Wadded up newspapers in a crappy motel abortion. (the flipside)

[SoCalDem]

5 unemployed, broke teenage college students financed not one, but TWO back-alley abortions...

The year was 1968.

My roommate became pregnant, and was scared to death. we had NO MONEY (we were all college freshmen). She was adamant about telling her parents so we set out to fundraise, while she and her boyfriend checked out the underground word-of-mouth abortion 'system'...

By the time we got together the $400 we needed, she was already 3 months along and starting to show a bit. She stayed at college instead of going home for Thanksgiving because she was sick, and did not want her parents to question her. Two or three of us stayed behind to keep her company at the abandoned dorm. We had to make up stories to even get to stay there over the holidays...

The plan was to have them drive to a nearby state to the south of us, and there was a medical student who would perform the abortion at the $10 a night motel on the outskirts of town...The medical student took her to the room, and the boyfriend was told to wait in the car...He refused and stayed with her through the ordeal.The student poked and prodded, and gave her three pills to take.He told her she would feel bad for a few days, and would then miscarry.

She bled for a few days, and was sick but after a few days felt better. She went to class and went about her normal business, but she was still throwing up.Nothing of any consequence was expelled. We took her to the student medical center, and they asked if she might be pregnant. She did not tell them about the abortion, and they ran a pregnancy test. A week later she got a card from them, saying she needed to "stop in" for a follow-up appointment.. Yep.. She was still pregnant.

She went to the first appointment, and came back to tell us the news..

Now we had to raise more money. We sold stereos, gave haircuts, did laundry for guys, and washed cars. you name it..

The next try was to the state north of us, and because she was now almost 5 months, the cost was $600. It was another motel .. But the gallows humor was still with us. We commented that this time would be different because it was a "Best Western", and would cost $25 a night.. We took that as an omen.

We managed to raise the money, and off they went again.

Remember. no one had cell phones, and long distance calls were not in the budget.. we only had one phone per floor in the dorm, anyway, and it was a crapshoot to even get a call.. We might as well have been in Timbuktu..

4 days went by before they arrived back, and this time she was obviously in bad shape. Feverish, and lethargic. We had to take her to the hospital.. She spent a few days there and had a D & C.. Everyone knew she had had an abortion, but they called it a "miscarriage"...

We rarely spoke about the ordeal. When she finally opened up and told us, it was amazing that she survived.. The "med student" was a DENTAL student, and used dental instruments :eyes:.. He shoved wadded up newspapers in her to "absorb" the blood..

She almost died..

The irony is that the guy she got pregnant with was a relatively "new" boyfriend whom she only went out with at first, as a favor to me. He was the roommate of my boyfriend, and was the one with a car, so I always tried to fix him up, or my boyfriend and I were on foot.

They became close during this ordeal. He stuck with her through it all, and they have been married for 36 years.

The extra irony. She was far enough along to know that the fetus was a boy, and they went on to have 5 daughters. Karma? Who knows..

This is the "future" that young girls can look forward to if things change...

[bluestateguy]

1. Rich girls will be able to avoid all of this

If she lives in a red state, she can hop a plane to a blue state, or to Canada or the UK. As usual, it will be the working class that is unable to get a safe abortion.

[SoCalDem]

2. The sad thing is that her parents never knew and they could

have afforded to send her to a safer place, but she was so ashamed, and Catholic, that she would rather risk dying, than to tell them:cry:

The republicans love shame (when it's not THEIR shame)and this is the goal they are after.. Make girls grovel for help.

[Cleita]

17. I don't blame her. As a Catholic back then, she

would have been sent to a place like St. Anne's home for unwed mothers. If a wedding couldn't be arranged between her and the father, she would have been arm twisted to give the baby up for adoption. Abortion would never have been even considered as a possibility.

[wli]

3. better do it before you show

They're sure to ban traveling for the purposes of abortion. The ban might even go nationwide given the phenomenal election fraud capabilities of the American Taliban.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

4. My husbands tells me

that two girls in his high school class in Texas died as a result of botched abortions. Your friend was lucky that she could even have kids after her ordeal.

The thing we need to make clear is that we aren't in favor of abortions, but of CHOICE...and that if abortion is chosen, it should be safe.

[SoCalDem]

5. I think that if we had not taken her to the hospital when we did,

she might have died:(

[Ruffhowse]

6. A good reminder to all parents with teenage daughters that it's important

to have a conversation with them that you will support them whatever their decision is concerning an unexpected pregnancy and will always be there for them. They should always feel they can come to you for help in these situations. Of course, the best conversation to have with them is about birth control in the first place (as long as we still have that option. I'm very concerned that if the Religious Reich get abortion banned in this country, birth control will be next on their agenda).

[SoCalDem]

15. Lots of parents cling to the idea of the virginal daughter

and the "atta-boy" lady-killer" son. For every daughter that is open with her sexuality (to her parents), there are probably 15 who "go along with the charade", and are as surprised as anyone when they pop up pregnant.

[grannylib]

19. It's already under attack, by the RR and the pharmacists and all...

next thing you know pharmacists won't fill prescriptions for the Pill, or for drugs made by any company that makes the Pill, or whatever...it's under assault already, sure as you and I are talking about it, and it's all about re-subjugating women. Women who can control their reproduction have some control over their lives, and we don't want THAT....husbands should be the heads of households, and mommies should be home and barefoot and pregnant, and everybody should pray in public schools (Christian prayer, naturally, what other kind is there??) and the Ten Commandments should be displayed, but who cares if they're FOLLOWED....

What a world. We're in for it if this little fucker gets an anti-Roe nominee confirmed...it'll be back to coathangers for the poor.

[SoCalDem]

20. At my first "grown up" job, I was asked what birth control we used

and whether I planned to have a baby soon.. People are not allowed to do that anymore, but the repubes are insanely interested in the private parts of women:eyes:

[XanaDUer]

7. The so-called right-to-lifers

are more interested in punising women than helping children.

They sicken me.

[DanCa]

8. There are times when abortion is a medical necessity

such as resulting in the death of the mother or paralysis of the mother. There are sick freaks out t here who think rape victims are asking for it and what to see the women relive the rape until the cell is evolved to term. Xanaduer I agree with you one hundred percent.
Jesus said dont be a scribe or a pharisee. He knew there were exceptions to every rule. And I personaly believe the only say so a man should ever have is just to tell the women no before sex. It takes two to make a baby after all. Ever here of male responsiblilty people?

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

9. A moving account thank you. Don't think that karma though is just about

abortion. My father's sister became pregnant back in the 30s and gave up a baby girl for adoption. She wound up getting married and had 4 boys. She died never knowing her daughter.

A couple of years after she died my father was contacted by a woman who was looking for her biological family. It was his long lost niece, whom my parents now have a relationship with.

[SoCalDem]

12. What's really crazy is that she never even questioned the

"medical student" when he told her that "newsprint was sterile", and she'd be fine..Obviously the newspapers were not sterile, and she was not fine.. She felt that she had no choice, and was willing to risk her life. She did go on to get a degree, and as I mentioned they ended up m,arrying a few years later..

had they rushed into an untimely marriage, it would have been a disaster.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

13. She was very lucky. One more thing. My mom had an abortion in the

mid 1940s. My parents had my sister who had been about a year old when my mom found out she was pregnant. Times were tough and they couldn't afford another baby. She was lucky enough to find a OBGYN who performed illegal abortions. This man was a very well respected Dr. Everything came out fine. 2 years later, when they were in a better financial situation they had my brother and 6 years later me. She never regretted what she did.

[SoCalDem]

14. That probably happened a lot. People take contraception

for granted. Married people had too many children too quickly and I suspect that lots of abortions happened just like your scenario.. As a kid I remember my Mother talking about D & C's that her friends had. You rarely hear about that procedure these days.. It may be that antibiotics are preventing them, but I wonder...

[alphafemale]

10. These are the types of stories that need to be repeated loudly and often.

Most people, afterall, have no direct memory of the days of dangerous illegal abortions.

Not just those under 30, but, everyone under 40-45 or so (being they were kids when Roe passed.)

Thave no way of knowing the horrific realities.

[SoCalDem]

11. People who are young today have no idea how it used to be

and could be again. The state I lived in when this happened was referred to as the beltbuckle of the bible belt, so you can be sure that services would go in those places first.. I suppose that in large metro areas, there would be real doctors who would still be brave enough to help womken, but in small places, the fear of being killed by some nutcase would be higher than ever:(

[GreenPartyVoter]

16. My mom told me about a girl in her dorm who threw herself down the

stairs to get rid of a baby.

I have no idea if it worked or if she hurt herself. :(

[Cleita]

18. In the movies, pregnant ladies who fell down the stairs

often had miscarriages. Many women thought it would work for them. Turns out it's a lot tougher. One of my neighbors tried to induce a miscarriage by drinking gin and overworking herself on an exercise-cycle.

She finally had to do a trip to Mexico. People don't know how bad it was to get an abortion back then. Carrying the baby to full term also was a traumatic situation. Either you had to give it up for adoption, or be forever branded as a scarlet woman for having sex outside of marriage. If you were married, it was an extra mouth to feed you often couldn't afford.

Contraception was hard for women to get if they were single, but it was often unreliable even if you were married. Yet for some reason or the other the burden of the blame usually rested with the woman. :shrug:

[REACTIVATED IN CT]

21. Thanks for sharing this

Many have forgotten or are too young to have ever known what it was like "back then"

[livinginphotographs]

22. Are you sure five months was long enough.

She maybe should've waited a bit longer to see if she really wanted to keep it.

After all, women are emotional, unstable creatures, and are 99% of the time unable to make decisions regarding their own bodies. That's why they need men to do it for them, especially men who have absolutely no background in medicine.

And may I add....BIG FUCKING :sarcasm:


(sorry, just reacting to some of the nauseating comments in the other thread today)