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As Wesley Clark gets sworn into office, Americans happily reflect on the eight glorious years of the Bob Graham Presidency. Bob Graham has caught Osama bin Forgotten, and bin Forgotten has been prosecuted in the federal courts and now sits in a Crawford, Texas prison. Indeed, the Western White House of George W. Bush has been converted to a compound for persons convicted of war crimes. bin Forgotten and W. are the only occupants.
Under President Graham, more lands become federal property than ever before, and summer vacations are spent by families in the beautiful protected lands of America. Secretary of the Interior Arianna Huffington has successfully banned SUVs from America, and the Graham administration has thus created the cleanest American environment in decades.
Millionaires cry at Graham's new 40% tax bracket, but the middle class prospers and Graham's gradual universal health care process has finally come full circle.
The new Secrecy Czar--Carol Moseley Braun--has ensured that the federal government's dealings are public and well-known to all Americans. And indeed, Graham's administration is a refreshing change after the secrecy of Dubya.
"I vowed to make America cleaner and safer--a better place to live. At the expense of the top one percent of taxpayers, we have paid off the deficit. Yes, my friends, we did it! We have made America the exact place that we want our grandchildren to inherit."
And with that, Bob Graham departs the White House. Integrity has returned to Washington. Americans have a government to be proud of once again.
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