So M-jean, how has your first week of Lesbianism gone?

[LynneSin]

as you all know, it was about a week ago that m-jean03 came out. With a new toaster in hand, let's find out how her first week went

:loveya:

[Gothic Sponge]

1. You get a free toaster when you "come out?"

Is it some kind of lesbian bank? ;)

[m-jean03]

2. Jeezus...A whole thread just for me!!

Lynnesin, you are trying to embarass me!! :pals: :loveya:

You're so silly. Now I'm blushing. Damn it. :grr:

[LynneSin]

4. It was such an exciting moment - we all want details

You got like 200 replies to that thread (and another 80 for my dumb post trying to figure out what the heck was up with the damn toaster).

:hugs:

[m-jean03]

6. Oh, nothing too big

I feel like I should invent some salacious story just because of this post, though!

But I won't.O8)

Let me tell you, I am dying to use my favorite Mel Gibson pick up lines from Lethal Weapon though. Just dying to. . .

[Westegg]

23. Not just a thread, darlin'---we're starting a whole site!...

Keep an eye out for that.

Good to hear your "voice." I've been missing you. Big, handsome, strapping heterosexual male that I am, I assume this means little to you now but still....I've missed you. I was going to write a fictional version of your first week as a lesbian, and I may still do! But just at the the moment, I haven't the time.

Let me at least set the scene for you: M-Jean is drinking herbal tea and watching "The Gilmore Girls"---as per usual---and she gets a splinter in her cute l'il hand. She's got one of those thrift-shop coffee tables where the varnish has worn off? Anyway, she grabs treezers from the bathroom and attempts to extricate said splinter. She gets half of it, but the damn thing breaks off, under her skin. Not just annoying---this is downright painful! M-Jean ventures out then, into the cold dark night, heading for the 24-hour pharmacy at the end of her block. (Need I mention that it's raining? And M-Jean is wearing only a thin white cotton t-shirt?) The pharmacy is empty. But---thank goodness!---there's someone behind the prescription counter. A young woman dressed in a nurse's uniform. She is not unattractive. Indeed, upon closer insection, M-Jean realizes that this lass is quite the looker. My gosh, she can't be more than 20! Blonde hair---you can tell she's a real blonde--tied up in a neat, efficient nurse's bun. "Can I help you?" the young nurse asks, as pleasant as can be. M-Jean's mind is racing, and so is her pulse---she can feel her cheeks flushing bright red. "Yes. I-I hope so.Maybe you can..." And she holds her injured paw out to the night nurse....

More later.

[m-jean03]

25. BWAHAHAHAHAHHHHA!!!!!

:loveya: :loveya: I can't wait for the update. However... The Gilmore Girls? Never watched it. Herbal tea? Prefer the green or black stuff. But otherwise, man, you've got me figured out!! :D

ROFL. I missed you too. :pals:

[Westegg]

37. Never watched "Gilmore Girls"? Well, maybe it ain't your cuppa...

...speaking of tea, sorry I botched that one. I forgot about your caffeine jones.

Anyway, as long as you keep them smiley faces coming my way---even once in a while---then I remain a happy man. Seriously. These are some dark times for me but you have brightened some of my glummer days. Because I know you're a cool person and I'm better for being able to communicate with you.

But now I need to say this as well: What I just wrote was fairly selfish, and passive-aggressive. And basically bullshit. Suggesting that you are somehow responsible for my happiness. That's unfair of me. I dig what we've shared, m-jean03, and I look forward to chatting with you in the future---but I, and only I, am responsible for my state of mind. In other words, no pressure, hon.

And I'd like to thank DU for allowing me to self-analyze and muddy the waters of this great site with my narcissistic ramblings...

[GOPisEvil]

30. Uhhhh...I'll be back in 9-12 minutes.

:P

[Westegg]

35. Hold yer water, soldier. I gotta work UP to the big pay-off...

...Should take a day or two. Known as a cliff-hanger, son.

As you were...

[tom_paine]

42. Damn, dude! That was terrific

Where's the "Stiffler" Smiley when you need it?

Actually, the "Stifller's Mom" Smiley would be more appropriate here...

"Oh, Gloria! Gloria! Oh!"

"Call me 'Stiffler's Mom'"

Did you find Stiffler's Mom attractive, m-jean03?

I sure did.

:evilgrin:

[m-jean03]

46. Stiffler's Mom

is pretty damn hot, in some bizarre way, tom_paine. :D

[tom_paine]

49. Isn't she, though? She's one of those people who's sex appeal

outweighs their actual attractiveness.

And she's pretty ok to start (or was, that's an old picture)

[pagerbear]

3. Ah, how well I remember those heady days!

My first queer week was amazing!

[m-jean03]

What happened?

Mine's been pretty low-key, but I guess I'm noticeably a happier person. Everyone tells me that I seem happier now, anyway. :-)

[Misunderestimator]

5. Come to think of it... they were heady days...

now you've got me thinking about all the idiotic things I did.... :)

On edit... they were wonderful, idiotic things. Whenever that kind of headiness comes your way, you should just revel in it.

[m-jean03]

8. I need to know the rules for checking out girls--

I mean, what is acceptable and what is just rude? :shrug:

[Misunderestimator]

9. No big secret really...

and nothing wrong with going overboard... it's who you are right now... corny as it is, just be yourself, and don't try to be something. :)

[m-jean03]

12. I'm just afraid of offending someone--

I do find myself approaching something like leering sometimes, then I'm like, jesus, girl, get a hold of yourself.

I guess there aren't any rules, just one's own good judgement, huh? :shrug:

I mean, I guess I always checked out girls before, but now I feel a lot freer and more confident in doing so, but I don't know if this is a good thing -- being a good feminist and all, I feel kind of evil! :D

[Misunderestimator]

14. It's all natural...

Really... just enjoy it. :)

[m-jean03]

19. Thanks!

OK, damn it, I will. :-)

[eyesroll]

11. There was a feature a while back in Jane magazine about picking up

women at lesbian bars. Protocol and tips and all that. I'm not sure I still have the issue, but if I do, I'd be happy to type out their advice, if you're interested. (It was a short article.)

[m-jean03]

15. Aw, it's OK, but thanks

You don't need to, I'm sure I can figure things out when I get there. :-)

I'm talking about leering at the female population in general, as in, most-likely-to-be hetero women.. . :evilgrin:

[eyesroll]

22. Well, then...speaking from my own personal experience as a woman

(and only my own experience, so your mileage may vary)

I think this is a "do unto others as you want them to do unto you" situation.

If you would be totally put off by someone pulling up to you at a bus stop, unrolling their car window and asking, "so, are you coming or what?" (as happened to me in high school by a much older guy), then don't do that. ;-)

I do have one anecdote.
The only time I was ever propositioned by a woman (well, girl), I was 16 and at creative-arts camp. I have to admit I was damn uncomfortable, but she was blunt. Just asked me flat out if I wanted to have sex with her. At the time, I thought she was joking. (I grew up in a tolerant, but sheltered, household, and I'd never met a real-life gay person before.) I pretty much stammered out a "um, no" and a nervous laugh. (I should also add that one of my male friends had, a few weeks prior, decided I was a lesbian, and being a typical insecure and not-homophobic-but-this-can't-possibly-happen-to-me teenager, this didn't help. "Maybe they're right?" OK, so 12 years later I know that A. a woman propositioning me doesn't make me a lesbian and B. not everyone's 100% straight or gay anyhow, but I didn't know either then.)

Turns out, she wasn't joking. (Although I don't know whether the bluntness was her style, or her insecurity, showing through.) But she didn't seem too hurt either.

I think, well more than a decade later, if I was asked flat-out, out of nowhere, by anyone, if I wanted to have sex with them, I'd be put off by the bluntness. Conversation first, I guess. "You want to go somewhere quiet and talk?" is a good start -- with the right body language, it unambiguously sends a "get to know you better" vibe (wrong body language and it sends an "I'm going to talk about complex tax figures" vibe), without being too pushy or presumptive.

Good luck. :-)

[m-jean03]

29. Oh...

Well, I'm super sweet, charming and subtle. Oh, and did I mention modest? :D

...And I'd never be so crass, unless I knew the lady wanted what I got. :D Thanks for the advice.

[eyesroll]

31. :-)

Yeah, "so, wanna screw?" is fine in the right context. Not so nice if you're classmates but otherwise strangers in line at the cafeteria.

But talk like you do in your "I know I know I know" post and I don't think you'll have any trouble. :D

[Guy_Montag]

20. Can I have that too...

What?:shrug:

[eyesroll]

24. I'm pretty sure "don't be a guy" was part of the protocol...

:spank:

Sorry.

[TXlib]

28. I'd like that advice!

:evilgrin:

[tom_paine]

43. Wouldn't be essentially the same as a Hetero Guy Rules for Scoping Gals??

Everyone is fair game.

Sunglasses hide your pupils and where they are looking when at the beach or with your girlfriend. Unless you hook up with a cool gal who is very secure and doesn't mind a wandering eye as long as she gets to, too.

As A Hetero Dude, this is all speculation on my part.

Welcome to the world of the Hetero Male Horndog. Anything goes!

[m-jean03]

48. Thanks tom_paine

Glad I got these cool Transitions lenses a couple years back, then. :D

[Blue-Jay]

7. So.... Have you scored yet?

Just wondering...

[m-jean03]

10. Oh, I wish. . .

:-) You guys are makin' me blush.

[LynneSin]

13. WAIT A SECOND!!!!

How do you know you're a lesbian if you haven't taken a test drive yet????!!!!!

(ok, this shows what a dumb hetero I really am :crazy: )

[Misunderestimator]

16. You know... ;)

same way you "knew" you were a heterosexual before you ever slept with a man... :bounce:

[m-jean03]

18. 'zactly

Thank you. :-)

[m-jean03]

17. I know I know I know --

I know I know I know I know. . . My hormones know. My body knows. I know in my dreams and in my waking hours. I know, because I've fallen majorly in love with girls, and I've was never physically attracted to the guys I dated in high school and college. I know, from memories of giving massages to my stoner friend from HS when she got us stoned. I know, when I stand between a guy and a girl who are both very handsomely built people, that the girl is the one whose bones I want to jump. I know when I watch any movie or TV show, it is the guy I imagine being, and the woman whose sweet soft body I imagine caressing. . .

So, does that 'splain it? :D :hi:

[Endangered Specie]

26. ...

YOu ever considered writing 'romantic' novels?

Sounds like youd be good, must be that dirty mind of yours heh.

[m-jean03]

36. Oooh, I should give it a shot.

Me and Westegg could be a team. :evilgrin:

[tom_paine]

44. Not only does that 'splain it, m-jean

I'm a gonna need the "Stiffler's Mom" icon again!

Found one!



Good luck test driving your newfound sexuality, kiddo.

Just relax and be confident and happy in yourself (which it sounds like you are). Everything will fall into place once you have that.

I know it sounds dumb, but speaking as a person who had a fucked up emotionally scerwed-up childhood, it's the truth.

[CrownPrinceBandar]

21. I think she's saving herself for SarahBelle............

and their great Argentine-Asparagus adventure!

[SarahB]

38. First rule- don't love the SarahBelle!!!

I'm a big heartbreaker (unless I've already told you I'm madly in love with you and in that case, I never, ever would do anything but treat your heart gently and as well as any other parts). :D

[CrownPrinceBandar]

39. Please treat her kindly...

Weeping sounds so mournful drifting across the Pampas. It makes the Gauchos sad.

[SarahB]

40. Oh, I would. (I hope I am.)

I like m-jean a lot. She's a sweetie. She knows I'm a strait chick though. Don't want to mess with anyone's head or anything. I've probably done enough of that in my life at times to people so I try to be careful.

[CrownPrinceBandar]

45. m-jean does seem quite the sweetie.........................

I just enjoyed that I got to participate in the the whole "Argentina" thing. I don't think anyone considered their heads messed with.

Not to get too personal, but don't beat yourself up too bad about things that happened in the past. We've all done things that could be considered suspect or shitty.

:hi:

[TXlib]

27. Link to original thread?

i missed it...

[Not Me]

32. Get yourself to a Pride event this month.

And go wild!

[m-jean03]

34. Woo hoo!

With all these folks tellin' me to go wild, I just might do that. :D Thanks.

[m-jean03]

33. In hindsight, I would have done a more interesting

job of telling the news, but here is that initial thread. Gawd, you guys are wonderful. I really didn't expect so much fanfare. :hug:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=1287551

[Brahma Bull]

41. What's with the whole toaster thing?

[NightTrain]

47. When do you get to stop wearing the paper TRAINEE hat?

:evilgrin: