"If Jesus saves, then he better save Himself....."

[kentuck]

.."From the gory glory seekers, that use his name in vain..."
Jethro Tull circa 1972..

Yes, we can invade another country and kill innocent people because we are a righteous and Christian nation. Isn't that right, Jesus?

Yes, we can steal from the poor and needy and give it to the wealthy, because it is the people's money. Isn't that right, Jesus?

Yes, we can lie and deceive in the name of executive privilege and because we have honor and integrity. Isn't that right, Jesus?

Yes, we can do all those things that Jesus said was wrong because we have been baptized and we are saved. Isn't that right, Jesus?

Jesus looks down at the ground and walks away.

[DarkPhenyx]

1. Jesus is coming back, but he isn't a carpenter this time, no way.

He's going to be a sheet metal worker from Queens and it'll be like.

*Sha-Boom*

"That's right I'm back, and I'm goddamn pissed off! The first person I want to see is Jerry Falwell, get his ass down here NOW!"

- with great thanks to Robin Williams

<on edit>

I also like this bit. Concrete Blonde from Bloodletting "Tomorrow Mary is Going to Die"

I told the priest
don't count on any second coming.
God got his ass kicked
the first time he came down here slumming.
He had the balls to come
the gall to die
and then forgive us.
No, I don't wonder why
I wonder what he thought it'd get us.

[Az]

2. If the real Jesus Christ were to stand up today

He'd be gunned down cold by the C.I.A.
Oh, the lights that now burn brightest behind stained glass
Will cast the darkest shadows upon the human heart
But God didn't build himself that throne
God doesn't live in Israel or Rome
God doesn’t belong to the yankee dollar
God doesn't plant the bombs for Hezbollah
God doesn't even go to church
And God won't send us down to Allah to burn
No, God will remind us what we already know
That the human race is about to reap what it's sown

Armageddon Days Are Here Again - The The