...I am unable to confirm a rumor I am trying to start that Fox News is considering hiring Spc Charles Graner as a commentator and pinch-hit host should he be acquitted of abusing prisoners at Abu Ghraib. This would indeed be a controversial talent pick, one that would no doubt earn head-shaking disapproval from the graybeards in the Old Media. But Fox News feels that Spc Graner has proven that he is one tough dude who knows how to get the dirty job done, which plugs in nicely with the cable news channel's angry white male demographic. The way he cocked his thumbs-up at the camera after forming naked Iraqi prisoners in a pyramid demonstrates the sort of can-do attitude America needs to fight the war against terror without losing its sense of humor.
Well, I can see their point. He and Oliver North might make quite a team, bouncing around in a jeep together. Of course, if Graner is convicted, this will all be moot. Cable news is a fast-moving medium and can't afford to wait for a future prospective host to be released from prison.
http://jameswolcott.com/archives/2005/01/chronic_abusers.phpWolcott's snark is so graceful- like a character at a cocktail party in a glam screwball comedy.
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