Grandmother can't accept grandaughter's black husband

[CatWoman]

I had some very good girlfriends in the Army - two especially came to mind.

One was married to a black man, and her family disowned her.

The other's dad was openly hostile to his daughter's having black friends, yet he was married to an Asian woman.

Go figure.

(CBS) The whole purpose of Everybody Has A Story is to hold a mirror to society - to show us who we really are. And like any mirror, the story CBS News Ccrrespondent Steve Hartman found in Litchfield, Conn., shows us, warts and all.

Geraldine Spring was the one who answered Hartman’s call and she is quite an open book.

"I tell it like it is," she says. "And it's not really good to do it either. You can make enemies that way, too."

Pointing at one of the pictures displayed over her TV set, she says, "That's my grandson Travis, my favorite."

And yet Geraldine does have one thing to hide: It's a picture you won't find on display - a picture of her granddaughter's husband. It is a picture that embarrasses Geraldine so much; she keeps it buried in a drawer.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2004/03/24/hartman/main608462.shtml

[oneighty]

1. Yes Catwoman

A Beautiful couple with beautiful children to hug and kiss and love.Blood of her blood. How can she?

180

[supernova]

3. Calcified in the past

I have a lot of older relatives who felt that way in their time. I'm as white WASPy as they come. One of my cousins in law is black. My cousin Doris married him in the early 60s. Very taboo then and definitely caused a rift in that branch of the supernova family. But my aunt came to accept him in time, like about 20 years or so. :eyes: But better late than never.

I never understood it for the life of me, all that crap about "the races shouldn't mix," since I didn't hear a lot of overt racism from my parents growing up. Full disclosure: My parents were more of neglectful sort, not bothering to see, but not really hostile either.

Back to the CBS story. That guy must doubly annoy the crap out of her. He's a Dukie too! :7

[Skittles]

6. the past?

about five years ago I babysat a three year old little black girl for a weekend, the daughter of friends of mine. I was in a supermarket with her when a man walked up to me and said WHAT DOES YOUR FATHER THINK OF YOU? After I said EXCUSE ME? He proceeded to launch into a hate-filled rant about mixed-marriages. I was speechless and tried to get the little girl quickly away from the situtation. A couple of college kids who witnessed this event intervened and gave the guy hell.

[Quetzal]

7. I wish I was one of those college kids

I would have beat the shit out of him.

[Skittles]

13. lol

they did appear to be roughing him up a bit - they were big guys. I would have reacted entirely different had I not been responsible for a child at the time. :)

[DemBones DemBones]

17. A couple I know have several adopted children, all of them

Chinese or FIlipino. The mom told me about a time she was in a grocery store with a couple of her kids, including the then-newest baby, and another shopper looked at the baby and commented "She must look like her daddy."

Whether the shopper was racist or not, she was taken aback when told "I wouldn't know since I don't know who her father is."

:evilgrin:

[Quetzal]

2. "The other's dad was openly hostile to his daughter's have black friends,"

yet he was married to an Asian woman

I can somewhat relate to the situations you explained.

My 3rd generation Japanese-American friend currently has a black boyfriend. The parents are both Japanese. The mother didn't really care who her daughter dated, but the father was furious when he found out.

They both kept it from him for six months until the mother finally told him one night. He didn't necessarily disown his daughter, but he refused to meet with the black boyfriend. I don't even know if he will attend the wedding.

She is 19 years old now and may still dump him or not. The good thing out of all of this is that the father's hate did not pass on to his daughter. :-)

As for my grandmother, she is Korean-American. Her father was a Methodist Minister here in Hawaii and was well known throughout the commmunity. She ended up falling in love with a Hawaiian man who had dark skin. They both kept it secret from their families until he proposed to her. Whe she ended up telling her father, who was from Korea, he showed his dismay by not attending the wedding. It took a few years for her father to finally accept her spouse as a son-in-law.

[CatWoman]

4. small world

I'm black, and my aunt is Japanese. I was named for her.

I don't know if my uncle ever had problems with his in-laws -- they stayed in Japan and I don't recall them ever visiting here. But I've heard there's a certain stigma in Japan attached to Japanese children with black fathers.

[oneighty]

9. Catwoman

I spent three years in Japan. The children of black fathers and Japanese mothers are absolutely the most beautiful children I have ever seen.

Sigh..for what it is worth.

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[Cleita]

11. Actually, its any non-Japanese children of any race.

I have several Japanese friends. The wierdest one though is a Japanese national from a Samurai tradition family. (Her brother died as a Kamakazi in WWII). She married a Japanese American, born not too far from where I live now. Her family disowned her. Go figure.

[JitterbugPerfume]

5. my grand daughter has

a black SO He is a great guy! Boy, I feel sorry for that grandma SHE is missing out

[DrWeird]

8. Nobody's ever given me any shit...

when I'm with my black permafiancee.

But then again I'm 6'6" 280 lbs of freeper stomping progressivism. And my Ghetto Queen's tougher then I am.

[Cleita]

10. Sometimes they come around.

My best friend in high school married a Mexican American. I remember her telling me her mother and father told her that they wouldn't accept any half-white grandchildren in their house. They both refused to attend the wedding, but the rest of her family came to show support.

Well, she accepted not only my friend's half and half kids, but her other daughter's racially mixed kids as well. It seems grandchildren often make a difference. Last time I saw them they were a very racially blended family. By the next generation African Americans and Asians had been added.

[NNN0LHI]

12. I live in a very racist small town. Everyone knows everybody

The most racist guy in town had a daughter who married a great black guy and they have 3 beautiful kids now. You should see grandpa doting over these kids. It is a sight to see. He loves them more than he loves life itself. Just thinking about it puts such a smile in my face. Really.

Don

[CatWoman]

14. that's a very sweet, comforting post Don

:hi:

[Sandpiper]

15. This attitude is not uncommon

Amongst Tom Brokaw's "Greatest Generation."

My own grandmother, a life long Roosevelt/Truman Democrat, would have a stroke if any of her grandchildren married a black person.

[DemBones DemBones]

16. People are weird. Back when I was in junior high,

my Southern-born and bred mother had a couple of "friends" who were Enlightened Northerners. They had a lot to say about racism in the South.

Then my older brother and his family came for a visit. He was a Marine and had married a Filipina-Eurasian while stationed in Hawaii. At the time of this visit, their son was maybe three months old and quite adorable.

The Enlightened Northerners' sense of racial tolerance was sorely tested by that visit. My brother's son was my mother's first grandchild and her "friends" didn't even want to hold the baby.