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Edited on Tue Jan-04-05 03:09 PM by fryguy
For instance, here's what I'm thinking they "gave":
:bounce:
Bush - offered to go on vacation to Phi Phi and "clear brush"
Ahnold - personally groped all female Swedish survivors; called all male survivors "girlie-men" for not saving people
Cheney - dispatched Haliburton and KBR workers to the region equipped with check-books from the Federal Treasury (thus avoiding the need to issue no-bid contracts and let them write checks to whomever they wanted and for as much as they needed without any oversight)
Frist - tort reform
Jeb - gallantly flew over the wrecked landscape and then put into place officials to rig elections in Sri Lanka, Indonesia, and Thailand
Georgie Sr. - a thousand points of light
Rove - nothing (he's still spiting up venom from the election)
Rumsfeld - poignantly explained that even though 150K+ people had died, and millions more are homeless, people have to live with the country they're assigned to, not the country they wish they could live in
Condy - offered to re-rename the Altair Voyager back to the Condoleezza Rice, fill it up with with water and send it to the region (all went as planned, until Exxon's drunk ship captain rammed the tanker into a reef, spilling millions of gallons of fresh water into the ocean)
Ashcroft - knelt in prayer and then raised the Terror Alert system to orange, citing credible intelligence that "Sue Nami" might be planning on striking the US next.....
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