# Do Boys in Tutus Break God’s ‘Chain of Command’? by Candace Chellew-Hodge

[Shallah Kali]

Candace Chellew-Hodge is the founder/editor of Whosoever: An Online Magazine for GLBT Christians and currently serves as the pastor of Jubilee! Circle United Church of Christ in Columbia, S.C. She is also the author of Bulletproof Faith: A Spiritual Survival Guide for Gay and Lesbian Christians (Jossey-Bass, 2008).

http://www.religiondispatches.org/dispatches/candacechellew-hodge/3692/do_boys_in_tutus_break_god%E2%80%99s_%E2%80%98chain_of_command%E2%80%99/


Feminist theologian Beverly Harrison has written that the connections between homophobia and misogyny run deep because “the social control of women as a group has totally shaped our deepest and most basic attitudes toward sexuality.” That control is so complete that society expects “compulsory heterosexuality” and its only alternatives are celibacy or asexuality.

This social control then, Harrison posits, is at the heart of not just the inequality of women, but the inequality faced by gays and lesbians.

“We must acknowledge that it is through our socialization to sexuality that we begin to learn ‘fear of equality’ and either to feel ‘strong’ by lording it over others or to feel ‘safe’ by being controlled by them. By conforming rigidly to ‘masculine’ or ‘feminine’ roles, we learn, at a foundational level, to tolerate inequality.”

snip

Despite their status as victims, however, what these women did to this mother is nothing short of bullying. Their reactions — even though they may come masked as “concern” — really spring from an unconscious place of deeply internalized misogyny. More importantly, these mothers are models for their children — and in attacking this mother for “allowing” her son to wear a dress they are creating more Christian bullies who feel free to attack anyone who steps outside of their assigned gender roles.