Coma patient awakens after four years, asks "what'd I miss?" You say...

[Skip Intro]

Of course, this is just a hypothetical question - I'm not coming out of a coma or anything (may be subconsciously trying to induce one). Just curious, I guess, how duers (and lurkering freeps, if you feel up to it) would bring someone up to date on "things" that matter, that have transpired since, I dunno, 1999. Just the big things.

[FlashHarry]

1. Go back to sleep. We'll wake you in Nov. '04.

[dwckabal]

7. You stole mine! N/T

[burrowowl]

2. A coup d'etat

occurred in the U$A, go back to sleep unless you can join the resistance.

[the_real_38]

3. Um, "we won the election"....

... then hit him with the bad news later. He's been through a lot, you know.

[knight_of_the_star]

4. You missed a lot friend

Would you like me to tell you the bad news now or just let you go back to sleep and wait until 2005?

[SammyWinstonJack]

5. Four years of twilight zone bizarro world wacked out

through the looking glass nonsense. And it ain't over yet.

[BlueJazz]

6. "Well, my Friend.....,

...I've got some Bad news about George Bush....
But some Good news about Rush Limbaugh...

[Lone_Wolf_Moderate]

8. Well let's see...

9-11, the mess in Florida, War in Iraq, those are the big ones...

[JasonBerry]

9. Went To Your Web Site

Your web site address is in your profile, so I made a visit.....

"I am still 100 percent proud of our troops for liberating the people of Iraq, and have always supported them."

I'm curious, do you STILL support the war on Iraq? As a Christian? How can a bonafide Christian truly support bombing and killing to show people that bombing and killing is wrong?

"Alan Colmes' official website. In case you don't know who he is, he's the liberal on Hannity and Colmes. One of the leading progressive voices out there."

I hope you are kidding about the part bolded above. Alan Colmes has no respect at all in the progressive movement.

[qwertyMike]

10. American Idol :)

[slor]

11. "Hello Buddy..."

"Glad to have you back, by the way, did you ever have a Wilma Cline as a maid?"

[Design8edGrouch]

12. You need to be sitting down before I tell you this

You might recall America being the land of the free and the home of the brave. You might also remember something about truth, justice and the American way. Well none of that counts anymore. It is now the land of Enron and the home of the Groper. Truth has been gone so long that none of us can distinguish it from lies. Justice was replaced by something called the Patriot Act. And the American way was imprisoned along with hundreds of Muslims, who will never be given the opportunity to defend themselves in a court of law.

[xultar]

13. What did you miss....

Well let me see, Arnie is Gov of CA....
OH NO! Someone Get the Dr. STAT! I think they went back into the coma...or died!

[greatauntoftriplets]

14. You don't want to know!

What else???

[mandyky]

15. Where to begin.. So do you remember Bill Clinton and

Al Gore? Well, Al dissed Bill and there was a close election - the Supreme Court installed GWBush, and it has been hell to pay in Washington. On Sept 11, 2001 we had a major terrorist attack, and this current regime has exploited the fear of the loss of 3000+ lives to start wars and undermine our civil liberties. There is so much more, any questions so far?

[HalfManHalfBiscuit]

16. The Olsen Twins are now Legal

nt

[Ellen Forradalom]

17. Are you rewriting the storyline to Kill Bill?

just asking

[Terwilliger]

18. Tell him the world didn't end like people thought it would

he should be happy about it

[Yupster]

19. The Expos

play some of their home games in Puerto Rico, and the stock market crashed, but they are probably not related to each other.