HAHAHAHA!! Oh, those silly little freepers!

[Vektor]

Some less than brilliant author has written a satire of a day in the life of a DUer!

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1312795/posts

HAHAHAHA!
What horse shit! I HATE frozen burritos.

But - I totally love how we are ALWAYS drinking and smoking weed and vomiting!

Oh well...those crazy misinformed freeper kids!

[Skittles]

1. it's like O'Reilly thinking we're all a bunch of slackers

total horseshit

[Vektor]

4. Especially...

The stereotype about Dems being "poor and on welfare" and Republicans being rich. Anywhere I have ever lived, the Dems are the better educated ones with the higher income level. The uneducated, socially disadvantaged ones tend to vote Republican, because they have had less schooling, and are easier to brainwash into that way of thinking...

Look at the red southern states. Look at the poverty level...look at the voting trends. Do the same with New England, and the Pacific Seaboard...hmm...wealthy, educated, BLUE.

I guess it makes them feel better thinking they are part of an elite class we all envy, but don't belong to.

HAHAHA

[Skittles]

10. just try not to sound too snobby

in Texas I work with highly educated professionals and they are just as easily fooled and brainwashed as the lesser educated folk - they actually think Bush is a good leader, all evidence to the contrary.

[Vektor]

15. Wow!

Those poor people...to think they believe in this douche of a President.

[LynnTheDem]

26. Ain't easy being "poor and on welfare" and "elitist"

at the same time.

Ain't easy being as ignorant as a freeping rightwingnut, either.

Morans.

[No Exit]

30. Who cares what Bill O'Pervert thinks?

He'll say anything to keep his prominent post at Fuxx News, the channel with the 24-hour pornography. (Ann Coulter alone is pornographic enough to make that channel not fit for children to view.)

[Vektor]

73. mAnn Coulter?

Eeeewww...not interested in emaciated tranny-porn.

[No Exit]

74. LOL... so did they ever explain

why her Adam's apple is so visible... ?

[Vektor]

75. Maybe she was frenching Shrubbie...

...and he gave her his pretzel.

[Mr_Spock]

81. Manthrax Coutergeist to be precise.

:D

[Solly Mack]

2. Jealous of the weed are they?

I guess if all I had to smoke was homegrown skunk weed, I'd be jealous of those who got the good stuff too. Maybe if they actually had friends they could find the better quality. You can always tell the adult who was the unpopular kid...they still try and tear the popular people down.

[itzamirakul]

3. I don't waste one valuable second of my day...

reading a damned thing that those poor excuses for intelligent life might post.

[Vektor]

5. Sorry - I couldn't help it!

It was so funny because it describes the typical dumbass Bush voter.

[itzamirakul]

9. To each his own

:)

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

22. Really. Time can be better spent doing more important things.

Like taking a shit.

[Vektor]

55. I'll get right on that.

I prefer to take a shit WHILE reading freeper manifestos. If helps my bowel to release.

[Lone_Star_Dem]

6. Well, at least now I know why I vote democratic.

It's my lack of education combined with the fact that I live in a trailer and eat frozen burritos bought with food stamps.

I'm glad that was explained to me. :eyes:

Truthfully, that sounds like 2/3 of the republican population were I live. Luckily, many of them were unable to vote due to their felony probation.

[Solly Mack]

8. They do project

Sometimes, I just want to take my thumb and fore-finger and squish their little heads.

[Vektor]

12. Exactly!

What I have been saying all along. No educated person I know of, who has anything to his or her name, votes Republican.

You'd HAVE to be high on weed, and drunk, to vote for Shrub.

[nine23]

7. Jeesus. How dull. As boring as their Photoshop "skills"...

To think some obese, lonely wanker living in a trailer spent three hours on THAT. Usually, I like going over there to check out the redneck neurotica (I'm not American; it's like a trip to the zoo...); that simply wasn't worth the visit.

[Vektor]

13. HAHA!

"obese, lonely wanker living in a trailer"
That is hysterical.
Also, likely pale, pimply, and oily-skinned, beating off to photos of Condi in her figure skating outfit.

[ET Awful]

11. Hmmm, I work over 12 hours a day, don't smoke anything, don't drink

. . . . how clueless are these muttonheads?

[Vektor]

14. Not sure...

It must boost their self-esteem to pretend we are like that. If they knew we are all a bunch of well-educated professionals who own homes and have money in the bank, they might actually have to WORRY. They like to pretend that liberal women are all ugly and hairy, too. THAT IS A GOOD ONE!!! That must also be why I get hit on DAILY by stupid rednecks with Bush stickers on their pick-up trucks.

They love it when I tell them I am a Massachusetts-born liberal who was a Kerry campaign volunteer, and is also French.

[Historic NY]

16. Joe Republican

"A DAY IN THE LIFE OF JOE REPUBLICAN"

Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air.

He walks on the government-provided sidewalk to subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union.

If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

It is noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. Joe also forgets that his in addition to his federally subsidized student loans, he attended a state funded university.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards to go along with the tax-payer funded roads.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans.

The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."

[Vektor]

17. Of course!

I have seen this before. They wrote that idiotic story as a response to this one. Just like they did that ludicrous "we're not sorry" website in response to sorryeverybody.com.

If those fools could come up with an original idea...JUST ONCE... that they did not steal from a Democrat, I'd shit my pants.

[cire4]

18. Nicely done

That sums up the Freepers perfectly...

[nine23]

19. Brilliant, NY...every single line is truth as we know it.

However, if you don't mind, I'd rather stick with my own imagery...that of an "obese, lonely wanker living in a trailer", wallowing in his own filth and self-hatred.

An equal truth as I know it, if you will...

[Matariki]

20. hysterical! and oh so true. n/t

[lowela]

21. Well done!

You've expressed what we need to keep reminding those of, who are so happy to take what others have worked so hard for. Just like the easy support for our troops with their yellow ribbons. If takes getting out of the recliner and getting off their fat asses or paying their fair share in taxes then they're too lazy to contribute.

[comsymp]

25. Right you are-

Their yellow-ribbon patriotism and Falwell brand of Christianity make it pretty obvious that any action beyond paying lip service is alien to these great Keyboard Warriors. What was the most successful Freep that these pinheads ever pulled? Eleven? Twelve?


http://209.157.64.200/focus/f-news/827026/posts

[MADem]

82. Ah, yes, those YELLOW RIBBONS

Made in CHINA...where Joe Republican's JOB will be going before too long, if the weecowboy has his way in his continued pillaging of our economy. Then, after hurrying to sign up for that evil liberal unemployment compensation, Joe can cry his eyes out, and wipe away his tears with a hanky made by the Chinese textile industry, which is wiping the floor with our gasping industry. Then, he can get back into his Indonesian-made recliner, watch Faux, and be convinced that if only a few more Republicans were elected, all would somehow be well...

[OneTwentyoNine]

23. Har!! Geat....Joe also gets to spend time with his family because...

some lazy,slacker boy Liberals in the 30's demanded a 40 hour work week to replace the Republican required 80-100 hours,seven days a week or lose your job type of work force.

[maxrandb]

27. Wow! Is This Copywrited?

I'd love to cut and paste this. It would make a great LTTE, or even a guest column. Our local paper let's us submit editorials sometime.

This is something that needs to be pasted and e-mailed, and faxed all over the world.

[Historic NY]

42. It made the e-mail rounds back before elections.......I didn't know

who the source was. I checked again apparently it is attributed to Michael Moore.....then again there are several others too...

http://www.tvnewslies.org/Day_in_The_Life_Of_Joe_Middle1.pdf

[bunkerbuster1]

58. obviously, the freeper in the OP is attempting to rebut this classic.

pretty sad, huh?

[peekaloo]

31. Excellent.

:toast:

[Liberal In Texas]

35. Excellent

And well written as opposed to the freeper's juvenile drivel.

Also, one thing that always puzzles me, is where do they get the idea that democrats aren't mostly capitalists?
Oh, wait, I remember. Probably the mind control programming from the hate-mongers currently dominating AM radio, et al.

[WillyT]

60. Absolutely, Wonderfully, Brilliant !!! - THANK YOU !!!

:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:
:yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock::yourock:

:bounce:

[WilliamPitt]

77. Best. Post. Ever.

[livinginphotographs]

24. So being a member of DU allows you to sit around smoking weed all day?

When was someone going to tell me? Do they let you know when you hit 5000 posts or something? Are the mods going to email me, or will some random helpful DUer come to rescue?

I've been posting at DU from work for far too long, when I could be sitting on my ass smoking weed!

[librechik]

34. sshh--quiet, or the newbies will find out! n/t

[WoodrowFan]

36. we were going to tell you but

sorry dude, we were going to tell you but I think we forgot man.

[Vektor]

50. I prefer the pot brownies....

That DU sends you when you hit 10,000 posts!

[MattBaggins]

84. I gotta get typing..... NT

[Vanje]

86. All I got was this little star

When are they going to send me my grass!???

[JHB]

28. Projection is such a terrible thing...

...yet they keep doing it.

Must be addictive.

[Vektor]

53. They can't stop themselves!

They'd have to realize it's themselves they hate, then it would get even uglier.

[nascarblue]

29. Did you see this one??

Here's a gem...

They believe that "redneck America" is too stupid to vote. That they vote for Republicans because they don't know any better ("it's not in their best interest") and because they are racist/sexist/bigoted/homophobes. Since they lost the popular vote AND the electoral vote this time (and are unable to play by the rules at the polling centers, like being registered TO vote), I could see a dominant Democrat Party abolish voting. They've said as much in their sour grapes rants this time around. Some called for secession.

They want total control (even when they push for socialist-anarchy, they want to be a part of the group that determines which social services will still be around and how they will be funded in a world with "no" government.

[Vektor]

52. I love their Unabomber type manifestos!

Always good for a laugh!

[heidiho]

32. Any group whose leader is a cocaine-snorting, whiskey-swilling

idiot son of an asshole can't see reality when it bites them in the ass.

[Vektor]

51. They're so numbed up...

They probably can't feel it either!

[Hunter_1253]

33. That is funny

I'm a young suburban professional, married, a college grad, my wife is a college grad with a masters, and generally fit the description of a regular Joe Citizen. No drugs, no booze (only socially), saves money to invest for my future (no debt outside a mortgage), and am waiting for the birth of my first child in a few months. I’m living the American Ideal. It's just because of this damn conscience of mine and the feeling that all people, not just white Judeo-Christian Americans, deserve basic freedoms and rights that I can't possibly vote Republican, and therefor am a Democrat. That stupid conscience keeps me from acting like one of their “true” Bush Americans.

[Vektor]

49. Oh, you foolish, foolish idealist!!

<mock shock>

How could you think such a thing?? :-)

[Ravenseye]

37. MMMM Frozen Burritos.....AAaaahhhhhhhhh

seriously.

Who's with me? If I could eat frozen burritos every day I would. Any kind of frozen burrito, the shitty big bag ones or the fancy whole foods ones. I don't care. Just throw them in the microwave for a few minutes and smother them in Habenero Sauce....

mmmmmmmmmm.

I KNOW I'm not alone here on this point.

[Vektor]

48. Admittedly...

They are a little better when heavily sauced. And when they have actual ingredients, and not just "meat paste."

[A Simple Game]

87. Not a burrito person,

but I have been known to hit the snooze bar a few times.

[DS1]

38. As I slipped my now flaccid penis out of my sister, I realized that

today was the day I was going to make a stand and wipe out this liberal vermin that is infesting MY country! Racking a round into the chamber of my rebored and custom-tuned pre-ban AR-15 with 20x scope and match-trigger kit, I pulled my cammies back up around my waist and gave my belt a quick cinch.

Slamming home the latch on my Humvee, I drove West towards the big city, already judging what kind of wind I could expect atop the Space Needle. Those goddamn latte-drinking crossword-finishing liberal pukes are gonna pay, today, Jeb's gonna make sure of that himself. I reached back into the bag of snacks for those long trips I take on the highway and pulled out my MRE freeze-dried peaches. Lucky for me my boys in the local militia taught me how to eat them without water. We're hardcore. Real fuckin hardcore, we're so hardcore the Green Berets won't even take our phone calls. Yeah, bad-fuckin-ass!

(continued)

[RandomKoolzip]

41. Now that's funny....

Except there's no vaguely sexual subtext when you talk about your guns.


Oh, no wait, there is:

Racking a round into the chamber of my rebored and custom-tuned pre-ban AR-15 with 20x scope and match-trigger kit, I pulled my cammies back up around my waist and gave my belt a quick cinch.

My bad. Good job, DS1!

[NightOwwl]

44. Holy Crap! Give me some kind of warning next time!

I'm at work for god's sake!

Now excuse me while I take a 5 minute bathroom break to wipe the tears from my eyes caused by laughing so hard.

[Vektor]

47. I'm on the edge of my seat!

More! Ahhh..what a saga..

[0007]

64. My mind's eye captured the picture right after ......I read..

...."Lucky for me my boys in the local militia taught me how to eat them without water." I could see the boys spitting and spit bouncing back like rubber balls. That's how tough these guy were indeed!

Thanks for the chuckle, man!

[Sparkly]

39. It missed a few rightwing-scripted stereotypes

The thing is, they don't all work together. We're supposed to be on welfare and hate rich people, yet when they go for that, they miss characterizing us as intellectual elitists sipping chardonnay in the hot tub, for example.

Also, didn't the hippie-phobia go out thirty years ago, along with phrases like "The Man?"

I think this person is simply working on the sequel to Reefer Madness -- in the 30s, pot made people laugh and play the piano really fast; now, it makes us all laugh, play the piano really fast, and have wild orgies of POSTING ON DU.

But wait -- we're all jobless and poor. Who can afford pot? Oh well. Pass the chardonnay. ;)

[DS1]

40. I'd comment on that, but I'm too busy chomping down my food-stamp

provided Brie ;-)

[Vektor]

46. Right!

I personally love the "hippie high on weed" stereotype myself!

[Name removed]

43. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Vektor]

45. Please see the rules on ...

"Newbies and calling them out!"
And, my post count isn't that low, plus it's quality, not quantity that counts.

I'm pretty friggin witty if I do say so myself.

If you don't like, don't read..you have that right.
And don't get huffy with me because the Freepers are full of shit. I can laugh at them. And I am. So are a lot of others. I choose to laugh heartily at these idiots rather than let them get to me.

So gimme time. My post count will be above 1000, and then I guess I can put down anyone else on DU right?

[lies and propaganda]

54. I couldnt even make it to the end....

Guy could have done a better job if he had enlisted the help of my twelve year old sister. what a tool.

I or someone else must have been puking. Rich.

[Vektor]

56. That was pure...

...literary genius!
*gag*

[MaraJade]

57. Oh WOW!

:wow:


I just love the meticulous use of grammar and spelling, don't you? I'm simply dazzled by this fine display of intellect!

Why, those freepers are just a fount of sagacity!

*goes back to smoking weed. . .*

[bunkerbuster1]

59. The pluralization of "tsunami's" - classic

I'll ask again--what is it about RWers and the tendency to pluralize with an apostrophe? Honestly, nine times out of ten when you see this usage abomination, it's in the hands of a Freeper.

Gotta be some reason for that. Or "reason's"...

[Vektor]

61. Well...they are an "Ownership Society" you know...

Hence the possessive form of EVERYTHING!

[bunkerbuster1]

62. Brilliant!

Why didn't I think of that?

[Vektor]

68. Maybe you...

Have been eating too many frozen burrito's.
:-)

[northzax]

63. how is it you are all missing the truely amusing aprt of this?

wherever this "geroni" lives (Irving Texas, maybe? which would be in the Central Time Zone, he/she has no problem posting at 11:52 PM PST, and then five hours later. Anywhere in the United States (surely such a patriot wouldn't live anywhere else?) this is the middle of the fucking night. Fun parody to think of a guy staying up all night on the web, and mocking others, huh?

maybe it's Comic Book Guy?

don't defend yourselves, people, they aren't listening, just laugh.

[dean_dem]

65. Because you know, freepers NEVER drink...

or use profanity or smoke weed or accuse the Mainstream Media of bias. It's just us crazy commies. Riiiiight.

[atommom]

66. And of course they've posted a link to THIS thread.

I was going to say something caustic about them, but I just realized that it's almost cocktail hour. Gotta go .... :toast:

[Vektor]

69. Good!

They need to see how absurd their stupidity is to all of us. Maybe they'll give it up and go do something constructive. Like go adopt and care for the crack-addicted, HIV positive, premature baby of a prostitute so she doesn't have to seek a safe, legal abortion.

Hi Freepers!!
xoxoxo
:hi:

[Goathead]

67. I would imagine that GeronL posts at DU as well.

Hey, why aren't you in Iraq GeronL, you piece of shit.:hi:

[David Zephyr]

70. Why Won't The "Liberal Media" Report on the F.R.'s Blatant Racism

Interesting that the NY Times and the media have a good time with the DU while ignoring the blatant racist, sexist, homophobic posts, many of which call for violence against Muslims because they are Muslim.

Why won't the American press report on the posts at the F.R. which is frequented by national Republicans?

They are afraid to.

[bobbyboucher]

71. Uhhh, that won't be necessary, but thanks for bringing it in.

Why did you bring it in?

[Vektor]

72. Bring what in? n/t

[DS1]

76. Oh don't worry about him

;-)

[Vektor]

79. I just don't know what he's talking about. (????)

The post doesn't relate to anything...maybe he was trying to communicate with someone else?

[Pepperbelly]

78. He must have read Creative Writing for Dummies ... nt

[MADem]

83. And the lacerates ran down his cheeks, maybe??? n/t

[Geek_Girl]

80. I Guess that was a freeper

Attempt at Being Funny and Clever. That's why the funniest comedians are liberal. It actually takes intelligence to be witty.

[quiet.american]

85. Deja vu

There was a conversation between myself a couple months ago and a freeper where he let loose that all Democrats did drugs, have long hair and are not religious.

I've never done drugs, will admit to somewhat long hair (but am a woman, so I consider that one a draw) and have regularly attended spiritual services for over 10 years.

Guess who is a recovering drug addict, showed me a photo of himself back in the day with waist-length hair, and never goes to church -- oh, and like me is former military, BUT supports AWOL Bush above all -- and considers himself more American than me!

Pass the Kool-Aid.

[Piperay]

88. Hahaha sounds like

the description fits more repukes than any Democrats. x(

[tngledwebb]

89. Why are they so intimidated by DU?

I think they must be jealous, perhaps latent DU'ers?