Intelligent Design must include The God of FSM or we'll sue!!!!

[fearnobush]

With his noodly appendage, The FSM created the Mountains, Trees and a Midget. Remember, we are all His creatures.

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OPEN LETTER TO KANSAS SCHOOL BOARD

I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.


<http://www.venganza.org />

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"We have evidence that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but we have written accounts of it. We have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power. Also, you may be surprised to hear that there are over 10 million of us, and growing. We tend to be very secretive, as many people claim our beliefs are not substantiated by observable evidence."


"I’m sure you now realize how important it is that your students are taught this alternate theory. It is absolutely imperative that they realize that observable evidence is at the discretion of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to teach our beliefs without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia. I cannot stress the importance of this, and unfortunately cannot describe in detail why this must be done as I fear this letter is already becoming too long. The concise explanation is that He becomes angry if we don’t.

You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature."

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[sniffa]

1. i've shown my aLLegiance

with a new avatar.

[Hello_Kitty]

2. I hereby renounce my atheism

In order to submit my life and will to the Almighty FSM!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[ironman202]

3. This, my friend, is Satire writ large!!!

[fearnobush]

5. No.. it is not, the FSM has touched me with his Noodly Appendage.

I am truly saved.



:sarcasm:

[leftofthedial]

4. No! No! No!

Muffy the Mystery Cat is the one true intelligent designer!

Great satire!

:thumbsup:

[charlie]

6. Can't be world class without a schism

Nothing demonstrates real devotion like an ecumenical fracture. I say it's way past time we killed the Cream Sauce Heretics.

[BootinUp]

7. You're post

after I stopped giggling, I called my friend and shared it with him, we traversed the subjects of intelligent design, war on terra, and wives. Laughed so hard we couldn't breathe. Cya.