Attack of the Terror Babies! First They Come for Your Citizenship

[bemildred]

If not for Texas representative Louie Gohmert, America might never have known about terror babies and their dastardly plan to be born to foreign parents on U.S. soil, leave immediately on terror-baby airplanes, only to return to terrorize the soil they were born on. But Gohmert wasn't going to let babies win, so he announced their evil plans on the House floor in July. That awful 14th Amendment — some parts of the Constitution are just not for keeps. Yesterday, Anderson Cooper invited Gohmert on his show to talk about why he chose to launch his anti-baby campaign without, well, evidence. Notoriously pro-baby Anderson begins with a statement from former high-ranking FBI official Tom Fuentes about the "ludicrous" claim: "There was never a credible report, or any report for that matter, coming across through all the various mechanisms of communication to indicate that there was such a plan for these terror babies to be born." Let the yelling begin!

http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2010/08/attack_of_the_terror_babies_fi.html

[Xipe Totec]

1. Sockeye salmon are terrorists?

They come to our rivers as suicide spawners, leave their babies to be hatched on US soil and immediately leave the country.

Salam, salmon.

[leftofcool]

2. OMG! Terrorist babies in those smelly diapers blowing up our malls and stuff.

[ChairmanAgnostic]

3. runny baby poop? Another WMD?

That makes sense.

[FSogol]

4. They're going to drool on R Freedumbs!11 And smear strained peas

across the mouth of Liberty111! 1M CERES

[JBoy]

5. Obviously, time to start making extra-small waterboards.

[pinboy3niner]

7. Halliburton/KBR will get right on it...

...as soon as they finish with that order of teeny teeny teeny teeny weeny handcuffs for Sheriff Joe. :)

[damntexdem]

6. Does this mean that Gohmert refuses to kiss these babies?

That doesn't seem politically smart. ;-)