Someone tell me not to give up

[VelmaD]

I just got back from about 4 hours of shopping for clothes. I have several big events in the next few days and all my nice summer weight clothes from last year are all 4 sizes too big. So I went shopping.

I couldn't find an appropriate shirt to save my soul. Everything (and I mean everything) is made out of t-shirt material. I don't want a fucking t-shirt. I want something a little bit grownup thank you very much, but still funky.

Someone posted about this the other day and I have to agree...when dod we all start dressing all the time like we were headed to the ballgame? Even the place where I usually shop for my work clothes didn't have anything even remotely appropriate.

The disheartening part is that when I was a size 22 I can remember being so jealous of the nice clothes they had in the smaller sizes (and never in mine). Now that I am a smaller size everything is ugly, or inappropriately casual, or looks like something my best friend's mother-in-law would wear. *sigh*

Just wanted to vent.

[greatauntoftriplets]

1. Do you have a J. Jill store near you?

They have great clothes. I shop there for myself and my early 30s nieces. We all love their stuff.

www.jjill.com

[VelmaD]

3. Just looked it up and there is...

I may have to go there in the morning. How expensive are we talking about?

[greatauntoftriplets]

4. Not cheap. But quality.

Check out the sale racks.

I got a dress there for the triplets' christening 3 years ago. Originally about $200 -- got it for $30. A winter dress, wool/silk combo. Or order from the website, they also have sale stuff and ship pretty quickly.

[Pithlet]

54. I love J.Jill.

They are expensive, but have good sales.

[DS1]

2. Don't give up!

I don't shop for chick clothes (at least not without being in drag) so I don't have much advice to offer, but keep looking :)

[Robb]

5. Don't give up!

...Just imagine yourself from last year jumping in a time machine to smack you for complaining of such a problem! :D

I second J.Jill, I know a lot of women who get what you're talking about there.

[VelmaD]

9. I know...I should be happy...

to have this particular problem. :)

I'm gonna try J.Jill in the morning I think.

[DS1]

6. Btw, I was looking for a spiffy pair of shoes online earlier

I don't have the money to buy any of the ones here, but I just looked and the site has a women's clothing section as well as mens. It's pricey, damn pricey, but it was in one of the tabs in my browser and I thought I'd send it along. If nothing else, it might give you ideas.

http://www.kennethcole.com/scripts/shop/gateway.asp?gwid=29

[SarahB]

7. What about a summerweight/sundress type of thing?

I don't know if you're a "dress girl" (I know some women hate them), but I love dresses. Sometimes if you're a bit.... ahem..."built", it can be hard to get them to fit right, but it's not hopeless either. I tend to go for either really flowery, femme things or sort of a sexy bohemian type of look, but I love dresses in the Summer- for both comfort and a little extra panache as well.

[VelmaD]

10. I'm not really a dress person usually...

I did get a really gorgeous pencil skirt tonight but I have NO idea what to wear with it. The shirt thing has become a huge issue for me.

[SarahB]

11. Even knit shirts which are technically "t-shirts"

...can have a different look about them to be comfortable, but not t-shirts. I bought this shirt a few weeks back that was black, knit, cap sleeves, with a slit down so there's a bit of cleavage with a few sparkles (but sort of India-ish looking though). Probably it fits within the t-shirt category, but that certain extra little kick to make it look grown-up.

Maybe an embroidered tank top even? Lots of cute things out there. Oh how I love clothes shopping now!

[VelmaD]

12. I had ben enjoying shopping recently, but...

tonight was just bad. And I knew it was going to be bad from the little bit I had been looking recently. The stuff for this summer is just all really hideous here.

[SarahB]

14. The big rule in life....

"if you seek, you will not find"

Seems to be the case in so many things, even clothes. :)

[VelmaD]

16. Too true...

and it sucks when you just have to have that perfect outfit...right NOW. :)

[angee_is_mad]

23. An outer shirt?

maybe a fitted outer shirt that is just above the hip if you have a good waist line. Or maybe a fitted t-shirt that is out of a jersey or a knit silk material.

[Piltdown13]

8. Keep trying!

Clothes shopping can really be a trial. I've always been somewhere between size 6 to 10, but these days even that is no guarantee of being able to find something nice if you're shaped at all like a woman instead of a young teen girl -- sure, I can usually find something that fits, but most of those clothes are about 20 years too "old" for me!

Sometimes it's possible to find something nice at Talbot's. They usually have decent "nice" clothes, but their everyday offerings are a little staid for my tastes -- I got a $500 gift certificate there almost a year ago, and I still have about $150 left, which is saying something given their prices (sales are pretty reasonable, though).

[BigMcLargehuge]

13. maybe this will cheer you up

we have trouble shopping too

[VelmaD]

18. Hee...

I said it before and I'll say it again...marry me. :)

[BigMcLargehuge]

25. If I wasn't already married I'd certainly give you a go

:)

here's another to cheer you

[VelmaD]

27. *sigh*

That Mrs. McLargehuge is one lucky gal. :)

[YellowRubberDuckie]

15. Lane Bryant has as sale area where you can usually find tops...

For not a lot. I even got a $70 skirt there once for 12.99. You just have to go hunt. Good luck. Don't give up.
Duckie

[VelmaD]

17. I have, thankfully...

not been able to shop at Lane Bryant for about a year now. I went from a size 24 to an 8. :)

[YellowRubberDuckie]

41. Wow...congrats. Wish I had that kind of motivation.

That's fabulous...Then I suggest THe Limited, who owns Lane Bryant, and I believe also has a sale rack. And also do you have a Cato's there? They have a lot of well priced items that are more professional. Oh and Kohl's Rocks.
Duckie

[Susang]

19. Do you have an H & M near you?

They are a European chain that are very inexpensive, but quite fashionable and they carry a full range of sizes. I shop there often.

Here's their website, I think you can find out if they have a store in your area there. They don't offer internet shopping unfortunately. Don't be put off by the skinny models, they do have all sizes. I've been all over the weight spectrum recently and they've been my fashion savior.

http://www.hm.com

[TheWizardOfMudd]

20. I take it these events aren't formal

Have you checked out Harley-Davidson clothes? Most are very high quality. But you would need a good sized Harley store near you to get them.

[VelmaD]

21. not formal but not casual either...

mostly it's parties at the State convention and a meet and greet on Sunday where I'm gonna try to convince people to vote for me as a national delegate.

That awful in between that it's so hard to dress for.

[TheWizardOfMudd]

22. Try this

A solid colored T-shirt, but wear a black, casual men's suit style jacket over it with jeans and casual loafers.

Edit: And pull the jacket sleeves up just below the elbows.

[IconoclastIlene]

24. Most women over 35 look despicable in pants, shorts, etc.

If women would start wearing dresses for which they usually look a hell of a lot better in, except those suffering from anorexia, plenty of clothing can be found. No sound or sane woman over 35 looks good in pants and tops that a 17 year old looks really great in.

I wear summery skirts and dresses when it is warm and tights and longer length dresses when it is cold. I am 5 foot 7 and weigh approx. 160 pounds. I look much better in skirts and dresses than pants except maybe jeans, and that was back when I was under 30.

Just don't make yourself a slave to fashion, buying the same old jeans and T's that look good on girls before they hit thirty and aren't the thinnest things on the block. Even thin women, I think look, lousy ina ghastly type of anorexic way when their pants hang off of them and they lack a decent basic shape anyway. I wear a size 12-14 and am comfortable with myself.

I like to wear shoes that are feminine, I dont like butch style hair cuts; I have long hair, dress in a feminine way but tailored way and wear a little make up, not enough to to try to make myself look twenty either.

There is something to be said for being well groomed and styled properly no matter what age or shape you happen to be.

Be true to yourself and not a slave to fashion and you will find happiness.

[VelmaD]

26. If that works for you that's great...

I personally don't like wearing dresses. But that's me.

I honestly do know how to dress myself. I just haven't seen anything I like that works for me.

[angee_is_mad]

28. if you are hourglass

the blk pencil skirt with a shirt nipped at the waist with heels would be great!

[VelmaD]

29. Yes it would...

the problem is I shopped all night for shirts and didn't see anything that would work.

[fortyfeetunder]

31. Maybe Eileen Fisher

www.eileenfisher.com

[Ellen Forradalom]

38. I second Eileen Fisher

Real clothes for real women. She rocks.

[angee_is_mad]

33. Try alight.com

or Ashley Stewart. Both of these sites tend to have fashion forward clothing for voluptuous figures at reasonable prices.

[ikojo]

43. I don't like to wear dresses.....My preferred outfit is

a pair of pants and a polo shirt. It's not very femmy but it's what I like.

For footwear I prefer Birks or other comfortable sandals.

What's a woman to do when she doesn't like frills and stuff?

[supernova]

44. Thanks for the insult

from a 42 year old who looks fantastic in pants. Ever hear of a business suit? Ever hear of tailoring?

Most dresses either look like something a teenager would wear or my grandmother would wear. Neither is acceptable to who I am.

[SmokingJacket]

48. I turned 36 this year: guess it's goodbye pants!!

NOT!

I like my clothes to be utile: comfortable and sturdy. I like to garden and ride a bike.

Hate to think I look despicable while I live my life minding my own business.

But if so... oh well! I got better things to worry about.

(PS to OP: Look for Flax and Angelheart clothes from Jean Engleheart. Like J. Jill -- slightly cheaper (I think))

[buddhamama]

37. Hey Velma,

Don't give up.

I don't know how you feel about second hand stores? When i need something semi-formal not quite casual in a hurry i go to a funky little second hand store nearby. The styles run from the `70-late`80s. There's variety, in the material department especially.
I am with you all the way on the availability of material/styles of clothes today. Everything is the same, just different colors.

I was in your shoes a few weeks back. i, too, had to attend my state's DEM convention and everything i had was either too much or not enough. In a matter of twenty minutes i had exactly what i was lookin' for.

If you have some place like that in your area i'd bet you could find something. And, unlike Salvation Army or Goodwill, the waaayyy-back shops are more like specialty consignment shops so the clothes are in good to excellent condition.

Good Luck!!!
and Congrats again on the weight loss. :toast: :loveya: :toast:

[bearfan454]

30. Don't give up.

There has to be something you like somewhere Velma.

[VelmaD]

32. If I keep looking long enough...

the season will change and they'll put out completely different clothes. :-)

[rucky]

34. Here's a message board you must visit

www.makeupalley.com

that's my wife's equivelant of DU. The girls are really nice & all retail geeks. I guarantee within minutes you'll get a lead on what you're looking for (even if you don't know what it is yet).

[BrotherBuzz]

35. Cheer up,

Here's yet another store- there are three in your area (I peeked at your profile!) On this page are some of their shirts:

http://www.chicos.com/store/products.asp?n=sb&SCatID=9

My 53-year-old sister-in-law gave me a nice sweater from Chico's for Christmas, and her 26-year-old daughter couldn't believe I hadn't been to one of their stores; she loves their stuff, too.

Do you have a Ross or Marshall's near you? If you don't mind looking through the racks for a while sometimes the bargains make it worthwhile. Good luck!

[BrotherBuzz]

36. OOOOPs! I am NOT BrotherBuzz!

I am his wife, and I got so busy surfing the web that when I got back to DU I forgot to switch to my screen name... my husband is not a cross dresser! ;)

p.s. Sister-in-law, niece, and I also like J.Jill's clothes.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

39. Check out this site:

http://www.coldwatercreek.com

Their regular-price stuff is fairly pricey; but the outlet is terrific!

[bratcatinok]

51. I like Coldwater Creek too.

I think they do better at having good winter clothing than they do summer clothing though.

They do have some cute stuff for summer though but since I never have to dress up for anything I stick to jeans/shorts and t-shirts.

Oh dear! Did I just break a fashion dictum since I'm 51, female and I wear jeans/shorts? Oh well!

[latebloomer]

40. I like to go to the more expensive chain stores

like Lord and Taylor, Saks Fifth Avenue, and look for stuff on sale. MUCH better quality and fit. Was looking for a dress to wear to my high school reunion and the cheaper places like Annie Sez didn't have shit. Found a really nice and flattering dress in Lord and Taylor's, marked way down.

Not sure about your shirt problem, tho-- haven't really looked for tops this year.

[greatauntoftriplets]

42. Agreed re Lord & Taylor.

I like their Kate Hill line. For someone who is 5' 10" tall, finding pants long enough is not easy. Kate Hill fits me like a dream, love their linen summer stuff and I buy it marked down.

[supernova]

45. I like the better stores too

since I'm petite, I really have to be careful to get the petite-sized things that fit me better.

[VelmaD]

46. Thanks everybody for all the suggestions...

I'm headed out in a little bit to try again and will be hitting several of the stores y'all mentioned.

*big smooches for everyone*

[XNASA]

47. Texas Summer Fashion

I remember trying to be fashionable in Texas in the Summer. It's nearly impossible. Everything is made out of t-shirt material because otherwise you'd perish from a heat stroke.


Good Luck, but I'd like to recommend the sundress look. Ya can't go wrong there.

[VelmaD]

49. Well, I survived another shopping trip...

J.Jill wasn't quite funky enough for my taste but there were some other stores nearby and I actually found some shirts and I'm feeling much better now. :)

[GOPisEvil]

50. Excellent!

I thought we were going to have to make a side trip The Galleria. :-)

[VelmaD]

52. You're just happy...

'cause you aren't gonna have to listen to me whine about it in the car for 3 hours. :)

The Galleria. :scared:

[GOPisEvil]

53. Speakling of that, I need to get outta Mike's house.

See ya at 2! :hi: