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Couples wedded to lasting covenant (ties that really bind)

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BleedingHeartPatriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:26 AM
Original message
Couples wedded to lasting covenant (ties that really bind)
Edited on Sun Feb-06-05 10:26 AM by BleedingHeartPatriot
Sealed with vow of "I'll be there" Christian participants view the "covenant marriage" movement as a way to cut divorce rates.

By Eric Gorski
Denver Post Staff Writer

After 15 years as husband and wife, Larry and Lorrie Russell decided that wedding vows with the standard line about "till death do us part" were not enough.

The Denver Christian counselors had a strong marriage. But was it a covenant marriage, an unbreakable pact before God, transcending earthly laws?

snip>

The idea of saying "I do" - and then some - is gaining momentum with evangelical Christians who view covenant marriage through a dual prism: as a confirmation that marriage should be between one man and one woman, and as a call to responsibility, a way for born-again Christians to reduce divorce rates that mirror society's.

snip>

"Radical times demand radical responses," said Dennis Rainey, executive director of FamilyLife, a Little Rock ministry that stages marriage- strengthening conferences. "The covenant of marriage has basically been raped of its meaning. It's easier to get out of a marriage than a contract for a used car."

snip>

Actually, I tried to get out of a contract for a used car...not so easy. Anyway, the latest and greatest from the "moral values" crowd.

MKJ

edited to add link.

http://www.denverpost.com/Stories/0,1413,36%257E23827%257E2695225,00.html
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ernstbass Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:28 AM
Response to Original message
1. Born agains divorce rate is higher than rst of society
so I guess they need to try something!
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Bridget Burke Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:35 AM
Response to Original message
2. It sounds as though they're already having problems.
Those vows before God to stay together "till death do us part" aren't working, so they're looking for stronger magic.

They might be better off getting a marriage counselor.
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zanana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:36 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. There'll be a rise in the murder rate.
Alot more dead women and kids.
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blm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. I'm afraid you're right.
.
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:49 AM
Response to Original message
5. I'm quite confused
These couples are so incredibly commited to their marriages that they are planning ahead of time what to do when one of them has an affair?

And their commitment is so strong that they feel the need to use tax dollars to rewrite laws to force them to stay together, because unless they are forced to, they are afraid they won't want to stay together?

I'm going to consider this a brilliant satire. I can't wrap my head around the other option.
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bullimiami Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:50 AM
Response to Original message
6. absolute bullshit.
if people arent going to be faithful no promise or paperwork is going to resolve it.

there are faithful and unfaithful boyfriend/girlfriends, lovers, partners, married couples and now married+ couples.

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Hugin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 10:54 AM
Response to Original message
7. Headlines of the future: Adultry rates at over 50%.
Bring back Henry the XIIIth...

"Confused kids want to know why Mom isn't Mommy."
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The empressof all Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 11:08 AM
Response to Original message
8. 1st class and 2nd class marriage
What some folks won't do to feel superior. I guess my 20 year old regular marriage just isn't good enough any more.
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chefgirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. Exactly what I was thinking
This is no different than the idiots who wrap themselves in flag clothing, or wear TWO flag lapel pins, just to prove they are more patriotic than other people.

Now they're attempting to draw a line between married and 'more' married.

I guess its always harder to actually live by their principles than to buy themselves a piece of paper or tiny little flag pin for proof.


-chef-
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BleedingHeartPatriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
9. Apparently this is still a hard sell, even in red states...
Edited on Sun Feb-06-05 11:12 AM by BleedingHeartPatriot
snip>

Couples sign contracts agreeing to premarital counseling and promise to seek more counseling if things go sour. Divorce is allowed only in cases of abuse, abandonment, adultery or a felony conviction. Even then, a 2 1/2-year waiting period is necessary. Arizona and Arkansas approved similar provisions in 1998 and 2001, respectively.

But the response hasn't been what supporters had hoped. Louisiana boasts the highest participation: about 1 in 50 new marriages, or 2 percent. In Arkansas, 600 couples have chosen covenant marriage in the last three years out of about 40,000 marriages a year. In Arizona, where a looser law allows couples a quick divorce if both spouses agree, participation is 1 percent.

snip>

Yet again, the fringe extremists trying to impose their will on everyone. MKJ
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Swamp Rat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
11. This is so silly
Covenant marriage=Marriage for adults with adolescent personalities. x(
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LWolf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Feb-06-05 12:03 PM
Response to Original message
12. I don't know how you legislate commitment.
I don't think it can be done. What does successful marriage take? I'm just guessing, since I've never experienced one:

*commitment
*integrity
*unselfishness, ability to compromise and cooperate
*realistic expectations
*ability to love unconditionally, without the expectation that you can change a partner, or that a partner will somehow change, or be different, for you
*awareness and understanding of partnership, especially permanent partnership?

How do you legislate that????

It would be far better, imo, to address the problem culturally. If all kinds of partnerships were equally honored, and children weren't raised to expect that they need to be married to be happy and fulfilled, perhaps we'd have fewer, better marriages. And more solid, more productive, if temporary, partnerships of other kinds.

That happens, not in the legal system, but in the system of cultural values.

It also doesn't really matter what the legal or financial penalties of divorce may be, if the cultural value system supports it.

How many people who have cheated on their spouse and/or abandoned their families are still supported by friends and family? Who really looks at the trail of personal destruction stretching out behind someone when they show up at the party free to roam, or with the new trophy spouse?




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