Weird news from Holland

[dutchdemocrat]

Culled from the quirkies at ananova.com

****This one presents particular problem in the age of Dutch PC...****

Smoking to be banned in Amsterdam coffee shops



Smoking is to be banned in Amsterdam's famous coffee shops where cannabis is sold without fear of prosecution.

Under a new public smoking ban, coffee shops will still be able to sell joints but customers may have to go outside to smoke them.

Holland's new national health guidelines, due to take effect from the start of next year, were aimed at second-hand smoke from tobacco, not marijuana.

But they are also threatening the liberal Dutch drugs policy which attracts tourists from all over the world.

"The whole point of going to a coffee shop is to smoke," complained Arjan Roskam, chairman of the Union for Cannabis Retailers.

The head of the Dutch anti-smoking lobby, Clean Air Now, conceded that banning smoking in coffee shops was not the goal.

But Willem van den Oetelaar still backed the move. "It's not our priority, but it is a good thing," he said.

The Netherlands boasts around 800 cannabis cafés, the first of which was opened in 1972. The sale of marijuana remains officially illegal in the Netherlands, but its use has been decriminalised.

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****Here's another corker from my turf here in Holland... Sex on Terms, or Credit Sex....****

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Escort service offers call girls on easy terms

A Dutch escort agency has opened a credit line for customers who want to pay for girls by installments.

The Blue Diamond Escort service came up with the offer to try to drum up extra business.

A spokesman said: "We are no charity organisation. It's pure business. If there is more competition, you need to come up with something new to keep your clients.

"And that rule is as true for selling sex as it is for selling laundry machines."

Customers pay a premium of an extra £10 an hour for the credit service, reports De Limburger.


Story filed: 10:29 Wednesday 25th June 2003

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****Crime in Holland takes a peculiar swing with this one. Not quite Texas here in the land that gives you weekends off from jail if you are doing less than two year's!****

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Armed robber gave himself up after police didn't show

An armed robber gave himself up in Holland after he got sick of waiting for police to come and arrest him.

And when he finally walked into the police station, he had to show his gun to prove he was a criminal, reports De Telegraaf.

The man held up a shopkeeper with a gun in Amsterdam and told his victim he'd wait for the police in a nearby park.

He waited for half an hour but no police officers showed up so he walked to a police station and gave himself up.

At first, the police officer on duty didn't believe his story as the shopkeeper had not yet reported the robbery.

Finally, the 38-year-old produced his pistol and was arrested.

A police spokesman said the robber was homeless and wanted to be arrested so he had somewhere warm and dry to sleep.


Story filed: 09:56 Monday 14th April 2003

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****It even get's a little wilder****

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Disabled man can't find a willing prostitute

A disabled Dutch man who is allowed to claim a monthly sex allowance can't find a willing prostitute.

He should be reimbursed by his council for any money he spends on sex workers.

But he says he can't find a prostitute who will give him a receipt.

The man said the prostitutes are worried about declaring taxable income to the government according to De Telegraaf news paper.

The man fought a seven-year battle to win a 1997 court ruling and is allowed to claim a maximum of £100 a month.

He said visiting a prostitute means he has to use less medicine and that each visit gives him peace and rest.


Story filed: 11:48 Monday 11th August 2003

[Bandit]

1. I like the Dutch. They seem to have their priorties right.

:thumbsup: to the Dutch

[cprise]

3. "The whole point of going to a coffee shop is to smoke,"

Well, no.

Some potheads don't like the fact that it still produces dangerous second-hand smoke. They can't see past the debate on legalization of the drug.

[Devils Advocate NZ]

6. If you have a problem with second-hand smoke...

perhaps you should stay out of shops where the whole point is to go and smoke?

As far as I am concerned, second-hand dope smoke is called a freebie!

[demnan]

2. Must be a hell of a fun place over there

:-)

[jonnyblitz]

4. I will be over there Nov18 til mid December staying in Amstelveen

one of my sisters has a house there..I have been in Europe several times but never there. Looking forward to it!

[histohoney]

5. Some people< (my self included) have

a reaction to canabus. While I lived in Santa Fe, I would try to go to outdoor events, ones that stated they were non-smoking. (The cops don't bother you for just a joint or a little pot, they just come down on the sellers.) Sure enough someone would light up a joint, and I'd have to pull out my inhailer.
What you do in YOUR car or YOUR home, I could care less, but out in public we need to be aware of others (That goes for MY perfume use). :smoke:

[IrateCitizen]

7. While what you are saying has merit OUTDOORS...

... the argument hardly stands up with regards to Dutch coffeeshops.

People go to coffeeshops to smoke. If you don't want to be around smoke, then don't go to a coffeeshop.

If they were to ban smoking at coffeeshops, then people would be smoking outside -- which would lead to just the situation of which you speak.

[newyawker99]

10. Hi histohoney!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[rman]

13. a coffee shop is not "out in public".

if you don't like smoke, 2nd hand or otherwise, why would you go to a coffee shop?

this smoking ban also goes for 'normal' bars, restaurants etc. that would make more sense then to ban smoking in coffee shops. but those get several years to come up with plans for non-smoking areas, which is obviousely something else than a ban on smoking. apparently a non-smoking area isn't good enough for a coffee shop.

part of the plan would be to sell pot at tabacco stores.

it seems the point of the current (religous, conservative) Dutch government is to eliminate coffee shops all together. but they don't want to come out and say that.

[IrateCitizen]

8. dutchdemocrat, your country was my favorite from this summer's trip!

My wife and I honeymooned for a month in Europe. Of the 31 days, we ended up spending 10 in Amsterdam (2 separate occasions). It is, hands down, the most picturesque city I have ever seen. Walking the canals and looking at the narrow house fronts was quite often like stepping back 350 years in time.

And the bikes! My God, the bikes! We could not get over seeing people in business suits, mothers with 2 kids, women in skirts and heels -- all riding bikes everywhere!

But more than anything we loved the attitude of the Dutch in general. It seemed to be a "do what you want so long as you don't hurt anybody" kind of attitude -- something that we here in the US could go a long way toward adopting!

Both my wife and I agreed that, of all the places we visited (Holland, France, Switzerland and Italy), that Holland was the one place we could see ourselves living in. Three cheers for the Dutch! :bounce: :beer: :smoke:

[dutchdemocrat]

9. I have lived in Canada for a spell

But I now live in Groningen in the North. Our 'Martini'clock tower dates from something like 1100 AD.

You should see my bike! I have two kiddy seats on it. One on the handle bars in front of me and on the back!

[DemExpat]

11. Hi, Groningen, The Hague here.....

I saw one newspaper headline today state that the planned smoking ban in cafes and restaurants has been put on the back burner for an indefinite period.

I truly love living here as well! With all its faults and problems.....

I tell everybody that as far as I can see, Holland is the best little country on earth to live in right now. Scandinavian countries are probably a close second!

:hi:
DemEx

[dutchdemocrat]

12. Hi Hague

Sure is. I am happy having flip flopped between Canada, St. Maarten and Holland over a lifetime. I didn't catch the news.

Crappy weather today though... My first winter after 7 years in the Antilles!!! AHHHH!

Glad to be home though.

Groningen.

[IrateCitizen]

16. And let me guess -- it's one of those "1955" models...

with the white paint on the back fender, just like everyone else rides! :D

Can you clue me into how you all tell your bikes apart? My wife and I couldn't figure it out the whole time we were over there! They almost all look the same!

[dutchdemocrat]

19. I saw something funny the other day

Some guy competely painted his bike... EVERYTHING - in red. Tires, Chain, handlebars.

I think he must of gotten drunk or something and lost in the Grote Markt (Square in town), wandering endless around looking amongst thousands of bikes in the pouring rain.... late at night...

Next day bought spray paint. Problem over.

The city of Groningen is the bike capital of the bike country. It is unbelievable how many bikes there are here.

There are more discarded bikes on the streets than coke cans I'll bet.

Oh... and I have a "Gazelle" - which frankly does not look like a 9000 dollar Trek but has all the joys... proper side saddle shopping bags, good tire protection and chain cover so as not to get sprayed... two kid seats (yes three of us on the bike) and three gears. There are no hills around here!

[dutchdemocrat]

20. If you can't tell them apart

you are fucked. It's a bit like trying to find your 1980's red Honda Civic after a ball game in a parking lot full of red Honda Civics.

You have to remember where you parked it.

They steal bike like crazy too. That may derive from the failed and rekindled White Bike program from the 60's where they put thousands of bikes on the streets of Amsterdam for people to share and they all got stolen or lost in the canels eventually...

At any rate we are trying again... WHITE BIKES RULE!

'White Bikes' Return to Amsterdam
AMSTERDAM, Netherlands (AP, 10/30/1998) — The idea was a simple one: Improve society with the bicycle.

In the 1960s, concerned students painted hundreds of bikes white and placed them around Amsterdam for people to use. They hoped to conserve energy, decrease pollution and provide free transportation to those in need.

It didn't work — thieves snapped up the bikes within weeks. But the utopian idea refused to die. Three decades later, the "white bike" is about to roll back into town, this time armed with computer chips designed to track its every move.

Beginning early next year, 750 high-tech white bikes will be gradually introduced to the streets of the Dutch capital. One glance at the futuristic bikes in organizer Luud Schimmelpennink's cluttered harborside office makes you realize this isn't your grandmother's Schwinn.

With its thick white pipes, low-riding frame, scooter-like handlebars and solid crayon-colored wheels, the whole thing looks like a child's Big Wheel built in reverse.

But the childlike appearance belies some serious anti-theft mechanisms. The thick pipe holds microchips used to store information about riders, and special wheel prongs make an electronic connection to bike racks — a connection broken only when the user inserts a computer "chip card" into the rack.

"It's not a very personable design," Schimmelpennink said. But it's a recognizable one, should someone attempt to repaint a white bike, and its unique design makes it pointless to try pilfering it for parts.

In a similar program in Copenhagen, Denmark, 1,500 clunky "bycykels" are unlocked from coin-operated racks. When a bike is returned, so is the coin.

Amsterdam's ingenious and irrepressible thieves would make quick work of a coin- operated system, said Joef Huffener of the city's transportation agency. "Every penny would be stolen," he said.

By relying instead on computer chips, Amsterdam can keep better track of how bikes are distributed around the city. The Dutch program also includes a 30- minute limit, a lesson learned from the Danes, who often end up stuck waiting at empty racks.

If the plan succeeds, organizers hope to peddle it to other European cities choked by traffic and air pollution.

But even in bike-friendly Amsterdam, where bicycles already far outnumber cars and cycling paths line every major avenue, Schimmelpennink acknowledges the white bike faces an uphill ride.

Last year alone, even though many Dutch cyclists spend more on locks than bikes, 100,000 bicycles were stolen in Amsterdam. During a test of the white bikes last summer, people tried to tear them loose, prompting designers to reinforce the racks.

Skeptics have been quick to voice doubts in a program that has already failed once, and they say the restrictions on the white bikes will make their everyday use impractical.

But Schimmelpennink, one of the original '60s protesters, hopes '90s technology will give new wings — or, in this case, wheels — to a mode of transportation beloved for its simplicity.

"The cost is great for society," he said. "A town loses so much with cars... Town life is dead with too many cars."

[sushi]

14. Interesting, sad, and funny stories

I like Holland. One of my sisters lives there. When I visit I stuff myself with poffertjes. I also have a few trinkets from Van Moppes.

[VermontDem2004]

15. sigh

sometimes I wish I lived in Holland. :evilfrown:

[IrateCitizen]

17. Well you already live in the People's Democratic Republic of Vermont...

So it's only a small step from your current socialism to the full-blown communism of Holland! :evilgrin:

[VermontDem2004]

18. I live in Arizona

I actually never been further west of I-25 in Colorado. VermontDem=Howard Dean 2004=I want him as President in 2004 but would gladly accept someone else.

[dutchdemocrat]

21. Does this make sense?

Politician calls for kindergartens to be set up in OAP homes


A Dutch politician is calling for kindergartens to be set up in old folks' homes so pensioners can watch over toddlers.

Economy minister Herman Heinsbroek says it would solve a childcare shortage and help teach children traditional values at the same time.

Mr Heinsbroek says there is a long waiting list for existing kindergartens and that red tape is stopping them recruiting more staff to expand.

He told De Telegraaf: "Grandparents are used to watching their grandchildren quite informally. Maybe we can now organise it on a formal way and even give them some money to do it."


Last updated: 11:02 Friday 20th September 2002

[dutchdemocrat]

22. Bwaaahahahahaha!

Dutch police congratulated for stealing people's cars


Dutch police chiefs have congratulated officers for stealing cars drivers left running while they went to the shops.

The two officers in Tilburg drove off on three separate occasions in cars left with the keys still in the ignition.

They drove the cars for several hundred metres while their owners gave chase on foot. They gave the cars back.

A police spokesman said: "They wanted to prove how fast a real thief can get away with a car."

The police chief told Limburgs Dagblad: "They scared the hell out of the drivers. They'll certainly be more careful next time."


Last updated: 11:25 Saturday 17th August 2002

[dutchdemocrat]

23. OK this is the last one... I just had too....

Family from hell get own housing estate - still unhappy


A family from hell in Holland have been given their own housing estate so they can't bother neighbours.

The local council in Maastricht is spending £1.5 million to put the Krijnen family in houses of their own.

The family will live in four homes on an isolated estate of ten houses on the edge of the city. The other houses will be left empty.

The Krijnen family consist of five households, notorious for stealing, violence and causing nuisance to neighbours.

Thier current homes are being knocked down.

But the family are upset because their new houses are next to a prison.

Head of the family, Peer Krijnen, 56, who himself has spent 18 years in jail, said, "You can't force criminals to live near a prison in the few times they are free.

"We want a decent house in a nice neighbourhood," he told De Limburger. "And we are going to get it, even if we have to go to the European court in Straatsburg."

Jan Meissen, spokesman for the council says the family cannot be housed in a normal neighbourhood.

"They steal the tiles from the roofs of other houses; instead of growing tomatoes they grow hashish in the garden, they just do whatever they like, when they like and nobody can stop them. They just have to move."


Last updated: 13:34 Sunday 20th January 2002

[Greyskye]

24. Back to the original article...

The thing that I think many non-Europeans may not realize, is that in Europe it is standard procedure to mix pot and tobacco in the joint.

When I was last in Amsterdam, about 5 years ago, I saw a sign in a 'coffeshop'. It was a listing of pot/tobacco ratio's commonly used in different countries. At the bottom of the list was:
America - 100% pot! Crazy Americans!

Well, call me crazy, but if I were to hypothetically indulge in some self-medication of the hempen variety, I would rather not dilute it with tobacco!

[dutchdemocrat]

25. Well...

In Holland it is different.

We love our tobacco first off. Drum, Vanelle... etc.

Our tobacco normally comes in a bag, not in a pack. We roll it Ourselves and the tobacco is does not contain any weird Monsanto inspired additives and is quite pure.

In other words we don't smoke 'cigarettes' per say. We smoke tobacco joints. I have seen little old ladies who remember the 'war' engaging in acts of criminal rolling at bus stops that would have them in Gitmo if they lived in Texas.

Yup, nice wholesome Dutch mothers rolling up at the crosswalk... teen licking papers after school, grandpa twisting on the park bench.

Now some in Europe feel this is the ultimate signal that the Dutch are too cheap to buy pre-rolled (better known as ciggies) and they have a point. The Dutch basically talk about how little they spend about 80 per cent of the time... I live here I can attest to that. I am half Dutch myself... You know I was at Aldi today - and it IS MUCH cheaper than Albert Heine...

Oh sorry, let me digress.

So we have a culture who enjoys tobacco in a more natural state.

Now I have seen North Americans fresh off the plane who find themselves in a cultural heaven for smokers, but they don't know how to smoke.

Dutch people don't even know what roach clips are. That ingenius little clippy thing, usually adorned with some coloured feathers ripped off a poor bird, or with a freaky ceramic handle shaped like a medieval creature or whatever....

We don't use them here. We neatly tear a little piece of cardboard usually from the flutje (paper) pack, niftly create a tight little funnel, then slip it into the small end of the baseball bat of a joint.

Mixed with hash, pot and Drum in most cases.

Why mix?

It burns better. One.

Two, you don't get those weird situations of intense swapping with a pinner on a roach clip and 15 guys all thinking, "man he's smoking too much".

Three... in Holland most of the time when a group of friends smoke up, they all spin and fire up these bombastic cannons made from Kingsize papers at the same time and still share... each creating their own 'blend' of the marijuana experience. The average time between passing is sometimes five tokes or more. And not little pinner pucker mouth puff... no. Nice easy deep warm drags.

Sometimes they don't even bother passing... and no one cares.

All this while playing chess (a national pastime in the coffee shops) usually.

I don't smoke by the way. But I have in the past!