Tue Jul 8, 7:58 PM ET
The Triumph of Faith-Based Politics
NEW YORK--I believe in John McCain. Which is why I don't believe him.
When John McCain said he wanted to stay in Iraq 100 years, he didn't mean it. He just said it to get elected.
His claims that the war is going great? Voting time after time to send hundreds of billions of dollars to fund the war without asking for a timetable for withdrawal? All part of his masterful plan to fool right-wing hicks into voting for him.
Once he gets the keys to 1600 Penn, the real, antiwar McCain will reveal his true plan: Evacuation from Iraq within 24 hours. An apology to the United Nations. Bush put on trial for war crimes. Mandatory gay marriage.
He's got a similar plan for FISA. True, he voted to allow the president to eavesdrop on Americans' phone calls and e-mails. He gave the phone companies immunity for the years that they spied on us illegally. As soon as he becomes president, however, McCain will line up all those lying, spying phone company CEOs against the White House wall and personally shoot them with his trusty sidearm, the Beretta PX4.
And he will laugh...
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ucru/20080708/cm_ucru/beliefyoucanchange