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i thought gays were smarter than to want legal marriage

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mopaul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:03 AM
Original message
i thought gays were smarter than to want legal marriage
i mean, 'regular' marriage laws are sheer hell when things go wrong and become divorce. can't tell you how many divorce horror stories i've heard from men and women all my life. why would anyone, straight or gay, want to head into that dark realm?

sure, there are benefits to legal, same sex marriage, but you'll have to take all the ugly aspects too. alimony, property, legal fees, etc.

i've been married to a wonderful woman for over 30 years, and a good marriage is a glorious thing of course. but, as a philosopher genius and deep thinker, i wonder, is there really any such thing as marriage?

look at it for what it is. two people, (traditionally 1 male, 1 female,) make a public statement that they are together forever allowing no other person to come between them. this is fine in the purist sense, but in contemporary society, there are lots of rules and regs and lawyers and men of the cloth and mother's in law, and endless trouble when the abstract institution of marriage morphs into divorce.

people in general rush into marriage without thinking things out.
usually they are in the throes of passion and excited and shiny and happy. then when the honeymoon is over, and things aren't so shiny anymore, and kids come along, and others come between you.....hell is unleashed. as are lawyers.

i personally do not recommend marriage to ANYONE. it's a hard thing sometimes, takes a lot of work, years to refine and reshape. too many people get horny, and mistake lust for love and before you know it, boingo,....divorce. it all goes to hell, and the kids suffer.
if i had my druthers, marriage would be an abstract, ideal, rather than a legally binding contract, ultimately decided by lawyers and judges.

a warning to homo and hetero sexuals: don't sign anything until several years have gone by and you can stand things like dirty underwear and pain in the rear en-laws.
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Loonman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:05 AM
Response to Original message
1. Archaic societal conditioning custom
Is it a civil union or a religious one?

For legal purposes or ecclesiastical ones?


Who knows, who cares. Most modern societal mores are as archaic as they are non-sensical.


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Rowdyboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:10 AM
Response to Original message
2. 15 years with one man and his dirty underwear...
I have no interest in marriage (I look awful in silk and Belgian lace) and wouldn't walk down an aisle holding daisies and babies-breath even if I could. That's just not me.

However, if anyone is foolish enough to want to, they should have the right...

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mopaul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:11 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. i agree
they SHOULD have the right
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Liberal Veteran Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:12 AM
Response to Original message
4. After 13 years, I would gladly marry my lifepartner....
If nothing else, it would simplify a lot of matters like the fact that trying to get me onto his insurance (I am losing my job) is a hassle that wouldn't exist if I were his spouse.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:13 AM
Response to Original message
5. Your own refutation is in your own statement
You said "i've been married to a wonderful woman for over 30 years, and a good marriage is a glorious thing of course." No one has a guarantee of a good marriage but everyone deserves the chance. Period. Thats it. No more need be said.
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mopaul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:15 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. again, i agree
but i'm of the school that thinks people marry without thinking things out and cause tons of trouble and make billions for the marriage and divorce industries.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:18 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. On that I agree as well
The vast majority of marriages are entered on horrible contexts. People are made to feel as though they are not complete without a partner. Some are made to see success as being defined by marriage instead of looking to what they really want. Some confuse lust for love while others are searching for a story book marriage and invest no work in keeping the relationship viable.

Even still, to deny anyone the chance to make a try at this mountain is horribly wrong.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:14 AM
Response to Original message
6. LOL
there was a letter from some guy in the Dallas Morning News the other day - it said LET THE GAYS GET MARRIED. LET THEM SUFFER LIKE THE REST OF US.

I don't recommend marriage either. :D
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-08-03 09:18 AM
Response to Original message
8. I would suggest one systemic change in the marriage system
It should be extremely hard to get married and extremely easy to get divorced. Now it is just the opposite. People can easily get involved in a legal binding union and have to go through hell to get out of it. Just a thought from one who is hanging on those vows of till death do you part, 30 years later. I told my wife, whom I truly love, that I would kill her before I divorced her because the penalty was lighter.
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