Republican National Convention Schedule

[Poiuyt]

Someone sent this to me:

REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE - CONVENTION SCHEDULE -
New York, NY

In case you are wondering whether to attend the
convention, here's the agenda:

6:00 PM Opening Prayer led by the Reverend Jerry
Falwell

6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance

6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd
amendment)

6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing

6:46 PM Seminar #1: "Getting your kid a military
deferment"

7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong

7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries

7:40 PM EPA Address #1: "Mercury, it's what's for
dinner"

8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next

8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh

8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: "The homos are after
your children"

8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights
(MEN only)

8:50 PM Seminar #2: "Corporations - The government of
the future"

9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' That Man"

9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong

9:10 PM EPA Address #2: "Trees - The real cause of
forest fires"

9:30 PM Break for secret meetings

10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas

10:15 PM Lecture by Carl Rove: "Doublespeak made easy"

10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration of how to squint and
talk macho

10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark "deer in
headlights" stare.

10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory
kevlar chastity belt

10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black
republicans

10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong

10:50 PM Seminar #3: "Education - A drain on our
nation's economy"

11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Piñata

11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft:
"Evolutionists - The
dangerous new cult"

11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again.

11:35 PM Blame Clinton

11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies

11:50 PM Closing Prayer led by Jesus Himself

12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme
Planetary Overlord

[rebel_liberal]

1. LOL..... Too Funny!

The scary thing is that it is probably not that far off the mark :-(
Buncha rightwingnuts!