Objective: Christian Ministries Seek to Censor & Control Internet

[Melinda]

Our Purpose:
The Internet was created by the United States of America - a Christian nation - and should not be used to spread anti-Christian, secular, or non-Christian propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.


For this reason, this website was created to try and stop one of the more vile and dangerous misuses of the Internet: using it to mock Our Lord Jesus Christ, His teachings, and His followers. And one site in particular stands out in need of stoppage: Landover Baptist.

http://objective.jesussave.us/shutdown.html



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Follow along - they start with one site now - who and what is next?

Look past the one stated objective and read the many other links on the site - this is fundamental extremism at its scariest, although I must admit I got a good giggle reading passages such as this:

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While many Christians correctly see Halloween as a time of occult dangers - when Satan is out in force trying to corrupt our society - they overlook the fact that all things are created by the Lord for a purpose. So what is the purpose of this dark time of the year?


Consider this: At what other time of the year do throngs of unsaved children come to your door, begging for you to give them a treat? Why not use this unique opportunity to give these deprived children the best treat of all - the treat of Christ's Love and eternal Salvation?

Jesus Himself preached to the whores and money changers, the very people most in need of his Love. These unsaved trick-or-treaters - innocent children tricked by secular society and their non-Christian parents into participating in occult rituals - are exactly the ones in need of the Good News of Christ. And there they are, right on your door step!

Clearly the Lord has created Halloween for the purpose of bringing the would-be-damned to us, His loyal followers, at an early age so that we may help them on the way to Salvation. So, in fact, this is not merely an unexpected opportunity, it is an obligation that we as Christians must rise to. Halloween isn't the witching season, it's the witnessing season!

http://objective.jesussave.us/halloween.html


Starting this year, witches are
out and Jesus is in!
Reclaim Halloween in
the name of Jesus!

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Laughter aside, this stuff is big time frightening, as frightening as Fred Phelps and his ilk. For those with small children, please make sure to accompany them as they go (if they go) door to door this halloween - it is apparant that monsters of all stripes and persuasions live behind seemingly normal doors.

A holy war by any other name...........

[FlashHarry]

1. Er, you do know this is a parody, right?

Similar to the hilarious Betty Bowers site.

[Melinda]

3. No, Landover is the parody - these guys are DEAD serious

eom

[FlashHarry]

4. Oh my GOD!

It was so sick, I figured it was a self-referential Landover parody!

On edit: I was right. It is a parody. A deep, twisted parody. Huzzah!

[Melinda]

5. Check out their "FAQ":

http://objective.jesussave.us/faq.htm

[FlashHarry]

6. WTF? It redirects to: http://www.hyperebooknet.com/

[Rooktoven]

8. Actually, this is _part_ of the Landover joke

more layers of the onion so to speak. The guy(s) here condemning Landover is (are) Landover. This has been covered in mainstream media before. Sorry, no reference links. Dig a little on the site and you'll see.

[Melinda]

16. Sorry, but I've been all over the site and I think you are incorrect.

:shrug:

[Brian Sweat]

24. The site is a parody run by the same people who run Landover.

This is there way of taking the parody to the next level.

[hang a left]

2. OMFG These people are nutballs! Seriously, they need white

jackets and psych meds. I can't believe they are allowed to run the street free. Lock up your children!!!!!!!!!

[FlashHarry]

7. BAZOOKA JESUS???

This has to be a parody! Nobody could be this insane!

[Mari333]

9. This IS a parody...look at the BIOS. of the members.its hilarious

Its Chris Harper and "Sister Taffy" (I know who "she" really is, and have talked to "her")
Hilarious. damn they are good.
http://objective.jesussave.us/members.html

[FlashHarry]

11. This is brilliant. I love the kids' page

http://objective.jesussave.us/kidz.html

[Melinda]

13. Who? I don't see either of those folks at your link...

I just don't see how this site is a parody -- peruse ALL of the site and click on its links.... it's so bizarre it seems as if it must be parody...

[Tempest]

10. H.O.L.B.

Hands Off Landover Baptists

http://www.geocities.com/hands_off_lb/index_old.html

The graphic alone is worth the visit.

[FlashHarry]

12. More: Apple (computer) promotes 'Godless Darwinism and Communism'

From a UK site: http://www.theregister.co.uk/content/28/24968.html

[eleny]

14. Shouldn't they be packing their bags for an Iraq ministry?

I mean - isn't that next?

[FlashHarry]

15. Proof it's a parody:

Here's their merchandise page: http://www.cafeshops.com/objectivemin/

Here's Landover Baptist's merchandise page: http://www.cafeshops.com/landoverbaptist

Same company (who also make merch. for Bartcop and a bunch of other 'librul' outfits.)

[Melinda]

19. cafeshops provides merchandise across the spectrum...

Sorry, but this isn't proof it's satire, Harry. Some of cafeshops other merchants:

http://www.cafeshops.com/dupagelib (libertarians)

http://www.cafeshops.com/makewarnotlove2 (I back Bush)

http://www.cafeshops.com/fpa (The Walmart of Patriotism)

And another 302 stores in the Religious category:

http://www.cafeshops.com/cp/dir_browse.aspx?dir=126

[FlashHarry]

20. Don't you think it's odd that two 'opposing' sites use the same vendor?

[Melinda]

23. cafeshops is in business to make $$$ - think they are gonna discriminate?

I don't.

[FlashHarry]

25. I'm gonna buy me a 'Hopsiah, the Kanga-jew' t-shirt!

http://www.cafeshops.com/objectivemin.7741748

If this ain't a parody...

[Melinda]

27. Do I think it odd they share a vendor? No, and here is why:.

Think cable providers.

Can you explain why that parody sites page would link to this?



That link will take you to http://www.faithandaction.org/

How does that figure in?

[FlashHarry]

28. Actually, it takes me to: http://www.hyperebooknet.com/

Again, it's redirecting for some reason. Weird.

[Melinda]

29. Argh... I'd truly prefer to believe this to BE a hoax...

Can you clear your cache or something? Anyway, I googled and came up with another take on this site - nice to know I'm not the only confuzzled out here. I'm just not convinced the site in question is satire. :shrug:

[FlashHarry]

31. I'm with you. I hope to hell it is a hoax.

Upon further review (especially the GOD flag), I'm pretty convinced it is indeed a brilliantly conceived hoax.

Apparently, this has been the subject of much debate across the 'net! Either way, it's funny as hell.

[Blue_Chill]

17. Die already?

haha fucking ha.

Great fucking parody site, just sooo fucking funny. Good luck in your quest to help Landover baptist......

[FlashHarry]

18. Huh?

[Blue_Chill]

22. Click on the site these evil christians are trying to ban

...

[FlashHarry]

26. I still don't understand...

...which site? You do realize this is a parody site, yes?

[MrPrax]

21. This could be a funny trend

kinda of subversive...a whole bunch of parody sites attacking the 'righteousness' or lack thereof other parody sites!!

Makes targeting by the 'REAL' fundies difficult and spawning new parody sites would see a natural outcome from the common practice of 'copycats' and 'soundalikes'...
Since you have to purchase domains to keep others from hijacking you, you are also required to USE those sites for fear of losing them under accusations of 'squatting'...
So you set up one parody...and then set up your own 'foil'

[Jack The Tab]

30. ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT! These guys are geniuses!!

More Bible-Thumpers will visit this site and in turn the Landover Baptist site, and the most of them will never recognize it as parody - their support or words of support become the greatest parody of all.

The people responsible for this site are simply geniuses!

[hunter]

32. Oh for goodness sakes...

We have neighbors who attempt to counter all the Godless ones roaming around every Halloween by throwing a big party in their garage. They give the kids gigantic candy bars and read them scary Bible stories, etc., etc. They tell the kids that Harry Potter and Pokemon are against God, and that the Earth was created just as the Bible says in Genesis, thousands, not billions of years ago.

The kids come home with tons of pamphlets in their goody bags, some that have very interesting internet links, such as those that explain how Halloween and "Day of the Dead" celebrations are evidence of Catholic degeneracy.

The local goths, and proto-goths actively seek this place out as their first stop of the night. The folks hand out large swaths of inexpensive fabric to cover up girls dressed in costumes they deem inappropriate. (I don't know what these kids do with their prizes, and I probably don't want to know.)

It has evolved into a bizarre neighborhood ritual. It is a parody of itself.

Landover Baptist is clever and amusing, but who needs it served up on a pretty plate when you can dredge up great raw heaping gobs of it by typing something like Christian internet pornography into google.

Happy surfing, trick or treat.