I think everyone could use a good laugh so I want to post this over here to give all of you a good chuckle. It was something I'd posted on my blog about 3 years ago. The first paragraph was taken from Onion News. After the copyright sourse credit I added my 2 cents.
CHINESE AUTHORITIES EXECUTE 10 MILLION RECALLED TOYS
September 24, 2007
BEIJING—In an attempt to assure the world's children that the millions of Chinese-made toys currently being recalled for containing toxic lead paint and tiny choking hazards can no longer hurt them, high-level Chinese officials announced Tuesday that millions of playthings are being rounded up and immediately put to death.
"We are committed to the well-being of children and putting the consumer's mind at ease," said Chinese president Hu Jintao at a press conference. "Boys and girls of the world, you need not worry. Your toys will be executed swiftly and harshly. When we are through, there will be nothing left to play with."
In the past six weeks, Mattel Inc. has recalled more than 20 million toys from China that are believed to contain lead paint and other safety defects, a situation that prompted the Chinese government to send People's Liberation Army forces into major industrial sectors to mercilessly slaughter any remaining items that have not been exported for sale overseas. So far, an estimated 9 to 10 million toys, from anonymous dolls and miniature cars to trademarked characters such as Thomas the Tank Engine, Curious George, and Big Bird have been reportedly kicked, smashed with rifles, shocked with electric batons, hanged, and pounded with nails, before having their ears severed and eyes gouged out, and then being shot.
Source:
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/chinese_authorities_execute_10Five regiments of GI Joe dolls attempted to stop the Communists from killing their allies but the entire group was also wiped out when the dolls realized their weapons didn’t work against real guns and ammunition.
The United Nations decried the executions and took a vote on sanctions against Red China. After intense lobbying by the United States, the vote was withdrawn. The founder and president of FAMC (Fuck America’s Middle Class), Ronald Redneck from Alabama, applauded the U.S. action saying, “I am sick and tired of these commie, socialist type countries who want to stifle global markets. They should just shut the hell up and let the open the global capitalistic marketplace determine which dolls should be executed.” When told that China fit the ‘commie’ description he simply dismissed the claim saying it was just some “more liberal bullshit intended to prevent people from making an honest buck”.
The popular Bratz dolls in America organized a national protest against the Chinese action by setting up picket lines in front of every Chinese restaurant in the States.
(source of last part of story came from a wild and crazy imagination with the help of my wife who is as crazy as I am)
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