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If Tony and Cherie are looking a bit down in the dumps at the moment, forget Al Qaeda, war against terror, Iraq/mythical WMDs and that uncomfortable business of a public enquiry into Dr Kelly's self-predicted demise 'among the bushes'.... Reports in the UK press state that their wholesome chum Carole Caplin, Mrs Blair's massage artist, haute couture consultant and lifestyle guru was busted last April by a government security sweep which confiscated her Downing Street swipe card, depriving her of the sort of security clearance normally given to bona fide VIPs and positively-vetted government personnel. Initial reports suggest that Ms Caplin's considered advice to Tony to wear a purple coloured suit to dinner with Chancellor Schroeder was the final straw precipitating in her being stripped of easy access to No 10. A few weeks later, the Blairs' mentor and former employer Lord Derry Irvine, the Lord Chancellor, was eased out of office and had his prospective tenure of a top freebie job at Cambridge University blocked. Conspiracy theorists need not start salivating yet - a simple DNA test for Caplin and Irvine would speak greater volumes than any deep analysis of their political leanings.
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