planet that is the world has ever exhibited such a dazzling array of contradictory behaviours.
And let us assume that the dominant group of the dominant species of this planet has a leader, and that leader was elected in a free and fair election, even if technically he wasn’t, but this is all a for-instance, so just let me finish here. And this leader takes a long look at this planet that is the world, and he looks back on its long, complex history (or rather his aides brief him on it, although he gets a faraway look in his eye whenever they do), and he clears his throat, and he adjusts his necktie, and he says, simply, ‘Bring it on.’
And all the denizens of the planet say, ‘Bring it on?’
‘Bring it on,’ repeats the leader and the denizens reply, ‘But—’
‘No buts,’ says the leader.
‘Yeah, but—’
‘I said no buts,’ the leader says.
‘Okay. However—’
‘No howevers, either.’
‘No howevers?’
‘No buts, howevers, in facts, actuallys, or you-sees,’ says the leader, through an interpreter. ‘No wait-a-minutes, no can’t-we-discuss-thises, no hold-on-a-moments. No heys. No stop-its. No aren’t-you-listenings. No comparisons, metaphors, allegories, or similes. No what-ifs, how-abouts, or just-supposes. No nos. Just…bring it on.’
And so, the denizens get together and confer over this new state of things, and they are forced to decide whether to bring it on, or not to bring it on. It’s a hard decision—it keeps them up all night. But really, there never was a choice. Ultimately, unfortunately, unavoidably, it must be brought on.
And so it is. (More ...) http://www.granta.com/extracts/2106
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