Humor: Dems unify to bash those other guys

[TayTay]

Posted on DU group in response to the startling idea that DU felt less bashy lately toward Dems and why is it that we bash each other so much anyway?

History of the Democratic Party (Condensed.)

In the beginning, Gawd created the heavens and the earth and all that other stuff and then got bored and decided to create Democrats. At first there were only two, and it was good. And they got along real well until:

"Wow, we both agree that we should run the garden in peace and harmony and take care of the animals and see to the plants and not spoil our living space and share and divide the harvest and encourage each other all we can. This is paradise. Apple?"
"Is that MacIntosh or a Granny Smith?"
"Granny Smith, why?"
"I hate Granny Smith apples. They are sour and green and gross. They suck. Anyone who likes Granny Smith apples is a tool of the fascist military industrial complex and I can't possibly co-habitate with them."
"Oh yeah, well MacIntosh apples are common and lack imagination and don't taste as good in pies. Purest bastard. I can't co-habitate with you."

And so they separated, unable to agree on what apple to eat at the moment. Sigh! And Gawd saw this and laughed and laughed. And wasn't bored anymore. (Sometimes I question Gawd's motives. Sadist.)

Later on in the Garden, after Gawd saw fit to create snakes and rats and goats and Rethugs the two Democrats passed each other.

"Oh, fascist imperialist lackey of the corporate elite. How ya been."
"Not bad, you ignorant, unrealistic follower of lost causes. How's by you?" And they smirked at each other and kept their distance.

And just then a terrible rampaging mastodon burst out of the trees at the edge of the Garden and ran toward them at full speed. They knew that if they were ever to get out of the path of this horrible animal they would have to work together. So one Democrat picked up a bow and the other supplied the arrows and together they slew the horrible beast by working in harmony. And later on they had steaks on the grill. And although they retained their intense dislike of each other's choice in apples, damn could they hunt together when they had to.

And Gawd laughed and laughed. And wasn't bored any more. (Gawd just might be a Democrat, the jury is still out. But honestly, that trait of inciting trouble just for trouble's sake does sound familiar.)

In other words: There's Rethug blood in the water and it's driving Dems to consider Unity, the action of last resort. We may not like each other, but hot damn do we really despise those other guys.

[blm]

1. Man is this a breath of fresh air. The Daily Show should give you a call.

trof has a hysterical post today, too. Take a look at it...should be on the first page here.

[blm]

2. Bumping for more eyeballs....

I appreciate original humor.

[JanusAscending]

3. NOMINATED!!

Forgot to mention how much I enjoyed this last night Tay!! Come on all you "kerryites" !!! We gotta get this bumped up to the Greatest Page!!!!!:bounce: :kick: :rofl: DC

[rox63]

4. This rocks!

Nominated!!!

[maine_raptor]

5. Nom'ed and one more and it's a golden oldie

keep up the good work.

[lynettebro440]

6. Kicked and Nominated

Thanks for the smile, you hit it on the head.

:kick:

[crispini]

7. snork

:kick:

[Infomaniac]

8. That about sums up our party.

The rampaging mastodon wasn't named Rush by any chance, was it?

[Dr Fate]

9. It is SOOOO much more fun crushing trolls & repubs than each other.

If for no other reason, do it cuz it's more FUN!!!!

[emulatorloo]

10. kick for taking down the raging mastodon

:kick: :kick: :kick:

[TayTay]

11. Thanks!

I appreciate all the comments.

And here's to hunting Rethug Mastadon with all of you. (And maybe buying peaches next time, and skipping the apples all together.)

[meganmonkey]

12. Kick

That was a good first thread to read this morning. Maybe I should leave it at that and get off DU for today with a smile on my face.

Yeah, right ;)