Welcome to the Repuke Nat'l Convention! Agenda Inside

[Bake]

Enjoy ...

REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE CONVENTION SCHEDULE
New York, NY

Be there and/or be square!

6:00 PM Opening prayer led by the Reverend Jerry Falwell

6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance

6:35 PM Burning of the Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd Amendment)

6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing

6:46 PM Seminar #1: Getting Your Kid a Military Deferment

7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong

7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries

7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury, It's What's for Dinner

8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next

8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh

8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos Are After Your Children

8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)

8:50 PM Seminar #2: Corporations: The Government of the Future

9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man"

9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong

9:10 PM EPA Address #2: Trees: The Real Cause of Forest Fires

9:30 PM Break for secret meetings

10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas

10:15 PM Lecture by Karl Rove: Doublespeak Made Easy

10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration of how to squint and talk macho

10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark "deer in headlights" stare

10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt

10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans

10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong

10:50 PM Seminar #3: Education: A Drain on Our Nation's Economy

11:10 PM Hillary Clinton Bash

11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: Evolutionists: The Dangerous New Cult

11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again

11:35 PM Blame Clinton (Five-Minute Hate)

11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies

11:50 PM Closing prayer led by Jesus Himself

12:00 PM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord


Bake

[Darth_Kitten]

1. Impressive!!!

:evilgrin:

this isn't,like, real, is it? :freak: ;) :silly:

[cestmoi]

2. When do find time for the brown-nosing?

Just wondering.