You got the phone call..."they" are on the way to your house..

[SoCalDem]

Who are "they"???
How long will it take you to "get ready"?
Will you be embarrassed about the condition of your place?
What's for dinner?
What's for entertainment?

[GOPisEvil]

1. Hmmm...

Who are "they"??? Most likely a friend of mine.
How long will it take you to "get ready"? 10 minutes if I've showered, 30 if not
Will you be embarrassed about the condition of your place?Now? Yes! I'm cleaning this weekend though. The bathroom is done!
What's for dinner?We're eating out.
What's for entertainment? Whichever of our favorite bands is playing.

[tjdee]

2. I have to clean the bathroom!

I don't know why this happens, LOL.
My place is always messiest when people are coming over!
My bathroom in particular always has clothes on the floor, soaps/lotions/jewelry all around the sink.....ugh. I have a friend coming over tomorrow, and I so don't feel like dealing with the aggravation LOL.

I don't know why I'm messy, and I feel worse now that I have a kid. I try, I do!

[celestia671]

3. I hate cleaning!

I do enough of that at work!

[sandnsea]

4. Oh my gosh, I am so sorry

I already had plans to go away for the rest of the week.

Nobody gets in my house without notice. They all know better.

[SoCalDem]

5. Ooooh,... You're Goooooood!

I usually run around like a crazy person, stashing stuff all over the place and locking doors..:)

[SiobhanClancy]

7. Me,too

One time,my mother-in-law(ex)dropped by unexpectedly and I had been wrapping gifts on the kitchen table and it was a mess. I ran into the kitchen,stuffed everything into the oven,and(you probably have an idea where this is going)the next day I turned the oven on to preheat,forgetting the stuff that was in there. It was a mess...burned and melted wrapping paper,bows,etc....last time I ever used the oven for storage:)

[SoCalDem]

8. I once melted a GIANT tupperware bowl..

I kept wonderinig what that odd smell was.. then the smoke started..

the bowl had flour in it and between the FIRE from the flour and the stringy cheesy bowl hanging from the racks, I was ready to just scream..

It was on the day we were cleaning the house we were renting, before we moved into the thouse we bought.. The power was on, be we had no lamps and we were still painting too.. I decided to clean the oven (self cleaning, so it had that damned LOCK..)

That day was another Lucy Ricardo day too, because I also stepped into a can of WHITE paint, that ran UNDER the drop cloth and onto the BROWN carpet...

My poor husband had to run out and rent a steam cleaner (we had already turned the one we had rented the day before , in) so we could RE CLEAN the carpets..


What a day that was :(

[sandnsea]

9. Oh you win the Why Me award

An oven fire AND paint on the carpet AFTER you'd just cleaned it, all in one day!!! I can't recall anything to top that!

Actually my friends are divided into two groups, the ones I talk to on the porch (not really friends) and the ones who know my house is always a mess (my friends). And I also have learned one thing, when my house is dirty, somebody WILL stop by and when it is clean, I am guaranteed an evening of solitude!

[SoCalDem]

10. When my friend Connie comes by, I just tell her

move some stuff and sit down.. want coffee?? you know where the cups are ..and while you're up...make some coffee :)

[latebloomer]

17. I've done that!

Had shrimp in a plastic container, peeled and cleaned them, then put them into the oven to get them away from the yowling cat. An hour or so later, began preheating the oven to make frozen pizza-- till I was alerted by the smell of burning plastic.

[Mandate My Ass]

21. My oven disaster story

First day when we moved into the house I'm now living in, I decided to make a huge tray of baked ziti because I knew we'd be unpacking all weekend and wanted something easy to heat up at a moment's notice. I put it all together and stuck it in the oven. About twenty minutes later we heard a huge explosion-like noise coming from the oven. The pyrex dish exploded and ziti, sauce and cheese was stuck on every inch of the interior of the oven and burning like crazy.

Turns out the thermostat regulator was broken and the temperature just heated up higher and higher until it got hot enough to explode tempered glass bakeware. I cleaned that disgusting mess up for nothing because the oven was 30 years old and the part to fix it didn't exist anymore.

I used to care what my house looked like when people come over unexpectedly, now I don't. It's usually got that lived in look.

[Sal316]

6. I have to do some tonight!

'They' is a 'she' flying in tomorrow at noon!

YIKES!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

11. OK

THEY is usually my relatives or friends.
I don't get ready. If THEY want to see me THEY can see me as I am (including in pajamas if that's what I feel like wearing all day)
I won't be embarrassed...don't like my house...go home.
THEY come for whatever is for dinner because I am the EPIC cook..it can be my special all day ribs or my green and pink peppercorn crusted rib roast...my souffle's or my chicken in black cherry chili sauce THEY LIVE FOR IT :D (that's why THEY tolerate my lack of formality)

I'm usually the entertainment at my house.

[moosedog]

12. Your home is your castle..

Everyone should keep their home the way they like it. Don't live for what other people might think of you. I feel better if my home is in order, because otherwise my brain doesn't work. The only clutter I can have without feeling confused, is the dolls sitting or standing around everywhere. Otherwise, my home is neat. Does that make sense? Mrs. Moose

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

15. It absolutely does

BTW nice to see the Moose's posting again. :D

[moosedog]

18. Thank you nothingshocksme anymore...

I want, so much, to hand down what I have learned in my 70 years. Our kids just laugh at our wisdom. LOL I keep telling our sons that it is my job to teach them even if they are grown men now. I'm now starting on the dils. They are so nice to put up with me. Mr. in nicer than me and doesn't push as hard. Mrs. Moose

[davsand]

13. Nobody calls us...

Probably because they know we are online all the time!

Who are "they"???
They are the misc family and neighbors and friends.

How long will it take you to "get ready"?
About a month and a half--minimum. I've decided to just bulldoze the house and start over again.

Will you be embarrassed about the condition of your place?
Nah, the yard got mowed about three weeks ago. They won't be allowed in the house, so it doesn't matter.

What's for dinner?
Reservations.

What's for entertainment?
I was thinking about showing the video of that operation they showed on Discovery last year--the one of the Gallbladder removal!

Sorry, I am just an awful smartass, aren't I? I just hate it when people drop in like that. I admit freely that my housekeeping rates somewhere between awful and gruesome, and anybody that "drops in" probably will find a mess somewhere.

Right after our daughter was born, some of my husband's distant family showed up one day on the way home to Ohio. Hubby was at work. I'd been napping with the baby up to about two minutes before they showed up and the house was just about as bad as it gets... I was wearing an old Tshirt and a pair of shorts and I was covered with misc. baby stains and leakage from the letdown reflex that hearing the baby had triggered just seconds before they rang the doorbell.

Oh, and did I mention that I'd not had a shower yet that day and it was 3 in the afternoon?

I had no idea what to do, so I just told them to clear off a space on the sofa, I'd be back after I fed the baby... Any NORMAL person would have seen that maybe this wasn't the best time to visit, but Nooo, not them! They stayed, and then announced that they'd be with us for dinnner!!!

As I headed off to the bedroom with the baby, I told them no problem, the phone book was somewhere on the coffee table, and that the paper plates were on top of the fridge out in the kitchen. I did offer to kick in ten bucks on the pizza...

Laura

[ScreamingMeemie]

14. OH MY GOD!!! Not this weekend. The house looks like a hurricane hit it...

either that or the power was out for a day and a half ;-) Dishes in the sink, doggy hair on the carpet. Half dressed children lolling about, I think I just won't answer the door, whoever they are.

[leftofthedial]

16. John Ashcroft's henchmen

no time at all, I'm already ready--just call my lawyer with the secret word

only after they leave

civil rights

pain

[alfredo]

19. Hide the bong!!!

[amazona]

20. since i had a huge oak tree fall on my house...

...I am not in the least embarrassed, and it is incumbent upon "them" to take me to dinner and entertain me and what not.

But I am not sure what you are asking. There is quite a difference between someone phoning you to warn you that the FBI is on their way to your house and your in-laws phoning to say that they are at the corner and will drop by in five minutes...

...come to think of it, maybe not that much difference.