Vets out there in DU land should I be worried?????

[Mari333]

My stepson hasnt emailed us in 4 days, he usually emails us every day from his army compound at Abu Ghuraib prison in Baghdad where he is stationed. After I recieved threatening phone calls yesterday from the unit seargant's wife telling me that if I continued protesting against this war or writing letters about it, my stepson would "be in deep trouble for what his mother is saying against the war", is it possible the Sgt in charge of him, this womans husband in the unit, is harming my stepson in some way, or not letting him send emails to us?????? I called a lawyer, I called the army, I told a large number of people about this today. Ive been told that if any military personnel abuse Michael in any way its a direct violation of Title 138A and I have sent Michael an email giving him a lawyers name and email addrss and number.
But can this seargants wife do anything, can she call her husband in Baghdad and make life difficult for Michael???? as I said, he emails us every day and for 4 DAYS WE HAVE HEARD NOTHING FROM HIM
add to that our terror that he is in the middle of a place where today soldiers died..
Please, if there are any Vets out there, can my loved one be harmed by his own unit for me speaking out against the war?
I feel like we are losing our minds with worry.

[Webster Green]

1. The sargeant's wife is out of line......

You have the right to say whatever you want about the war. Call her back and tell her to shove it!

And stay on the offensive about your right to free speech.

[qb]

Contact your senators and representatives

If they have any compassion they will be moved by your story. It's too bad Wellstone is gone - he was well known for intervening on behalf of servicemembers.

[Nlighten1]

17. I second this and...

see if they can get the Armed Services Committee involved.

[jackstraw45]

32. I agree...

Look up your rep and senators and call their LOCAL offices first and look for a sympathetic ear. If no luck, call DC but hopefully someone on the staff will help.

Congressfolk can do a lot if they want to (by that, I mean their staffs).

Best of luck!

[tandot]

2. wow ... threats and intimidation

What right does some idiot right-wing fanatic military wife have to threaten an American if she or he uses the right to freedom of speech? Is this still America we are talking about???

Those bastards. I am sorry that you have to go through that BS.

I am not a Vet and don't know the right answer to your question. Personally, I would write to the local media and alert as many people as possible. She is threatening you and your son.

I hope you get some answers from vets. This behavior is the most disgusting ever.

[Free_Thinking1]

8. I really hate to say it

but sometimes drawing as much attention as possible to something like this makes matters worse. I really don't think this is a problem. I doubt the Sgt and his wife see eye to eye on this. Next time you talk to him, just ask him if maybe he is being treated differently. If he says he is, then contact his unit, there should be someone still in the rear you can talk to and let them know what is going on. If nothing happens, contact a unit higher and higher and so on until you make it too the politicians. Like I said though, I really don't think you will see this to be an issue except for a dumb person making dumb remarks.

[Columbia]

28. You are right

She should be trying to mend rifts instead of creating new ones. If her son wasn't being treated any differently, he may be now if this course continues.

[prolesunited]

56. And that would give them exactly what they want

They use threats to silence her and you want her to comply? All that will do is continue the cycle of silencing dissent.

You have said your son was in favor of you speaking up, didn't you. If he's willing, I would continue to speak up, but only if you have his consent since he will bear the brunt of any retaliatory actions.

[Columbia]

67. Who said anything about silence?

Being more vague about troop locations and such would clearly keep her in the clear and if she still continues to get harassed, she would have a better case that they are doing so for her views and not her release of information.

[struggle4progress]

31. The more people that know about this the better.

I also am not a vet. But someone is trying to frighten into silence, and covering it up will not stop it. What a sorrow ...

[Free_Thinking1]

35. I didn't suggest a cover up

I simply suggested finding out if there is a fire before pulling the alarm.

[Misinformed01]

3. It's a shame you can't

give that snotty bitch my phone number. Some officer's wives are far worse than Stepford Wives....hell, at least the SW's were somewhat pleasant to talk to.

[Free_Thinking1]

4. I wouldn't worry too much

Can he be harmed because of it? of course, would it be illegal for anyone to do that? Yes. Is it very likely? I don't think so. Do I think the wife of the Sgt is a huge asshole? YES.

Seriously, it all depends on the unit he is in and how big of a jerk the Sgt in charge of him is. I know that in the units I was in this sort of thing would have never happened and I would have never done anything to anyone I was in charge of because of their parents beliefs.

More than likely the system he emails on is just down. The systems the military uses often times isn't the greatest and any little thing can shut it down for days. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Good luck to you and I hope your stepson makes it home to you safely soon.

[caledesi]

5. I am so sorry Mari.

My heart goes out to you. Please, please find a GOOD lawyer.

This makes me sick!

[jpak]

11. Yes, get a lawyer to write a strong letter to this woman.

You have perfect constitutional right to your opinion.

She has NO right to threaten your son.

If she continues these threats or follows through on them, tell her you will do everything in your power to have HER husband courts martiale....

... and you will initiate whatever legal action against her that is appropriate.

Then watch HER squirm.

[TreasonousBastard]

6. Of course you're worried sick about not hearing...

from him, anyone would be, but it will probably be nothing serious.

Legally, there's no way they can do anything to him for your actions, but in practice they can put him on all sorts of crappy details, restrictive duty, and harass him if they want to. they may be keeping him from email for a while, or put him on some duty where it's inaccessable.

Deliberately putting him in the way of actual harm would be unconscionable, and while the sargeant's wife may be battling demons of her own about the war, it's highly unlikely that his unit would take it out on him to any great extent just because she says she doesn't like what you're doing. They have other concerns over there.

Your first concern is about your stepson, naturally, but it helps to remember that, politics aside, this woman is also worried sick about her husband coming home in one piece. The two of you may have a lot more in common than you have differences, and perhaps you can meet in the middle somewhere.

[wryter2000]

7. Who's your Congressperson?

Can he/she get word from your stepson? I wouldn't worry about that witch-with-a-b too much, but I can understand being beside yourself because you haven't heard from your stepson.

Please keep us updated!

[atreides1]

9. Just One View

I ran into this problem while on active duty, wives who go around wearing their husbands rank, trying to grab power that they don't have. This woman has no authority, none. She's just another shrill repug supporter that wants to control another persons life. While the
sergeant may be able to keep him busy enough to not give him the time he needs to send e-mails, he cannot stop him from writing home. Even
this sergeant cannot interfere with the US Mail, doing so is a violation of federal law and can result in a dishonorable discharge and even some time in a federal prison.

If the sergeant starts to abuse your stepson, charges can be brought
under the UCMJ or even the Manuals of Courts Martial, and at this point in time I don't think his sergeant would want a whole lot of light on him, considering that 6 MP's have been charged with maltreatment of prisoners, and 9 other MP's and 2 civilians are still
being investigated. It would not be good for PR, for a sergeant to abuse the son of an American who is exercising their right to free speech. Something that he swore to defend.

The next time this woman calls you, tape the conversation, and then
send the transcript to a TV news show or even a newspaper, make sure you get her name and the name of her husband. If this runs, I'm willing to bet that the chain of command back here in the states will be paying a quick visit to this woman, and she will be the one who
gets silenced. Make sure you find out what the laws in your state are
regarding the recording of telephone conversations.

The gloves have to come off, and we have to be as willing as the other side to get down and dirty, and to play the game they do.

I hope some of this helps.

[Free_Thinking1]

12. I think you should remain level headed.

Talk to your step son first. I doubt the Sgt even knows his wife has said these things. No need to get him in hot water over something his stupid wife a few thousand miles away said. If come to find out there is something going on, then by all means, do everything in your power to bring the hammer down on him.

[tabasco]

58. Good advice.

The only one who's done anything wrong is the civilian wife of an NCO. Your stepson will be in touch soon. I really doubt that his chain of command would prevent him from emailing you. The last thing his commander wants is a "congressional." But if there is apparent wrongdoing by any military, the best thing to do is contact the Congressman for your district.
BTW, most of the folks in the military are great people, like your stepson.

[Florida_Geek]

10. I would Linda Tripp it

Radio Shack sells a device for recording telephone calls. This device connects between your phone and a recorder with a "remote" jack on it. So in most cases you have to buy both the device and a cheap recorder with a remote plug.

The device is title "Telephone Recording Control" and the RS part number on mine is 43-228A

In some states(like 13) it is illegal to do one-sided recording. But if the call is from out of state, it is legal. But if you live in a state where it is illegal, who cares if you are recording threating calls.

Once the device is connected to the recorder, all you have to do is hit record on the tape recorder when you want to record a call.

[Mari333]

20. I dont think they will becalling again I called the police and reported

them, names, numbers, etc. I will not allow harassment, and I have written a letter and sent my son the name and email of a lawyer if hes harassed in any way due to this woman.

[Florida_Geek]

27. But I hate to say it but

if you keep speaking out, others like her will call, that why I sugguested the recorder.

[Stephanie]

13. Mari, are you friends with any other wives or mothers from his unit?

Can you check to find out if they've gotten email?

[Mari333]

16. No, these women that called are supposd to be

the contact persons for the unit. the support group contact people for the military families. They abused their position. I understand their fears and anger, but they cannot take their angst out on me, or attack me and my husband and threaten my stepson. So I will pursue it and demand it stop. They might do it to someone else.

[Stephanie]

22. So there aren't any of them that would still be friendly to you?

Every one of them is a freeper? Because if there are any cool ones then maybe you could find out if they're getting email from their boys or not.

[Kimber Scott]

14. Contact the Red Cross for info

They will contact his unit to make sure he is alright. Assuming he is, then his commander will have him contact you.

[Mari333]

15. I sent this letter to the same newspaper that printed my first letter

On Sunday, March 21, my husband and I recieved a number of harassing phone
calls concerning the letter printed on that same day from one of the women
in my stepson's unit, the 428th MP company. This woman announced to me that
she is the head of the Military Family Readiness Group out of South Bend,
Indiana. She, and 2 other members of this "Readiness Group" called my
unlisted phone number, which she had accessed through the group files, and
proceeded to harass my husband and myself about our anti war stance and the
letters I send to the editor concerning my position on the war in Iraq. She
also threatened "retaliation" towards my stepson, and advised me that "I
have spoken with the commandant and the general and you have broken army
code by writing against the war in Iraq". She was angry that I mentioned
that the 428th MP battalion is stationed at Abu Ghuraib Prison, which, if
she read any newspaper, is common knowledge, and the South Bend Tribune
published an article about them on Sunday.
I believe these calls were attempts to shut me up, to get me and my husband
to "tow the line" and not speak out against this occupation in Iraq.
As a civilian, and an American citizen, I have every right to speak out on a
daily basis, with no fear that my stepson as a soldier in Baghdad should
suffer any repercussions.
I have forwarded all the information and phone numbers and names of the
callers from the "Military Family Readiness Group" to Senator Carl Levin's
Military Affairs personnel. I have also called the Army Headquarters, and
spoken with their adjunct general about this matter, and I have informed Ft
Dix personnel about this matter.
I have also emailed my stepson, who is in Iraq, who has not emailed us for
4 days, that if he is harassed in any way because of my husband and I
speaking out against the war, he has legal rights according to Title 138A of
Army Law, and he has the name and number of a military lawyer.
I have heard from other military families against this war that have spoken
out, and been harassed like this, and so I write this letter to bring this
to light, and make people aware of it.
If these women and one man who called me are angry , they too can write a
letter to the newspaper and disagree with me. Thats the American way. We all
have First Amendment rights.
To call me and my husband, give away our private number to others and then
threaten my stepson is outrageous, and is a direct violation of military
law.
This will not go unnoticed, and I can promise you that a full investigation
of this is underway by the Adjunct General's office and others, including
Sen Carl Levins office.
Its hard enough worrying about our child under mortar attack daily in Iraq,
without having harassing phone calls from members or wives of his unit who
use my unlisted phone number for their own personal angst. If they are
angry, they can write a letter to the newspaper.
In the meantime, I suggest they visit military families speak out at
www.mfso.org .
Again, this will be dealt with through legal and appropriate channels, but
it WILL be dealt with .
Sincerely

[Free_Thinking1]

19. I really think you jumped too soon.

I would have at least taken the time to find out if this was a problem. The military likes to keep problems in house, whether you agree with it or not, that is the way it works. Hate to say it, but things like this a lot of times create more problems then they solve.

[Mari333]

21. well I dont think so.

I would be happy if the right channels are persued, but I want to keep the heat on.
I want my stepson to be safe, and I feel its important to keep the heat on because I dont trust that anything will be done about this if I dont.

[Free_Thinking1]

25. It is important for him to be safe

but I really think you should have waited to see if this was a problem and not his stupid wife running her mouth about things she has no control over. But, he is your stepson so you can, and should, do whatever it is that makes you feel comfortable. Good luck to you and your stepson, keep us updated on what happens please.

[Mari333]

30. May be this will make him safer

if they know I will scream to high heaven about it. and get the press on them. I wont allow him to be put in this position and yes, I hope he is okay but I dont know because we have gotten no emails in 4 days.

[Free_Thinking1]

34. Like I said, he is in a war zone

sometimes the email will go down, it happens all the time. I don't know about the Army, but I know when I was on ship (I was a Marine) there were times when they would shut down the email so that no one would let the cat out of the bag on anything. 4 days is not long enough to panic about, and certainly not enough to be writing your congressman about. I also don't know why you asked for opinions when you already had your mind made up on what you would do. I hope this works out for you, though I fear you may have actually compounded his problems, especially if the Sgt ends up getting a hard time for something he didn't even do and then your step son is seen as a whiner or a buddy-f&*%$r. That is just my opinion. Good luck.

[Mari333]

41. But I wrote to the congressman about a military family readiness group

this woman is in a position of accountability. She directly threatened me, and our child, and violated her position. That is cause for concern, and that is what I wrote to the congressman about. I know how easily these complaints are shuffled under the rug, and I know how meaningless I am to that entire system. I dont want her pull to create havoc for my stepson. as I said, he hasnt written in 4 days, and he always writes.
I am afraid for him, and afraid this woman might have some pull and could harm him. I wont allow that so I have got to go on the offensive and keep HER in the position of the one who is to be held accountable for malfeseance in this matter.
I have never dealt with the military before, and I am shocked at how its treating us.

[Free_Thinking1]

45. All I am saying is

if she is a key wife (the Marine term for the wives who serve as contacts during a deployment) then she is a volunteer, not a government employee and other than telling her she can't volunteer any more, there isn't much that can be done to her.

[DiverDave]

37. The idiot that called

put it "out of the house"
How about a little support, huh?

Mari, That women had no right to do that.
I am behind you 100%

[Free_Thinking1]

39. I do support her

and all the families of service men and women 100%. I don't think I have come across as not being supportive at all. I am just telling it how it is and giving honest advice on what I think I would do in this situation which, I though, was what she wanted. Sorry for trying to help.

[qb]

33. Excellent letter!

I think you are right to deal with this unconscionable abuse immediately.

[Free_Thinking1]

36. HOW DO YOU KNOW IT IS ABUSE?????

Right now all she knows is that some idiot wife is running her mouth, she has no idea if her step son is being treated differently or not. Why do I feel like I'm beating my head against a wall here?

[saigon68]

46. Be careful here, the military is filled with Bad people

E-mail me privately there are some ex military intelligence people here who are up to no good.

[Free_Thinking1]

47. I am an ex military intelligence guy

and I am not up to no good. *CONSPIRACY THEORY ALERT*

[0007]

81. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((Bong))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[Free_Thinking1]

82. What does

((((((((((((((((((((((Bong)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) mean?

[trumad]

83. It means TheInfamousthey, is that you're busted!

http://www.gibe.com/forum/messages.asp?forumid=1&topicid=10101&spf=1&pref=9#a153125

And you had the nerve to say this:
" By the time I'm done with them, come November, they will all be voting for Bush and thanking me for it! LOL!

Lefty liberals are so fucking stupid it's pathetic!"

Looks like you aren't going to make it past noon on March 23rd.....

Bye

[Divernan]

18. It happened in Vietnam

In Vietnam, 600 American officers were murdered by their own troops and another 1400 died "mysteriously", according to historian Terry Anderson of Texas A&M. (google it to get the cite).
The murders generated the term "fragging", because many of them were committed with fragmentation grenades. The definition is the murder of one American soldier, usually a superior officer or an NCO, by another American soldier.

Try to remember that families of the other soldiers in your stepson's unit are feeling just as terrified as you are. Also keep in mind that the soldiers in Iraq, in addition to fearing for their lives 24/7, are very concerned about the pressures on their family members back home. It's reasonable to assume that a lot of your stepson's fellow soldiers, not to mention the sgt., have heard from their family members of whatever it is you've been saying in your protests. I would expect they are angry at you for upsetting their families, and they might well transfer their angry feelings to your stepson.

I had a classmate (Marine Corps/graduate of Annapolis) who fought in Vietnam. In Iraq War I, he was a general who addressed the troops, and I actually heard this broadcast on the evening news. He told them no one ever talked to his unit before they went into battle, and that's why he was talking to this battalion in Iraq. He said what will get you safely home to the ones you love is your fellow soldiers, and the love that soldiers have for each other. In other words, they had to be able to count on each other to protect each other and to rescue them if they were wounded. It's esprit de corps - and frankly, it sounds like your very specific protests are damaging that for your stepson's unit. If I were you, I would want my stepson to be very good friends with everyone in his unit.

You posted earlier that other family members were upset that you had publicized through your protests, where your stepson's unit was stationed. I think you can protest the war very effectively without identifying a particular unit, or where they are posted, or the kind of duty they have. You can just preface your protests with the fact that you have a family member in a national guard unit that is in the Baghdad area.

I hope that he is safe, and I think you should stop including so much specific detail in your protests.
ON EDIT:

I just read your latest post re that info had been published in the local newspaper. I understand that was AFTER you had put the same information out in some manner. The thing is, your stepson's fellow soldiers will not associate him with what the local paper says, the way they will with what you say.
Have you discussed this with your stepson? I think you should. If he's OK with it, fine. If not, rethink the amount of identifying detail you publish on the internet or in the paper or wherever.

[Mari333]

23. Thats silly, because all of these families had newspaper articles

about their loved ones in Abu Ghuraib prison in Baghdad in the south bend Tribune just the other day!!! so Im not letting out any information they arent giving out..they even posted pictures of their kids and husbands!
Its no top secret.
They are just angry because Im not towing the line.

[Divernan]

24. See my comments added on edit to my first post.

NT

[Zookeeper]

26. Do you have the e-mail address...

of any of his friends in his unit?

[Mari333]

29. No. I dont know any of the other people in his unit

.

[DiverDave]

38. Do you have HER email address?

I would love to send her a piece of my mind. grrr

[myrna minx]

40. My friend, who was stationed in Tikrit,

had access to the satellite phone once every 4 to 5 days, therefore he and his wife were incommunicado for most of the week. At that point, he did not have access to email, so I do not know if it is a similar situation.

I am so sorry that you and your husbund are going through this. Please know Mari, that all of us at DU are behind you throught this difficult time.

[texasdem99]

42. Some words from a vet

If, in fact, it's the Sgt. who is pissed off and not just his wife, then you still have little to worry about. The most that would happen to him is maybe a little extra duty here and there, maybe picking up cigarette butts, or something else that would have had to be done anyway, and the Sgt. makes your stepson do it because he's got a grudge.

But I doubt it. The Army can be harsh, but its not like there's no recourse if you're getting fucked over by a superior. In smaller military units like squads and companies, word gets around fast. If a Sgt. was being deliberately unfair and repeatedly punking your stepson with all kinds of B.S. duties, then the Platoon Sgt, executive officer, or company commander would get wind of it. The soldiers in a company are surprisingly close and the NCO's and officers don't like to screw over their own, even if they disagree with what his mother said to the press. Most likely, if he's a likable kid, then you have nothing to worry about. Soldiers have enough to do without reading the newspaper; I'm willing to bet that 90% of his unit is unaware of the situation.

Hope that helps. I think it's just happenstance that you haven't heard from him.

Edit: Also, my brother-in-law is over in Afghanistan right now. His wife says that the link for email is really unreliable and takes forever, probably still on a 1200 baud modem, the way the Army gets around to updating their equipment. I sent him an email about two weeks ago and still haven't heard.

[demsrule4life]

43. Time for you to back off on this

You might not like it but here is something for you to think about. Your son needs to "keep his shit together" to stay alive. His complete focus has to be on that. If his mind is elsewhere like wondering what you are up to instead of concentrating on staying alive, he just might end up dead. Harsh words, I'm sorry but that is how it is out there. I'm not saying you have to give up protesting, just leave his name and his unit out of it. I speak from experience, I've been in two combat zones and since I have a great wife I never had to worry about home, just worry about myself, my buddies and what was going on around me.

[Mari333]

49. He knows we are protesting against the war and he supports it

these other families talk about their units and where they are and what they are doing all the time on the news!
and Im supposed to shut up according to them because Im against the war and not mention his name and unit but these other families can?
I dont think so.

[Free_Thinking1]

51. I wouldn't mention his name and unit if I were you

but that is just because I know that it is in his best interest not to draw that kind of attention.

[Columbia]

53. If you do care about your stepson's safety

It would be a simple matter not to use his name or unit in your protests. Doing so out of spite is not a good reason to endanger your stepson.

[Rex]

44. It depends on how your stepsons NCOs feel about your actions

he might hate Bush just as much as you do. He does have the ability to make your stepsons life a living hell (sorry, but you asked). Mostly it depends on your sons rank and MOS. The sgts wife is way out of line and has no right to tell you what to do. Often what happens is the wife of someone who is in a leadership role ASSUMES that they too have equal power over the families of the ones who serve under their spouse. This is not only NOT the case, but has no legal holdings in a court of law (military or otherwise). This woman is harassing you and perhaps has threatened your child's well being...call your congress person! Demand that she either stop or take her to court!

Hang tough and keep your chin up!

[Mari333]

48. I talked with Nancy Lessin just now at mfso.org

and she is livid..she said to keep putting this in the news and every thing I say to the news or to the media is an insurance policy that this wont happen again, the military hates when this sort of thing happens, but they will sweep it under the rug if it isnt exposed and dealt with and she said it was good I sent all those letters off and good I sent the letter to the paper and to keep on keeping on about this kind of harassment...she said it has to be done to keep these people on their toes, and make sure they dont do it to anyone else.
If theres anyone I trust, its her..shes the head of military families speak out and she has recieved death threats for over a year, and she just publishes their names and numbers and tapes them and exposes them for the cowards they are
So far she says Im doing the right things. Thank you god for Nancy Lessin.

[Free_Thinking1]

50. Thank God for Nancy Lessin,

blowing the cover off of possibly nothing. Sorry, just think everyone needs to stop assuming the worst. From what you have told me, nothing has happened. Someone who is clearly an idiot called you and said dumb things, happens to me all the time. Once you find out there is something to report that is when you report it.

[Lars39]

52. You have worked this thread up one side and down the other.

There IS something to report and Mari's doing so. You clearly have some kind of bee in your bonnet.

[Free_Thinking1]

55. The bee in my bonnet is the fact that she asks for opinions

and then ignores them completely. She had her mind made up before what she was going to do and no matter who tells her what she is going to do it just to "stick it to the man".

[Lars39]

60. Marie asked for advice and support.

Not everybody gives the advice that is best followed. :shrug:

[revcarol]

57. It's NOTHING that she is being threatened?

And that the woman is threateneing to have her son get a dishonorable discharge. That would make ME pretty irate.
From following Mari's posts here, don't think she is the type that keeps her cool well, but this is certainly not NOTHING.

[Columbia]

61. The point is to defuse the situation

Not to make it worse than it already is, unless that is her true objective.

[Lars39]

63. No. I'd say the point is, at the very least, to have the woman who phoned

relieved of her position.

[Columbia]

65. I thought the safety of her stepson was paramount

But if it is instead vengeance against a woman who stupidly acted on emotion rather than reason, than by all means, have at it.

[Lars39]

68. Comes down to the folks in charge.

They can deal with a spouse who is abusing her position. And they can see to it that Mari's son isn't singled out for abuse.

[Columbia]

69. The first rule of avoiding terrorism

Is to not draw attention to yourself.

She is doing just the opposite and I hope her son does not suffer for it.

[Lars39]

70. Seems some of the other guy's spouses saw nothing wrong with

having names and pictures published. I guess it's just more fun to harass family members. :shrug:

[Columbia]

71. They are all in the same boat

You and I don't know how they feel about other articles, only about what they say Mari333 wrote. It just doesn't make sense to alienate those she should be closest to. It would be just as easy to avoid details of stepson's unit and location. Making this bigger than it needs to be only adds to the problem.

[Lars39]

72. Sorry. This needs to be big. The harassers are the alienaters,

and probably law-breakers to boot.

[Columbia]

73. Apparently so if that is her objective

At the expense of her stepson's safety. As demsrule indicated before, he does not need to be worrying about this when his primary concern is to stay safe and come home alive. I would think that Mari333 would share this same priority.

[Lars39]

76. And what is your objective?

Never mind. I think I know.

[Columbia]

78. The safety of her soldier stepson

What did you think?

[Free_Thinking1]

66. And this lady who threatened is obviously an idiot

She doesn't have the power to have her son dishonorably discharged, she doesn't even have the power to get him a page 11. Yes she should be mad at the woman who called, but she shouldn't declare this to be the greatest military cover-up/scandal since Tailhook.

[Columbia]

54. Not too sure if you should take advice from someone who gets death threats

[RichardRay]

59. Try to take it easy for a few days

I am Vietnam era vet with parents who were active in opposing the war in Vietnam. None of the senior NCO's who knew about my folks' activities supported them, but all were respectful of their right to their opinion. If asked I was more than happy to explain that I shared my folks' feelings; that occassionally ended up with some more spirited discussions and I certainly was on the short end of some mild harrassment, but it was always pretty trivial.

It sounds to me like the SSgt's spouse is the one with the problem, and she's not in a position to cause your child any grief. She has pretty clearly abused her position in the support structure, though, so I wouldn't cut her any slack. OTOH, I wouldn't recommend raising any more dust with the army than you have already unless you hear from your child that he is being clearly harrassed. In that case you can take the gloves off and raise all the hell you can. You need a clear case of harrassment, though, otherwise you could end up making things tougher on him then they already are.

[Mari333]

62. agreed and I will back off if I hear from him and hes being treated well

but I will logically continue to pursue this woman's harassment scenario, so it wont happen again to someone else in my situation. Evidently, it often does, as Nancy Lessin assured me, to other families, and makes them afraid to speak out.
Thank you.

[Speed8098]

79. This really sucks

I've been following your story since before your stepson was shipped out.

There are some here that think you should be quiet. I think you are doing the right thing. I do agree with the Viet Nam vet who had outspoken parents. I think, if anything, he may be having some spirited conversations and light harassment, but nothing serious.

That said, this group that has contacted your UNLISTED phone number for the purposes of harassing you and your husband, needs to be exposed. In fact they need to be prosecuted.
Enough is enough.

I wish I could help somehow.

We're with you Mari.

[Zookeeper]

64. Mari,

Let us know when you hear from him again.

[Mari333]

74. I will. Look, I realize there are 2 situations here

one if that yes, my husband and I were harassed by a unit seargants wife and yes, she overstepped her bounds and threatened my stepson.
2. My stepson has not let us know whether he is being treated well or not well as we havent heard from him yet.
So I am just trying to take care of the first scenario, and make sure my son is protected by letting this woman know she had better not make waves . For all I know, her husband will be furious with her for doing this. I am just trying to ensure Michael's safety.
I read today where Abu Ghuraib has had 2 soldiers killed this morning, another wounded. Its very hard and terrifying to read that, right after these harassing calls, and then get no emails from Michael.
So forgive me, any of you who get upset with my stance, I am just tired and sort of at a point where there is very little energy left in me and my husband, who is in even worse shape then I am.
Thank you all for your input, I embrace it, and I hope this all works out.

[vetwife]

75. Marie...Please try and stay calm here is some advice

Please pick up the phone and call Carl Levin's office. tell him your concerns. Tell him that you would like a one on one appointment with him. Walk into that office proud and see what can be investigated. You should have access to a lot of things but military things should always be handled thorugh congress and senate folks. I tell you why. Like in the Lion King Movie...THEY GOT POWER ! whenever I tried to help a vet get his disability I always, always put it on a congressional level. You are in the loop for needing something done officially and it needs to be done through a congresioanl liason or the congressperson himself.

Nothing I am sure would make Sen. Levin happier than to help you. Please
write me at my email and I will try and contact Senator Harkin on your behalf or you call Senator Kerry. He has lawyers working for his campaign now and Veteran liasons including Former Senator Cleland who used to be Sec. of VA. Affairs. Stay away from Princippi or Rumsfeld and at this point USMJ. You just have to trust me on this call.

Your friend
Amanda

[Columbia]

77. Let me tell you a story

There was once a unit in Kuwait that had some members complain to congresspeople about staying there without a real purpose and wanting to be sent home. These Congresspeople made some calls to inquire why this was happening. The response they received was that these servicemembers had been sent on a mission to Iraq where they could be gainfully employed.

The lesson? Going to Congress may not be the smartest thing to do, they have little actual control over day-to-day happenings in the military and the military truly resents those who choose to go over their head.

[Insider]

80. opinion/experience from a veteran

the army has a great system for supporting soldiers and families. some people are misguided (sgt's wife) like any other organization/bureaucracy. that's unavoidable.

one of the biggest reasons they have such a strong system in place is for the safety of the soldier in a combat zone. if he/she is at all distracted, there can be very serious consequences for them or others.

so, IMHO, if the soldier is distracted (negatively, positively, etc), it is not a good thing. whether he is glad and distracted about what you're doing, or concerned and distracted, doesn't much matter. but if it is a distraction to him, or his sgt for that matter, it is not a good thing.

take it as you will, and best wishes on both situations. hoping for your son's speedy return.