Oral sex can transmit virtually any sexually transmitted disease.

[Lindacooks]

I was totally appalled to see on another thread, that almost everyone who resopnded was joking about teens having oral sex. This 'trend' is becoming more popular among kids as young as 11 and 12 years old and, in fact, oral sex is already prevalent at age 14. And oral sex can transmit chlamydia, gonnorhea, herpes, AND HIV.

And if you think little girls aren't being pressured to have oral sex with boys, think again. There's MORE pressure there because of the mistaken impression that oral sex is safe and that it's not 'sex'.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/04/04/health/webmd/main685425.shtml

http://www.news-medical.net/?id=8044

Do you still think it's funny?

[hippiechick]

1. eww

:puke: Gives the term 'cotton mouth' a whole new meaning ...

[SteppingRazor]

2. From your articles:

"A lot of the media reports I've seen about teen oral sex are rather alarmist. But it has been going on for a long time. It is nothing new, as data from 1988 and 1995 show. If anything, this latest research shows an incidence lower than we've seen before. But this is not a national sample."

And from the other:

"The low frequency of infection we detected at enrollment is consistent with other research indicating a reduction in HSV-1 prevalence among younger people," said Sharon Hillier, Ph.D., professor in the departments of obstetrics, gynecology and reproductive sciences and molecular genetics and biochemistry at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine and the study's senior author. "As a result, a significant number of young adults are now susceptible to oral or genital HSV-1 infection."


So, there seem to actually be LESS cases of herpes, and LESS oral sex than their used to be. So what's the big deal here?

Also, speaking as one of the jokesters from the other thread, I realize that STD's aren't a laughing matter (except "The Clap." That's pretty funny.), but from all these studies it seems most teens are not sexually active. Of the ones that are, most get through it just fine.
How long, exactly should people not have sex? Into their 20s? 30s? Wait until they're married?
Sex is an expression of love. What's the big deal?
Of course, on the other hand, if I ever have a daughter, I'm breaking her boyfriends' legs just on general principle. :evilgrin:

[Lindacooks]

4. Sex is NOT an expression of love, especially for young kids.

You honestly think that 11 and 12 year olds know enough about love to be comfortable having sex?? There have always been those who pressure their girlfriends (and boyfriends) to have sex. And the pressure ratches up when these kids think that oral sex is 'no big deal'.

The age of consent, usually 16, has been set as law for years simply because kids younger than that just can't understand the emotional and physical consequences of sex. I'm not going to tell anybody when they can have sex, EXCEPT for kids.

We're also talking a whole new area of possibility for date rape.

[SteppingRazor]

6. Completely agree here...

But the post yesterday was on high-school students, not 11 and 12 year olds.

[SoCalDem]

13. I am so glad my kids are grown.. I sympathize with parents

of young teens.. They are bombarded with sex everywhere, and are expected to wait..and peer pressure seems to be the opposite of when I was young. In MY day, the BAD girls were the ones who "put out"..these days , stigma seems to be entirely missing,:shrug:

We always told our kids that anything that underwear covered was PRIVATE...and not to be touched by anyone or anything....any touching of "underwear areas" that was not done by a doctor (with parental supervision) was sex and or abuse..and consentual sex was for grownups..

If it's covered (or meant to be covered) by underwear, it's OFF LIMITS !

[triguy46]

16. Let's get some data here...

We are still in the paradigm of "prevalent." Date rape/rape... its all the same, an act of violence not an act of sexuality.

[Throckmorton]

17. So, that never stopped me, did it.

and I started at age 11.

You make it sound like sexually active teens is a new thing.

[Lindacooks]

28. You started at age 11, huh?

Let me guess - first of all, you're a guy.

And secondly, if your childhood was cut that short, I feel sorry for you.

And now you're on ignore.

[nvliberal]

40. I seriously doubt

many eleven- and twelve-year-olds are having sex, at least consensual.

Many, many kids, especially boys, don't hit puberty until later.

I also suspect many of those teens polled are lying, because there is nothing worse than admitting not "doing it."

[maine_raptor]

3. They need to develop male and female condoms that

are both less filling and taste great!

[Double T]

5. Not Funny. The religious right and wrong don't want sex education taught

in schools, so this is the outcome we might expect. Fundies are delusional people that are their own worst enemy; ignore the facts and realty and it will go away. I think NOT!!!!

[triguy46]

12. Surprise! its NOT being taught now...

Many teachers avoid these topics to avoid confrontation, embarassment. For the same reason, "evolution" is disappearing from the curriculum without the need for Kansas like action. Its just easier to skip it and not have your house picketed, your car keyed, and threatening phone calls.

Secondly, sex ed has succeeded in providing knowledge, but failed in changing behaviors. You can find support for this by searching the web for YBRS-C to see how college students report their sexual behaviors. They know its risky, but have myriad reasons to not use condoms...

[Skittles]

7. that thread was making fun of the fact they're BLAMING CLINTON for it

OK????????????????

[LostinVA]

19. The one I read didn't start out talking about Clinton

It was about the study, and most responders to the thread were joking about it. That's the one I read. It may have changed direction later..... maybe Linda read the same one.

[Skittles]

26. ah ok

in that case I would agree - while the subject may be ripe for ribbing it is serious sexual behaviour for what are essentially children

[CanOfWhoopAss]

8. Lindacleans too? (jk) Thanks for sharing the links (nt)

[Lindacooks]

30. What the hell does that mean?

I make my living writing cookbooks and I'm currently supporting my family doing it.

If that was an insult, I want an apology. I'll bet I'm more liberal than you are.

[CanOfWhoopAss]

38. jk = just kidding... my apologies to u 4 being a wise @$$

No rhyme or reason just being silly. Thanks again for sharing the link. Well... my daughters (no sons) aren't thanking you. It inspired me to give them another lecture on life. Bad enough I love to hear myself talk. A love my girls do not share.

[mongo]

39. Prehaps some flavored condoms with the talk

would be a good idea?

[CanOfWhoopAss]

41. flavored would be encouraging them. let em taste latex when they think..

they are ready. that with salty, smelly, sweaty balls may end any curiosity in its tracks. i keep them pretty busy in softball, basketball, tennis and i'm always sneaking up on them so they are paranoid as to when i'm around. hopefully we can stall this until their 30s.

[mongo]

42. Man, you need to get real

Of course, I didn't regain custody of my daughter until she was 14 - smoking, drinking, having sex, and smoking pot. Her mother dumped her on me from 500 miles away on 24 hours notice (one of the best damn things that has ever happened to me).

We concentrated on harm reduction for the next couple of years. It paid off well. By the time she was 16 she was a fairly responsible near-adult. She's an honor student in college now.

[CanOfWhoopAss]

43. I'm very real

The oldest is on birth control and has spermicidal latex available to her 24/7. Doesn't mean I'll make it easy or convenient for her. She is in her teen years now and still tears up when she has a pap appointment.

We talk about sex all the time and I have pics of advanced stages of of chancre sours every were constantly reminding them all. I think they get annoyed when I bring it up in a restaurant or at the breakfast table but oh well...

I remember what it was like growing up and most of my friends were sexually active in elementary school. I probably would have too but I had to go home when the street lights went out.

[ComerPerro]

9. I would bet anything that those articles are overhyped

Lets see, ask a guy if he's having or getting oral sex, I don't care what age he's at, and what do you think he will answer?

Especially if he's polled near his peers.

And, I wonder how precise and honest the people taking the surveys are? Do they have an agenda? Are they wanting to see high numbers of 11 year olds reporting being sexually active? What are they promoting?

[triguy46]

11. Who defines "prevalent"?

A few facts and references would be nice.

[triguy46]

14. Active social norming in process

Many students will answer with how their perceive their peers to behave. This is supported by many studies on college drinking. students over report the drinking of their peers.

haven't we learned from the revelations associated with Margaret Mead's work that people will lie about their sexual behavior? The only thing they will lie more about is how much they earn and how many MPG their hummer gets.

[triguy46]

10. check your sense of humor at the door...

Ok, its acceptable for us to call the president a chimp, make fun of him for taking a pee break, for not being able to button his shirt, etc, etc, but we can't make light with a "serious" issue? I guess we went one step too far...

[Lindacooks]

31. Yes, it was one step too far. Sex among preteens is a serious issue

with serious consequences, and the vast majority of posts I saw were joking about 'gee, that wasn't happening when I was a teenager', etc.

[LostinVA]

15. Me too -- I was one who wasn't joking about it

I have two nurses in my family, and they've told some hair-raising stories about both horrible oral STD incidents, and kids (especially girls) who give blow jobs at the end of a date as casually as we gave kisses. Because they were expected to -- it's the cool thing.... And, I'm not being prudish... I'm talking about self-respect.

[Lindacooks]

33. Yes, exactly, thank you.

You KNOW that the vast majority of oral sex is girls giving it to boys, not the other way around. And these girls are losing their self respect and minimizing themselves, especially when they are told that it's no big deal.

[MsTryska]

18. yeah i learned that

when a coworker who "wasn't gay - he just liked getting f*cked by men" gave me a graphic description of the syphilis the doctor found....in his throat.



but this is what saran wrap, dental dams and condoms are for.

[LostinVA]

20. Yeah, but ignorant kids don't know that

Especially when both the school and the home don't talk about sex, 'cause that'll make the kids do it... right.

[MsTryska]

21. this is true......

i'm shocked and appalled by the lack of knowledge on protection kids have these days.


growing up in the shadow of the AIDS epidemic we learned all of this through school.

[triguy46]

22. Smart kids don't know it either...

Sex ed has not changed behaviors. It has increased knowledge but not broken down the shield of teen invincibility, (I love him/her, I can't get it, or "but he/she is from such a good home." We have yet been able to find the magic words to stop teen passion or adult passion for that matter.

[MsTryska]

37. This is the part i don't get?

what is so freakin difficult about condom use?



i've pretty much used condoms for any applicable sex, since i started having a sex life.


it's a prerequisite for me. And I'm a woman. And if a guy doesn't like it, he either isn't getting any, or will learn to like it.



I can't for the life of me understand why women let guys have sex iwht them without condoms.


the best i can come up with is low self-esteem - like they're willign to do whatever the guy says, because OMG he might not like me, if i don't do it his way.

[donsu]

23. this is a tragedy happening to teenage girls - it is a very big problem

and there should be a nation wide campaign to educate them. smirk's gang won't do this, we women have to do it on our own.

STDs are rampant. it's as if americans have gotten dumber over the years and not smarter about STDs.

it's a known fact that lead and mercury impairs the brain.........

[triguy46]

24. I sound like a repug, but that seems to be the key point

I'm assuming when you say "we women have to do it on our own" you are referring to family/support network. That is and always will be the most effective means of educating our children on behaviors. If we defer to "sex ed" it just ain't gonna work. But this problem is much greater than the issue of 11-12 year olds. I can tell you that from experience of our university clinic that daily we see the resulting tragedy of unsafe sex played out. Either through unwanted pregnancy, STDs, or just emotional trauma.

[donsu]

25. I meant more then family - I mean some kind of program

some kind of planned outreach.

[Chovexani]

29. And if the kid comes from a repressive fundie household?

Trust me, I know of what I speak. I was damn lucky I had health teachers in school who were ready, willing and able to impart scientific facts about sex and how to protect myself because I sure as hell wasn't getting it at home.

If a kid doesn't get it at home or at school he/she is going to get it from the School of Hard Knocks, Street Campus. And that's the absolute last place to be getting that kind of info.

[King Coal]

27. It's Clinton's fault, Linda.

Clinton invented sex. Should I grow up?

[Lindacooks]

32. Yes, I think you should.

Why do you have such a hard time understanding that preteens thinking oral sex is not sex is a bad thing? Or that STDs among 11 and 12 year olds is a bad thing? Now you're on ignore.

[King Coal]

35. Am I on ignore for all the Woolworth stores, or just the one?

[shimmergal]

34. Arghh!

What annoys me most about so many of the posts here are people telling me - us - how to think!

The RW commentators & others raved about how wrong the American people were during Monicagate, too, for "thinking oral sex is not real sex."

And as far as immature sex taking an emotional toll. Yes, it can. I hate to think how many 30- and 40-years olds are still immature and hence at risk if they have sex.
More to the point, LOVE can take an emotional toll on anybody. Seldom do both people come out of a love relationship with both feeling the same way about it. One, at least, is going to be hurt (whether they admit it or not.) This is true whether they've ever had sex or not. Some of the biggest disillusionments come when friendships fall apart.

[leftofthedial]

36. dude, that sucks

I mean that blows.