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As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain But that's just perfect for an Amish like me You know I shun fancy things like electricity At 4:30 in the mornin' I'm milkin' cows Jebadiah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long That even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine Then tonight were gonna party like it's 1699
We been spendin' most our lives Livin' in an Amish paradise I churned butter once or twice Livin' in an Amish paradise It's hard work and sacrifice Livin' in an Amish paradise We sell quilts at discount price Living' in an Amish paradise
A local boy kicked me in the butt last week I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek I really don't care, in fact I wish him well Cause I'll be laughin' my head off when he's burnin' in Hell But I never punched a tourist even if he deserved it An Amish with a 'tude? You know thats unheard of I never wear buttons, but I got a cool hat And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool If you come to visit you'll be bored to tears We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years But we ain't really quaint so please don't point and stare We're just technologically impaired
Theres no phones, no lights, no motor cars Not a single luxury Like Robinson Coruso, it's as primitive as can be
We been spendin' most our lives Livin' in an Amish paradise Were just plain and simple guys Livin' in an Amish paradise There's no time for sin and vice Livin' in an Amish paradise We don't fight we all play nice Livin' in an Amish paradise
Hichin' up the buggy, churnin' lots of butter Raise a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise an udder Think your really righteous, think your pure at heart? Well I know, I'm a million times as humble as thou art I'm the pious guy, the little omlettes wanna be like On my knees day and night, scorin' points for the after life So don't be vain, and don't be whiney Or else my brother, I might have to get medieval on your heinie
We been spendin' most our lives Livin' in an Amish paradise We're all crazy Menonites Livin' in an Amish paradise There's no cops or traffic lights Livin' in an Amish paradise But you'd probably think it bites Livin' in an Amish paradise
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