The JOINT Press Conference of all CAPTIONS!!!

[skip fox]

"And this guy here, I mean, can you believe that cheezy French accent . . . Hell, Bill Schmidt could do better than that in high-school . . . You'd think comin' from France and all . . . I mean, that's the birthplace of the French accent, ain't it? Or should I say 'ez it no?'. . . Geez, does it help you pick up babes or what, Chester, that's what I wanta know. . ."

[AlGore-08.com]

1. Smirk: As I was sayin' to Pepe le Pew here back in the john - -

- - At least your trains ran on time when the Krauts were in charge.

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

2. See..what people have gotta unnerstan is these people

are trying to claim they invented the Freedom Fry... they think they can put the potaters in their fancy paper cups with sea salt and serve em with mayonnaise, but that ain't Freedom Fries.....Freedom Fries is served with ketchup or cheese whiz or gravy....you don't put no mayonnaise or vinegar on em... that ain't normal or Christian or American...so it ain't right...I got ta take the Freedom Fries to the world and people got ta unnerstand that they got to take em the way I say they gotta....

[skip fox]

3. "So my Dad used to tell me, to help make a decision, 'Numbnuts,

put your wishes in your left hand then take a dump in your right, and then see which one weighs more . . . And you know what? . . . It works the same way each time . . . only people only wanta shake my left hand any more . . ."

[rustydog]

4. Bush: I extend my hand in peace to our frog friends...

why aintcher shakin'my hand?
Uh, Dick, what does "fuckee vous deek-head mean in english?"

[sniffa]

5. you say potato, i say potatoe

[BigMcLargehuge]

6. Fellow Texans... I now present the King of France...

Inspector Clousseau.... Now where's that little Chinese friend of yours, probably hiding in the fridge waiting to spring out with one uh them crazy wooden swords... right... am I right...

[cosmicdot]

7. W: OK, OK, I'll spit my gum out ...

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

8. And I most graciously offer my left hand to my favorite

cheese-eating surrender monkey boy here, Jack Chirack... ain't that they way you commie leftists shake hands?

[Endangered Specie]

9. I count one amphibian and one un-evolved primate.