Cheney to Spend a Month Above Ground

[Eastside Blue]

And now for a little humor ...

Sept. 20, 2005 - Vice President Dick Cheney said today that in an effort to pump up the White House's anemic approval ratings he would remain above ground for an entire month and would not return to his secure, undisclosed location until November.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9409148/site/newsweek/

[Downtown Hound]

1. Ha! For a minute there I thought it was real

because it's so close to being accurate.

[rzemanfl]

2. I can't wait until he is below ground permanently and I can go

there to urinate...

[leeroysphitz]

4. nice,,, nt

[kliljedahl]

5. I'd have to drop my pants to do what I want to do

[rzemanfl]

6. Half the country would have to drop their pants just to do what

I want to do. Having a penis is such a labor saver.

[kliljedahl]

10. I'm a guy, I only drop my pants for one thing

& it isn't peeing.

[rzemanfl]

21. One? Sorry about your sex life. n/t

[mark11727]

3. Great. If he sees his shadow, we get six more weeks of autumn.

[comsymp]

7. No, if he sees his shadow, Halliburton gets six more no-bid contracts

[mark11727]

18. LOL! Touche, you rascal..!

[maine_raptor]

8. Wait a minute I thought Vampires can't stand sunlight?

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

9. Until November? He won't go back under until Halloween is over, of course

Cheney and Novak love their annual lighthearted games of inviting little trick-or-treaters down to their basement for dinner.

[jazzjunkysue]

11. Moving the coffin up to the guestroom, I'd venture. Transylvanian soil is

heavier than most, so, it will take some special equipment to hoist it up and through the window, but, a small crane should be able to do it. Messy, though.

[liveoaktx]

12. Why does that make me think of Motel Hell?

[tabasco]

13. If he sleeps on soil from Transylvania ..

he can go two, maybe three weeks. Then back to the crypt.

[Phoebe Loosinhouse]

14. If I were one of you incredibly talented graphic people and I wanted

to depict Dick Cheyney - I would remember those weird drawings in encyclopedias of fish that live where there is no light - they are always translucently white and have nubs where their eyes would be and eyethingys on stalk-feelers to make their way in the netherworld. Remind you of anyone?!!

[dxstone]

25. Reminds me of the Hideous OctoCheney!!!

This pic's been on my site for months, and was published in a small alt newspaper several years ago... interesting that we come to the same odd conclusions about this guy, isn't it?
d

[sakabatou]

15. I'm gonna hang garlic around my room

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

16. Dick Cheney without his special outside-the-lair make-up

[Mr_Jefferson_24]

19. Looks considerably better. nt.

[Raster]

17. Secure Undisclosed Location = Coffin

[BiggJawn]

20. So, TinMan, the new ticker working out better than Chandra's?

Not anticipating any more secret surgery this year?

[Ikonoklast]

22. Did he have all the ichor in his veins

replaced with blood freshly transfused from virgins? Or is he afraid that having to sleep in the earth of his native land makes him a sitting target for someone with a wooden stake?


Cheney makes Nosferatu look like a sissy.

[jazzjunkysue]

26. Just an Animatronic Re-fit. The nano-knees are only good for 5-8 years.

It's all about the updates.

[spuddonna]

23. Don't forget your crosses and wooden stakes everyone!

It must be time for Cheney to FEED!!! :scared:

[Blue Belle]

24. Won't the underworld miss him??

Who will monitor the evil souls boiling in the pits? Who will ferry the boat up the river styx?? Who will do this important work in his stead??