Do flamboyant Christians use religion as an excuse for boorish behavior?

[The Backlash Cometh]

Has anyone noticed this among their fundie or borderline fundie relatives? Let me first qualify, that I do consider myself a Christian, but it's a quiet communion. I certainly don't push my religious opinions on others unless they pummel me with theirs. There are, however, one or two relatives I have to deal with, who weld their religion like a self-righteous mallet. It seems to justify every opinion they have. Because they are Christians, they assume that their views are sanctioned by God.

These people are also the most hateful, bigoted in my family. Just a small inventory of the things that come out of their mouth: My children look more like me, than they do look like their father. So one of the fundies on his side of the family started asking probing questions about where my son gets his height. He knows everyone in my family is on the short side and I just assumed that my son was getting his height from his father's side. Yet, it's obvious the fundie isn't buying it. I've been a (reluctant) part of this family for almost 20 years, and now their hatred is being directed at the legitimacy of my children!

The real fundie in the family had the balls to call my daughter fat (My daughter had a blocky German build as a child, but she's grown into a well-shaped jock) and questioned whether my son was capable of taking higher level courses (He's getting college credit in high school). I get bombarded with these little snippy comments everytime I visit. It's like they look for qualities that justify their stereotypes and can't accept qualities that contradict them.

So I've finally concluded that these people call themselves Christians because they assume it provides some kind of immunity to boorish behavior.

[Branjor]

1. Sounds like

you're right on the mark in your assessment.

[ablbodyed]

2. Too true, but....

just be glad that it stops at snippy comments. What does your husband think? Perhaps if it gets too bad, you'll have to tell them to crawl back under their rocks.

[The Backlash Cometh]

6. My husband is a prince among men.

He keeps the family contacts to a minimum. He generally attends his family's out-of-state weddings & funerals without me. I only have to tolerate them about 3-4 hours during one holiday a year. We had to cut back because I suffered depression and low self-esteem from having to deal with it for so many years. I thought it was my job to "get along." But, it was pointless. They will never change. I grew more confident and adjusted when I didn't have to interact with them.

[pagerbear]

14. It's good you keep contact to a minimum

I'd avoid it altogether.

[Aunt Anti-bush]

3. My brother and sister in law were like this for years.

I was constantly being preached to, but in such a way to make me feel like I was not "one with God" the way they both were. Turned out that they were pretty screwed up and putting on an act for 20 years, though. They separated and both went on with other partners, broke up a home of 4 children. When I asked my brother what God would think of him breaking up his happy home, he told me that God would approve because when the two of them got married they smoked some weed.

Then, stories start coming out from the both of them. Neither was a perfect angel of God, but both for years criticized me for not going to church, listening to 'rock and roll', etc. Finally, they have both become pretty humbled, but it took a LONG time.

[The Backlash Cometh]

7. Hmmm...maybe all the proselytizing they do is just your basic

defense mechanism called projectionism?

[no_hypocrisy]

4. Just another form of social Darwinism. If they can't be superior to you

with money, a big house, a big foreign car, and lots of vacations, then they'll tell you that you are worthless because God does not recognize you (and they're going to Heaven, and you aren't).

I'm getting really tired of the ways people find to divide themselves into rigid groups. If I preferred this, I would go to the Balkans.

[sus]

5. spot on. too many people think of church as their country club.

[fudge stripe cookays]

8. I've been trying to think of something...

to say that would completely deflate people like this. I tend to just lash out, sometimes with profanity, and I want to get better at making them cringe in embarrassment and look at themselves for a moment.

My new mantra is going to be (in a very snippy voice of course), "What a hateful thing to say. If that's what Christianity is now promoting, then I'm glad I'm agnostic. 'Judge not that ye shall not be judged, huh?"

and I'll leave it at that.

FSC

[The Backlash Cometh]

11. When the time is right, I'm sure the words will come.

The older I get, the more subdued I become. I will be calm when the right words come.

[Leprechan29]

9. As far as your son is concerned

(And this could be from personal experience, but I'm not quite sure) If he has heard what they say and is as intelligent as it sounds, then he should be having quite a bit of fun listening to the relatives. It always strikes me as comical when people underestimate intelligence, and it might amuse your son more than it annoys him. How does he feel about the comments?

[The Backlash Cometh]

10. He didn't hear the comment regarding his height.

But I did tell both children about the comments made by Auntie Fundie in regard to my daughter's weight and my son's intelligence. I believe that's when my husband began to cut down on the family get-togethers. He doesn't even take the kids to see them when they're only a half hour away. The ironic thing is that they, (his relatives) are the ones that are sensing the loss. My kids and I couldn't care less. They live full lives. They enjoy seeing their cousins once a year, but there's such an age gap that a few hours a year is all they need.

[Leprechan29]

12. I know the feeling

Keep on, keeping on...

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

13. Pssssst! They're undercover operatives of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy!

We plant them to make religion look bad and draw people to the Dark Side! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! :evilgrin:

[Bertha Venation]

15. Oh, HELL yes! (pun intended) Some do. I sure did.

I was among the worst.

Fortunately for the world, I outgrew it.

[The Backlash Cometh]

16. I wish you'd start a thread and explain exactly what you were thinking.

Now that we're on the subject, I can see the potential for manipulation.

[Maat-hotep]

17. Sometimes

I get the feeling that fundies are of the opinion that good and decent behavior is somehow wasted on unbelievers. In their worldview, the nicest thing you can do for someone is to "bring them to Christ," so anything, anything you do to them is automatically excused if it's done with the intent of converting them. I can totally see these geniuses torturing people, hell, maybe even murdering them, and still thinking of themselves as decent, righteous, Godly people.

I mean so what if you kill someone, so long as you've saved their soul?

[The Backlash Cometh]

18. Welcome Maat-hotep

And thanks for the comments. Yes, I do believe that there's some dehumanizing taking place. What I don't understand is how we let it happen without calling their hand. They seemed to have disarmed the left's moral ground with Clinton's error of judgment; yet, their side has a whole list of right-wingers who were transgressors and who are simply washed clean with redemption and quietly dismissed to the shadows of history.

[GreenPartyVoter]

19. I know many conservative Christians who would never

treat you or your kids this way. :(

However, I have often noticed that dysfunctional people are drawn to the stricter variations of faith, whatever that faith may be. Obviously this is the case in your own family.

Would Jesus love a liberal? You bet!
http://www.geocities.com/greenpartyvoter/liberalchristians.htm

[sam sarrha]

20. When you are Gods chosen person.. that gives you can do nothing wrong..

what a rush...!!

Just like Bush.. they tell him he needs to change his approach in Iraq, but God has told him to do this Gods way so he cant change the goals... but what really happened was his cocaine fried and alcohol pickled brain was just mumbling to itself.. but he think he is on a mission from god. ..so when this falls apart there could be real trouble.. because he will 'externalize' the reason and punish the offenders of gods will.:tinfoilhat: