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Pathetic. Really.
Any Freepers who might advise me in getting started in writing? Mish Mash ^
Posted on 10/15/2004 4:02:20 PM PDT by explodingspleen
Greeting, all. :) I'm an aspiring humorist, and wonder if I might get some feedback on just a few paragraphs of the beginning of a story.
I actually launched a website a couples weeks ago with the goal of getting feedback; but, alas, 'twould seem I don't have enough visitors (if I have any).
So I thought I'd hit up on some of my fellow freepers for some feedback.
I really only recently gotten in to writing much at all. And before I commit myself to any serious projects I'd like to know if I'm headed in the right direction.
If anyone might give me some pointers, it would be greatly appreciated: :) -----------------------------------------
Josh looked at the donkey pityingly. It stared back, quizzically, with big brown eyes. If things had been different, Josh supposed, he might have asked to keep it. But things being as they were, he could only cringe as the unfortunate creature exploded violently. In seconds, a dozen voracious toddlers swarmed over the remains, stripping its candy innards like African fire ants attacking an injured wildebeast.
Today was Todd's birthday, and Todd's father was presently explaining to him the perks of turning 18.
“You mean the American government has trusted to I, Todd Skalawak, the power to elect it's leaders and so determine the nation's ultimate fate? Hahaha! What naïve saps!”
There is something you should know about Todd. He is passing through one of those rebellious “phases” psychologists love to talk about so much. You know, a totally non-sensical world perspective based entirely on fanciful adolescent notions, like believing in the tooth fairy or voting Democrat*. Todd's phase was that he was evil. He liked to do evil things like torment small animals, beat up homeless people, and compute integrands without using a constant of integration.
“Ha, you dastardly integrand! I have incorrectly particularized your general solution yet again!”
See?
“Todd would you take out the trash?”
“Oh, woe is I, Todd Skalawak, indentured on the annual commemoration of my natal day—a mere one three-hundred-and-sixty-fifth of the earth's immortal venture around the sun—to perform acts of menial servitude for those I had supposed to love me. Alas, I am but mere--”
“Cut the crap and take out the trash.”
“Yes, mother.”
Todd read his Word-A-Day calendar quite regularly—it was part of his plan to take over the world. Well, after he had taken out the trash, anyway. One had to keep a sense of one's priorities.
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So that is what I'm starting with, with the hope of making a full-length book (unless y'all think I have no hope as a writer :p). If you're interested in stuff I've actually completed writing here's a short story, a poem, a script , the beginnings of a libretto(ok, that's not really completed), a satirized version of Hamlet.
Of course, I would be quite content just with general suggestions from those who have experience writing. The links are just there if anyone's interested.
Advice?
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