Error messages we can live without

[SoCalDem]

Freeper site, but still funny


Here are a some error messages we can do without. (Tongue in cheek.)

WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger
WinErr 002: No Error - Yet
WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file
WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong
WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused
WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for broken glass
WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened
WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ?
WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of.
WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System has been destroyed.
WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault.
WinErr 01A: Operating system overwritten - Please reinstall all your software. We're so sorry.
WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to read this error.
WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code.
WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait three or four hours and try again.
WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be lost.
WinErr 042: Virus error – A dangerous virus has been detected. Good Luck!
WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed. Please click the left mouse button to continue.
WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors. Additional errors may not be displayed.
WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game?

Seriously though, computers have come a long way in the last few years.

I thought you would find it interesting if we looked back and compared today’s computer with one bought in 1995. That’s not that long ago but the difference will amaze you! A quantum leap was made that year with release of Windows 95. Back then RAM memory was selling for $50 per megabyte, and hard drives were $1 per meg. Computers sold from $3,000 to $4,000 and included a 1 gig hard drive (at the most) and 16 megs of RAM.

Today my computer has a 120 gig hard drive, 512 megs of RAM and I bought it for $1,000. This same computer in 1995 would have cost almost $150,000!

[ikojo]

1. I'm George W Bush and I am the pResident

That is ONE error message we need to correct come November 2004


Reboot needed for the US

[zbdent]

2. I have an old Radio Shack catalog from the early 80s

Maxed out, totally stoked system:

64K storage space on four 8 inch floppy disks with monochrome monitor

Eight grand. Top of the line.

Don't know if it's true or not, but there used to be a quote attributed to Bill Gates: "I don't see why anybody would use more than 64K of RAM."

[Styles]

5. Sounds like an inventory of some of my old junkers

Had an old pile of junkers a while back that I had to toss, including a PET 8032, and a big ol' SCSI reel to reel tape drive that stored a whooping 180 Megs...

Cut my teeth on an old C=128 and an (original) Amiga 1000. Neither were bad machines either. Still got an old Radio Shack Pocket Computer, which, if you could imagine, was basically a calculator sized device that ran BASIC. Still kinda neat.

In some ways computers have came a long way, but as they become faster and better, we find it alot easier to waste their performance to do rather trivial things (for example, the amount of performance required to drag a solid window around using windows XP, on a 1 GHz processor is about equal in processing power to a Pentium 133)

But Bill Gate's quote was about 640KB of memory, which referred to the old IBM-compatible DOS limits... and he was wrong even when he said it, as there were (larger) computers in 1980 that did have 2 megs and were stressed for an upgrade.

[DieboldMustDie]

7. I think that was 640K...

which was the most MSDOS could handle 20 or so years ago.

[zbdent]

3. Error code 666 - Bush gets re-selected

already installed in Diebold, coming to an automated voting machine near you!

[LoneStarLiberal]

4. The Lawyer Wizard

Congratulations on downloading your new MP3 files!

Windows XP will now open the Lawyer Wizard for your convenience.

Would you like to:
A) Select a local lawyer from the MS Lawyer list provided in this wizard?

B) Select another lawyer not listed here but that Windows XP can email for you at this time?

C) Forego all the legal wrangling and have Windows XP contact your local police directly while you place your hands on the monitor and await their arrival.

Thank you for using Windows XP!

[DrWeird]

6. When I was a kid, I was afraid of the computer.

I kept breaking the Syntax.