AlterNet /
By Liz Langley 8 Reasons Marriage Doesn't Matter
We women are smart enough to know that a wedding ring won’t make us happy any more than a white dress will make us a virgin. April 14, 2010 |
Women are carpet-bombed with the idea that marriage is their happy ending from their first viewing of Cinderella to the last potboiler Rom Com they saw starring Sarah Jessica Jennifer Kate Meg Julia Whatsherhair. Marriage is also ever-present in the news, whether it’s gay marriage, the divorce rate or sex scandals involving politicians and golfers. It’s on TV 24/7 in the form of “Bridezillas," “Say Yes to the Dress,” and various reality shows that have turned a sacrament into a raffle.
Now a study titled – I’m not kidding -- "I'm a Loser, I'm Not Married, Let's Just All Look At Me," tells us that social pressure has managed to make women between 25-35 feel both scrutinized and invisible if they’re not married.
“Heightened visibility came from feelings of exposure and invisibility came from assumptions made by others," said Larry Ganong of the University of Missouri, who conducted the study of 32 interviews with women, along with Elizabeth Sharp of Texas Tech University. A single woman’s world, it seems, consists mainly of feeling stigmatized by singlehood, worrying about the draining dating pool and listening to her biological clock thump away like the Tell-Tale Heart.
Having been single all my life I swear on my MacBook that it does not all consist solely of feeling glum at bouquet tosses. And while I’m almost as in love with love as Barbara Cartland, I believe we women are smart enough to know that a wedding ring won’t make us happy any more than a white dress will make us a virgin. The desire to get it right might be part of the reason people are putting off marriage until later. (Plus, according to Time magazine, life expectancy is increasing…and the average marrying age is increasing at the same exact pace.) .........(more)
The complete piece is at:
http://www.alternet.org/sex/146474/8_reasons_marriage_doesn%27t_matter