What will the eulogy be for bush when he dies?

[Oddman]

And now we say so long to a c- student who somehow became the president of the United States and divided our country, sent it to war, racked up a record deficit we are all still paying off, set the world against us, destroyed our environment and lost in a landslide to John Kerry. May he rest in pieces.

[malatesta1137]

1. I hope Michael Moore

delivers it.

[NewEmanuelGoldstein]

13. word life

The eulogy I would deliver,

"He wasn't as big a cocksucker as people thought he was. He was a selfish opressive little man who thought God told him to kill peace. May God bless your soul, sir."

[dand]

25. He was a humble man, and rightly so.

[trof]

29. "He has a lot to be humble about."

Who said that? Churchill?

[nadinbrzezinski]

2. You surely remember the eulogy for Nixon, don't you?

In fact, you also remember the massive State Funeral.

You don't? Neither do I. I suspect that if things
continue going further down the road of Constitutional
Crisis we are already in (the media needs to be clued in)
his burial will be as low key as they can manage, just
like Nixon.

Oh and Nixon... he was a piker compared to Bush... a mere
amateour... truly

(Oh and boys and girls the case is laid down in...Worst than
Watergate by John Dean, extremely well)

[RummyTheDummy]

5. Nixon didn't have a state funeral

NT

[Pachamama]

24. And neither will Dubya...even my 4 yr old knows he's evil... n/t

[coloradodem2005]

14. Inquiry.

What exactly does piker mean?

[nadinbrzezinski]

16. Dictionary definition

Main Entry: pik·er
Pronunciation: 'pI-k&r
Function: noun
Etymology: pike to play cautiously, of unknown origin
Date: 1872
1 : one who gambles or speculates with small amounts of money
2 : one who does things in a small way; also : TIGHTWAD, CHEAPSKATE

And Nixon, compared to these boys, did things in a small way....

[Solly Mack]

3. Perhaps they'll use the prison chaplain

[Career Prole]

4. Step right up...play "Dunk a Dead Dope"!

"Three throws for five dollars! Step right up!"

[Oddman]

6. Yow!!!!

[Jim Sagle]

7. "He wuzn't nuthin' but shit when he wuz alive, and he ain't nuthin' but

shit now that he's dead."

[Cleita]

8. Did the cat forget to cover THAT in his box?

I jest. I'm sure I won't be that calloused when the moment comes. Hopefully, we won't even hear about it after his jail term. It will be a small item on the obit page, a "remember whom?".

[RummyTheDummy]

9. It should begin something to the effect of......

Dear Lord, forive him for the crimes he committed against humanity....yada yada yada.

[FleshCartoon]

10. Here was a man...

...who wore his religion on his sleeve and took his presidency as a mandate from God.

In his lifetime, he learned to avoid pretzels, segways, bicycles, ciccadas, umbrellas, and terra ists.

He hated brown-skinned evil-doers, but loved white-skinned ones.

He stayed the course, but, of course, he can now no longer stay.

Play ball!

[Sparky McGruff]

39. Close, but not quite...

The correct ending should be...

"... Now watch this drive!"

[TheWizardOfMudd]

11. The Eulogy will be for Bush

Did you mean something else?

[koopie57]

12. bring some ice and wear shorts

george you old bastard, it is hot where you are going.

[neebob]

15. Maybe some self-aggrandizing opportunist -

hopefully not one of his successors - will showcase his incredible jealousy and self-centeredness with a series of observations contrived to compare himself to our dear departed Dubster. Then he'll top it off with a ridiculous fantasy about how, when Smirking George delivered some famous stupid line, the dissidents and prisoners in the gulags were tapping to each other in code about what the American pResident had dared to say. And while most of the people in the audience will be picturing it or thinking yeah, that could have happened, a few will wonder how the dissidents and prisoners learned of this bold and historic statement.

[Norquist Nemesis]

17. Three little words...

Praise the Lord.

[Sugarbleus]

18. THBBBBBBBBBBBBB! That's it! eom

[LibertyorDeath]

19. This is Woody Allens I think

Bush eulogy

Sooner or later something like this was bound to happen.

[jokerman93]

20. One imperative sentence.

"Don't ever let this happen again."

[Rosco T.]

21. Ahem... perhaps someone will sing a song .....

The Hell Of It
by Paul WIlliams (Phantom of the Paraside soundtrack)

Roll on thunder shine on lightnin' the days are long and the nights are frightnin'
Nothing matters anyway and that's the hell of it
Winter comes and the winds blow colder well some grew wiser you just grew older
And you never listened anyway and that's the hell of it

Good for nothin' bad in bed nobody likes you and you're better off dead goodbye
We've all come to say goodbye goodbye
Born defeated died in vain
Super destruction you were hooked on pain and tho' your music lingers on
All of us are glad you're gone
If I could live my life half as worthlessly as you
I'm convinced that I'd wind up burning too

Love yourself as you love no other be no man's fool be no man's brother
We're all born to die alone y'know that's the hell of it
Life's a game where they're bound to beat you and time's a trick they can turn to cheat you
And we only waste it anyway and that's the hell of it

Good for nothin' bad in bed nobody likes you and you're better off dead goodbye
We've all come to say goodbye
Born defeated died in vain
Super destruction you were hooked on pain and tho' your music lingers on
All of us are glad you're gone

[FleshCartoon]

27. Wow.

I always loved that song--didn't know anyone else even knew it. It would be a good one for Dim Son.

[Mojambo]

22. No, no... the line to piss on his grave is over THERE.

This is the beer line.

[IHaveADream]

36. LOL!!!

[Forkboy]

23. "We lay this fuckhead to rest...let's go get a beer!"

[fujiyama]

26. May fhis office

never see the likes of that man ever again.

And then, I would announce support for an ammendment that would ban anyone related to the Bush family from becoming president.

And with that, I go to Forkboy's statement about the beer.

[John_Shadows_1]

28. Uh, Uh, Uh, fool me once, shame on, uh, uh,..

.... fool me twice, you , uh, uh, you won't get fooled again!

[JimT]

30. Triumph speaks:

"A great president...for me to poop on!!!"

[IHaveADream]

40. Dog puppets rule!

[PfcHammer]

31. Here lies a disruptor. He disrupted poorly. n/t

[Oddman]

38. Love the sign!

Worlds #1 Terrorist!

[neebob]

32. Honestly, though

I'm afraid Bush's eulogy and everything that goes with it will be just like the national week of obscenity we have all just endured. Watching all the lying and fawning over this callous old bobblehead who did NOTHING worthwhile really illustrated for me just how gullible and stupid many of my fellow Americans really are. Meanwhile, the news disappeared and Bush practically jumped on the casket and shamelessly compared himself to the fake superman that is now Reagan, and no one said anything. Remembering how long it took to begin to repair the damage that Reagan did, seeing how quickly time can be turned back and it can all be undone, and noticing how easily most people can be made to accept lies and others to shut up, I'm not feeling very optimistic about the future.

[Proud2BAmurkin]

33. "A twice defeated former Texas governor"

nt

[kcwayne]

34. Mr Executioner, you may throw the switch now

well, that's the preview to the eulogy. The eulogy will be "Please mark prisoner #4558073 as deceased in your records. That will be all."

[IHaveADream]

35. Wouldn't that be a fitting end?

Especially if it took place in Texas!!!

[FizzFuzz]

50. lolol perfect!!!

[wellstone_democrat]

37. At DU, many will bitch about "being better and kinder"

in our messages about the departed.

Not me, I'll be by MoPaul's side reminding everyone of Bush*'s atrocities

edit: error in syntax

[Texican]

41. Any Last Requests

before the war crimes tribunnal's sentence is carried out?

[Oddman]

42. Yeah - like "What would you like for your final meal?"

Kinda creepy . . .

http://www.deadmaneating.com/


A Pathetic Excuse for a pResident

[mopaul]

43. "He croaked'.. get him outta here, he's stinkin' up the place"....n/t

[lanparty]

44. We greatly regret ....

... that we don't have the technology to dig a whole to the center of the Earth. We could have saved a more honorable person the trouble of dragging your soul to hell.

[mockmonkey]

45. It should be in "w"s own words and

read by Norm Crosby.

[vetwife]

46. There is an old saying in Texas, I mean no I am sure its

Tennessee (Hell) Fool me once, and you know the rest ! or the whole thing could be eulogized by Michael Moore and Now that would be justice ! or place a golf ball and tee placed on the coffin, pull out a 9 iron and say "Watch this drive" Or we could just have Baker sreaming We are taking this higher up, we want another count....we are sure his number isn't up ! Fuzzy Math !

[randr]

47. Do you remember Nixons'?

Me either!

[greatauntoftriplets]

48. Hate to say this and throw water on the party.....

..but it'll probably make last week look like amateur hour. Praises will be heaped upon him and I will :puke:

[Mike Niendorff]

49. "Prisoner #24470 died of a pretzel-related injury last night."

"And the Federal Penitentiary just won't be the same without him."


MDN