Happy People in 2004

[Plaid Adder]

nostamj makes a good point in his "second Stonewall" thread about the impact that the images from San Francisco et al. are having, and will continue to have, on the American political climate. I just want to add a couple points from my own history:

The second lesbian wedding I went to was out in California at a wonderful spot called Wilbur Hot Springs. One of the brides was a friend of mine from college; I didn't know her partner that well. Anyway, my friend had spent some time complaining about how her mother, who was doing her best to be supportive but clearly on some level had not accepted my friend's sexuality, kept trivializing the wedding and calling it "your little ceremony," etc. Well, came the day and the wedding happened, and it was beautiful. Not a dry eye in the house. We got together with the happy couple a day or two later in SF and my friend said that the best thing about it was that her mother's take on their relationship was totally transformed by attending the ceremony. Apparently, she was so affected by seeing her daughter look so happy during the wedding that it just changed her, and now they are all one big happy family.

A while ago when the SF thing was new there was a thread started by one of our straight brethren--I think it was a_random_joel--to the effect that he hadn't been in favor of same-sex marriage before, but looking at the pictures of the gay couples getting married in SF had converted him, because you could just tell how happy they were and how much it meant to them. This cheered me up a lot.

A few months ago my partner and I registered as a domestic partnership. It has extremely limited practical value, but we were eligible for it anyway so we went and did it. It is not marriage--not by a long shot--but I was really moved by how happy it made my partner to have *some* legal recognition, no matter how small. We just got the pictures back. They're crappy little 3 x 5 prints from a dispos-a-cam but you can STILL tell how happy she is. I love those pictures. I look forward to showing them to everyone I can buttonhole.

There's something about real happiness that cuts through all the crap to reach people. You can explain why marriage matters to straight people all you want but many of them are so used to taking it for granted that they just can't get it. But a picture is worth a thousand words, as they say. It's like the one real thing in the hall of mirrors that this debate has become. Now there are loads of people out there who are just so blinded by the rhetoric that they can no longer perceive this happiness; but there are loads of people who aren't, and in the end, I gotta have hope for humanity and believe that the people who recognize this happiness and want to see more of it are going to outnumber the ones who are just going to think, "AAAGH! PERVERTS KISSING! GET ME MY BIBLE AND MY SHOTGUN, PRUDENCE!"

So here's the choice in 2004: you can have the party that wants to bring the country more happiness, or the party that wants to bring the country more fear and misery. Duh...which box will YOU check?

C ya,

The Plaid Adder

[Avalon Sparks]

1. Well Put~

It is wonderful to see consenting adults so happy!