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Hey Ladies - Now's your chance to bag Rush Limbaugh

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Jabbery Donating Member (238 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:12 AM
Original message
Hey Ladies - Now's your chance to bag Rush Limbaugh
That's right, Ladies - just imagine, he's rich, he lives in a $24 million mansion, and he's available.

Yes, Ladies, just imagine Rush coming home to you wearing those sexy 46-inch waist Sansabelts with his large, quivering breasts protruding from underneath his golf shirt...as you lay down on the $20,000 couch to make love, his overwhelming cigar stank breath envelops you with stinky love...his thinning hair implants and body odor give way to the foulest stench imaginable when he slides his loafers off and those black socks won't come off because they're stuck to those sexy, fungus-ravaged feet...

Okay, sorry, I know it's gross, but you gotta admit, any woman who does hook up with Limbaugh deserves the disgusting stuff she gets...I don't care how much money he has...
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molly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:14 AM
Response to Original message
1. Considering all the drugs he's taken
I doubt that sex is an option.
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:15 AM
Response to Original message
2. Added bonus for the ladies!
I'll bet that he doesn't get nearly as sweaty an out of breath as he used to, while he's huffing and puffing on top of you. Although, the drugs have probably made him impotent anyhow.

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Cannikin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:17 AM
Response to Original message
3. 'bag' as in 'hunt and kill'?
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readmylips Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:19 AM
Response to Original message
4. Me...me....me....
I want to see the fat butt, marry the pig...and I'll give the pig's money to support liberal causes...that would really make the pig cry.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:23 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. Write a big ol' check to the ACLU for defending him
HA! The irony!!
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:21 AM
Response to Original message
5. I bet he's into scat and cleveland steamers
delivered onto HIM by his lady friends or his barely-legal teen boys.
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daa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 08:43 AM
Response to Original message
7. or GUYS hey Drudge here is your chance. nt
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noonwitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 09:27 AM
Response to Original message
8. On the up side...
1. He doesn't live with his mother.
2. He's gainfully employed.
3. He has a housekeeper.
4. With all the drugs he's abused, sex may not be an option-this is a selling point!
5. No kids to share all the loot with once he's gone.

The trick if for the prospective bride to be in control of his drug intake, so an experienced codependent is needed.
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geniph Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
9. Nah, his mounted head would look funny in my living room
really doesn't match the decor. Plus, I'm not sure a 20-gauge is sufficient to bring down prey of that size. He might take a .30-.30, or maybe a .50 caliber elephant gun.

...whaddyou mean, that's not what you meant by "bag"? Who'd want to do anything else with that pustulent old gasbag???
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AwakeAtLast Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Jun-21-04 04:50 PM
Response to Original message
10. Excuse me.......
:puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke: :puke:
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