Dear Mastercard:

[PDittie]

This is to inform you of a change in our credit agreement. It has come to my attention that you are unable to keep my credit and debit card information safe.

*snip*

Effective May 1, 2005, any compromise of my data will result in a $50 liability for you, the card issuer, owed to me, the card holder.

Cashing the payment check I sent you last month (which you did) shall constitute your acceptance of this agreement. Subsequent security breaches will compound the fee. I will spell out the terms of just how much these fees and related costs will escalate as soon as I find a typeface that is small enough.

Failure to comply with these changes will result in finance charges, compounded monthly and based on the average daily balance of the amount lost to fraud.

*snip*

Also, given the widespread nature of the security problems, I am going to share information with my fellow consumers. If I determine you failed to secure their private account information, I may be forced to enact the terms specified in this agreement even though you did not violate the agreement with me. Call it universal default in reverse.

http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssistory.mpl/business/3235757

[sendero]

1. Great idea...

... but $50 is a joke. It should be $1000 :)

[indy_azcat]

2. i'm going to put that in my 'awesome' file. I wonder if any lawyer-types

could actually find any ground to do any of this satire IRL.

[sendero]

4. Truly....

.... I'm emailing links to this article, it's as funny as it is reasonable. :)

[unblock]

5. two problems

(first, i'm not a lawyer, but i play one on du.)

1) when credit card companies propose to change your terms, they offer you a way out by cancelling your card. any balance you are carrying remains at the old interest rate and terms, and you still pay it off with the old minimum payments, etc. you just can't make any new charges without implicitly accepting the change in terms.

so, to do what is proposed here, you would probably have to offer the credit card company to cancel your card in lieu of accepting your new terms. in practice, them cashing your check won't do, because this is automated and no one reads such terms. maybe a certified letter would do, i don't know. if i were the credit card company, i would simply cancel the account without batting an eye.

2) in practice, good luck enforcing this. good luck even finding a lawyer willing to go up against a credit card company for the sake of a $50 fee. even if you find a pro bono publicity hound to take your case, it would be an uphill battle. they would probably offer something small to settle quietly, but once it goes public, forget it, as they wouldn't want anyone else to think this kind of stunt would pay off.

[indy_azcat]

6. I'm sure the CC Co.s have EVERY contingency covered

in the fine print. I'm pretty sure it says they have the right to change the terms of the contract at any time w/o forewarning (although you're right about grandfathering it in). Still, a class action or even a small claims suit over the $50 liability bit would be something fine to see.

:sigh:

[Bluebear]

3. cc: Sen. Biden

nominated!

[Senior citizen]

7. Every time I pay off a credit card, they give me a false payoff amount,

so that instead of a zero balance and a closed account, I always end up with a small credit balance. It ALWAYS takes them several months to refund that balance. I ALWAYS demand that they pay me the same interest that they charged me. They NEVER do. I think a good class action lawyer could make a few million off of this one. While each classmember might only get a few dollars (the interest on their credit balance during the time it was not refunded, plus a couple of bucks compensation), the combined amounts would add up to a lot of money and the percentage for the attorneys would be worth it.

[PDittie]

8. On this guy's blog he talks about someone who

keeps moving his debt around to the zero-percent offers to avoid paying any interest:

http://blogs.chron.com/fulldisclosure/archives/2005/06/credit_card_shu.html