OK, I'm casting the DU soap opera; who wants to be the town slut?

[Bossy Monkey]

Everybody should propose a character for yourself and a character name. White trash porno-style names (Kayla, Shayla, Flayla) are always preferred. Let's see how far we can go with this.

[ablbodyed]

1. MEMEMEMEMEME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My name is smegmella

[punpirate]

2. Don't know about town floozies...

... but don't forget to have Dubya do a Peter Sellers' routine as mayor, town drunk and the village idiot....

[bitchkitty]

3. I want to be the eccentric!

The one who lives by herself and all the kids are afraid of her because they think (rightly so) that she's a witch?

Failing that, I can be the hard-bitten old broad with bleached out hair who hangs at the bar picking up sailors?

[dofus]

8. You can't be both! I want to be

one of those!

[bitchkitty]

105. OK, how about this -

we're both barflies, with a history. A long time ago my husband had a fatal heart attack while he was jumping your bones, and I've never forgiven you for it. You hate me too, we were rivals in high school and I ran over your cat. On purpose! Whenever we're both in the bar, the guys lay bets on who will flash her tits first. Sound good to you?

[ablbodyed]

14. Sailors,

THEY'RE MINE, no heteros allowed to corrupt swabbies.

[Rowdyboy]

4. Amanda Reckonwith...

transvestite hooker with a heart of gold who gets murdered...maybe?

[bitchkitty]

7. Not murdered, kidnapped!

Or she wanders into town, with amnesia, and turns out to be the mayor's long-lost son!

[blondeatlast]

53. You're up against Anne Coulter!

Great name!

[philosophie_en_rose]

5. I'll be the town librarian.

Studious and calm during the day - smoldering temptress at night.

;)

[blondeatlast]

15. You'll have to beat me in the auditions--

and I have the research behind me!

[philosophie_en_rose]

22. You can be the librarian, then.

I'll be the former double agent who is, for mysterious reasons, hanging out in a tawdry little town like this one.

[blondeatlast]

24. Actually, I've decided to audition for a different part, see #23.

[SpiralHawk]

32. I'm look for a copy of the Kama Sutra, Rose.

Could you help me find it back in the stacks?

[SpiralHawk]

33. I'm look for a copy of the Kama Sutra, Rose.

Could you help me find it, I think it's way back in the stacks?


- Swarthy Town Journalist
(knows maybe half the dirt about everybody).

[philosophie_en_rose]

35. That one is in my personal collection.

:D

[hippiechick]

6. Erica Kane wannabe checking in !!!

ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease ?!?!?

The 'tough as nails' 'business' woman whose personal life takes her to all corners of the world, and who has hordes of adoring men at her beck and call ??


:hippie:

[DemOverseas]

9. Too old to be the slut

:(...how about the slut's mom??? I want the name Sheila!

[wyldwolf]

11. "Stella" sounds more like a slut's mom!

[DemOverseas]

18. I'l bite with Stella.....

proxy high haired blond with tight capri pants. Cigarette with an inch of ash hanging on the tip. Sitting at the bar knowing I'll be going home alone when the lights come up. That guy playing the drums with the paint brushes is looking pretty good.

[dofus]

17. Hey!

That's MY real name.

Sheila, mother of sluts, naah. In real life I'm Sheila, mother of two computer geeks!

[greatauntoftriplets]

30. HEY! That is already my name!!!

You can't have it.

On edit: But dofus can have it since she already has it already. LOL.

[JohnKleeb]

10. lol

I dont know.

[blondeatlast]

19. Kevin Bacon started on the "Guiding Light" as a teen.

Ordinary teen with very mixed up family life, saved only by his true love, if I remember correctly. I think that's a pretty standard role.

Let's call you: Hunter Solomon (you're so wise beyond your years). No sex, though, guy--sorry!

[JohnKleeb]

21. no sex

no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wouldnt know I dont watch soaps, but whos the lucky girl :)

[blondeatlast]

25. Hmmm, give me a while . . .

I don't know, maybe the youbngsters are indulging now, but when I watched soaps it was a big no-no. Why kids were the only ones NOT having sex, I have no idea!

Edit: See post 23, I have cast myself as your mom!

[JohnKleeb]

27. I see that

[LynneSin]

12. Khephra has already slept with more folks from DU

Me, Ramsey, RBNYC and WillPitt....

That pretty much qualifies him as the DU slut.

(ps - we love you Kheph :hug: )

[blondeatlast]

20. Eyebrows beyond the hairline! Ahem . . .

[wyldwolf]

13. The misunderstood illigitmate son of the town millionaire...

...I don't know I'm his son, but he kinda looks out for me.

Call me... Thorne.

[JohnKleeb]

16. sounds good

I guess I can be Ivan the always drunk on vodka foriegn exchange student at the local university. Now let me work on my Russian accent. *clears throat*

[blondeatlast]

28. How about Thorne N. Butte?

Couldn't resist!

[blondeatlast]

23. Long-suffering wife of the town's plastic surgeon, who is about to embark

on a torrid affair with the teen apprentice carpenter.

Me: Celexa (get it?) Solomon (Kleeb's mother)

Apprentice: Holt Hammer (edit) building a "panic room" for protection from disturbed ex-lover (awaiting casting)

[JohnKleeb]

26. huh? since when I am an apprentice carpenter

[philosophie_en_rose]

31. Not you. One of your equally fantastic friends.

She's playing your mom.

[JohnKleeb]

34. oh ok whatever I confused

:)

[liberalitch]

29. always the wallflower never the slut

I have always lived vicariously through my "hoe" friends....

But I love being in love (that causes monogamy)

WE ALL have at least ONE "hoe" friend... male or female.

[Kamika]

36. can i be the paranoid sadistic smalltown cop?

pleasepleaseplease.

Not sure of the name. Maybe Rose or something

[blondeatlast]

52. How about Damitra? It kinda sounds like the character.

[Kamika]

57. hmm

Doesnt sound too smalltownish

Thanks for the tip though

[ForrestGump]

37. I wanna be the shirtless pool guy

"Ashley, I'm here to fix your pump."

[JohnKleeb]

38. sounds like the role for you

:thumbsup: you gonna have a beer belly and a southern accent :shrug:

[ForrestGump]

41. There you go

I'll break the stereotypical mold of shirtless pool guys. A keg instead of a six-pack abdomen. Maybe black out some teeth, too. And a back wig. :D

[blondeatlast]

42. Casting is open for Holt Hammer, the hunky teen apprentice

carpenter, building a panic room for Cele (ah well, see post #23).

You always have to tie the characters together.

Figuratively, you perv! :evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

43. well if you are looking for a teen lol

I am gonna volunteer leftistrebel. lol
I hope he doesnt mind that.

[blondeatlast]

46. Done! Didn't think of him . . .

Love,
Mom :evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

48. lol mom lol

You're gonna have to ask him but I will ask him for you lol. Thats funny "mom" because another DUer calls me son lol and mom lol. hehe :) thas weird. ok whos dad?

[blondeatlast]

58. I don't want to think about it right now, it's too early (9am in AZ)!

[JohnKleeb]

93. heh umm so have you decided on my love interest

the chemistry student and the school girl are in love and I am left behind
:cry: :cry:

[leftist_rebel1569]

49. LOL...I would HAPPILY take that...

:evilgrin:

thanks Kleeb!

[JohnKleeb]

51. wow youre a quick one

:)
whats up sleepy head just waking up? Ive been up since 8:30!
Like do you have like a cam where you just know what is up

[leftist_rebel1569]

54. no....but, I seriously seem to have a sense

for such things. Just ask my friends, I ALWAYS show up when something happens....

[JohnKleeb]

56. *sniff* yeah

It would be great if you could show up for that rally in DC.

[oneighty]

39. I will be

The old and toothless wrinkled up town/village lecher.

Oh! Wait! I already have that part.

Just call me Pan!

180

[JitterbugPerfume]

44. If you are Pan

Who will be Chink, the hermit?


I want to be Sissy , the hitch hiking Ho with spectacular thumbs

[KG]

40. Dr. GoodBone - at your, uh, service.

ready for your physical examination? :evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

45. Can I have a part?

I don't want to be the town slut though... I thought that was matcom's job!

[JohnKleeb]

47. sure they got me one

did you stop getting those weird AIMs btw?

[blondeatlast]

50. How bout you as the perpetually dying and returning evil,

incredibly handsome, devious businessman who only lives to wreck everyone's lives? (Roger on the Guiding Light--the actor finally really died so he can't return anymore).

I see Matcom as the psychotic ex-lover of Celexa (see #23) for protection from whom the panic room is being built.

[JohnKleeb]

ummm blonde I mean mom

Shes a girl I dont think she wants to be a business man and handsome. lol blondes :)

[blondeatlast]

62. Oops--sorry LPFF! The sad thing is I knew that . . .

[JohnKleeb]

64. heh you did

*shaking head* lol
moran!

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

68. It's ok

I just don't understand why everyone thinks I'm a guy. :)

[JohnKleeb]

69. I dont know how people have gotten that

Although I concede your sn is gender netural so :shrug:

[leftist_rebel1569]

60. well,

you could always be the seemingly innocent teen girl having an affair with me at the same time i'm having an affair with someone else...:evilgrin:

[blondeatlast]

63. You think like a soap writer--I like it!

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

65. Oh...

Would you like to come over afterschool to "study" with me? ;-)

[JohnKleeb]

70. *butting in* the younger guys huh

lol
wanna study

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

73. It's ok

For the soap opera age doesn't matter :evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

74. heh I know

I thought I got a love interest, :shrug: whos it gonna be?

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

80. what about breezy?

:)

[JohnKleeb]

83. lol shes like two grades younger

heh.
I dunno even know what she looks like :shrug:
you two doing your experimenting
I am going to the bookstore and or library. I am gonna get read and quoted from so ha!

[Breezy du Nord]

123. Oh gee, just totally dis me Kleeb!

:P

Too young...

[JohnKleeb]

128. take no offense

Its just odd :shrug:
lol
yeah but you know
:shrug:
heh its ok

[leftist_rebel1569]

71. hmm....maybe...

is it for that human anatomy class again? ;-)

but, I have some...uh..."work" to do later, too...

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

72. Yes...

and maybe later we can work on some of our "chemistry" together ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

75. oooh....

you know how much I like "chemistry" class...

but this time, I want to be the "teacher"....:evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

76. sickos lol

How about you let her do an experiment on you?
:evilgrin:
or you can mix chemicals
:evilgrin:


*Kleeb thinking seriously* damnit I need a girl to that shit on me. :cry: :cry: :cry:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

79. He can experiment on me

;-)

[JohnKleeb]

81. ha

Well maybe I can find some girl to read me in the library so ha!

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

77. So does that mean...

I'm the teacher's pet? :evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

78. I guess so

[leftist_rebel1569]

82. yup...

and I have a special little treat for my favorite students...;-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

84. Oh really?

And what would that be? ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

86. well...

you'll see. Just wait 'til after school, ok? :evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

88. Oh I can't wait!

After school time... :evilgrin:

[leftist_rebel1569]

89. I can't wait either....

maybe we should skip school...you know, more "study" time...:evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

90. Even if we skip school...

I still get an A+ in your classes. ;)

[leftist_rebel1569]

92. yup...

and maybe you can try for some "extra credit" later...:evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

96. Absolutely

"Sucking up" to the teacher always works ;-)

[leftist_rebel1569]

99. of course!

but, you're my favorite "suck-up"...you just seem to 'rub" me the right way every time...:evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

108. hehe

You know how I can just get a good hold of that #2 when I do my homework... :evilgrin:

[leftist_rebel1569]

121. lol

oh, good grip indeed...you seem to have a lot of fun with that #2. Hmm...maybe I should assign you some more homework...:evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

124. As long as I get to use the special

teacher's pencil.
:evilgrin:

[leftist_rebel1569]

127. well...

I think you're gonna have to stay after school for a little while, then you can use it ALL you want too...:evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

91. ok I dont get it

are you the teacher or student? I know shes a student. Whatever so are you gonna show her your grizzly? I always get left out :cry:
boo hoo :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

[JohnKleeb]

87. his grizzly bear?

:evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

85. ok

The chemistry labratory smells funny mommy.

[JanMichael]

55. The moody alcoholic socialist agitator who also happens to be advisor...

...to the Republican Mayor. I'm also sleeping with his wife and daughters, and, his mother...

Eventually, in the first episode, I'm shot whilst sipping absinthe, and discussing the Revolution at the local pub with the vodka swilling foreign exchange student.

[JohnKleeb]

59. sorry I already got a role

but you meant me, you can still get drunk with me. revolution!
Are you sleeping with his mother in law too?

[Cheswick2.0]

61. Amanda Sue Truely

The uptight church Choir director who gets seduced over a matter of months by the piano tuner.

They end up having thrilling little trysts all over town.

Okay go write me a story line.

[MaineDem]

66. Holly Peaceful

The 50-something guitar-playing, folk-singing, radical who lives in a cabin in the country. Rumors abound that she was a member of the SDS or even the Weather Underground. She's been seen around town dining out with the bank president presumably trying to convert him from his evil GOP ways.

I even have the guitar.

[short bus president]

67. I wanna be "Biff Spiffman"

the local bartender with a heart of gold, a keen listening ear, and a metal plate in his head from a farming accident back in his native Iowa. Oh, and I want to wear a dead parrot mounted to my right shoulder at all times, and do a bad ventriloquism kind of thing (with my lips clearly moving) to make the dead bird responsible for my metal-plate-induced bouts of Tourette's. And would it be too much trouble for the writers to get me laid now and again? Maybe that "Stella, mother of whores" would be good for me?

[Deja Q]

94. I'll be the goofy gay neighbor...

:D

But if I am to be the town slut, call my HypnoDick... :eyes:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

98. Who will be the Grace to your Will?

:D

[JohnKleeb]

95. Has the chemistry teacher been caught for his actions?

Meanwhile I am still all alone
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

[Breezy du Nord]

106. Poor John's all alone

And apparently I'm too young for him, lol.

[JohnKleeb]

125. lol youre never too young to be a friend

[ronnykmarshall]

97. If the street lamp fits ...

I'll lean against it!

[blondeatlast]

100. On review--which sluts? There are sooooo many to cast!

[Breezy du Nord]

101. I'll be the dorky good-girl who's so sheltered

she'll end up having sex with everyone, lol.

Me, I'm not slut material :P

[leftist_rebel1569]

102. hmmm....

ANOTHER person I can have a affair with! :P

[Breezy du Nord]

103. Ywah, and i'll wear those dorky glasses

You know, the square black ones that the pretty-ugly girl in teen movies always wears.

Hunky teen apprentice, huh? :P

[leftist_rebel1569]

104. yup....

and having an affair with a middle-aged woman that i'm working for, and another friend. But, I guess I have room for you, somewhere...;-)

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

107. Excuse me?

I thought I was your favorite... no more study sessions for you! *slap*

[Breezy du Nord]

109. No, you see, you dump him cuz he slpt with *gasp* your MOTHER!!

;)

[leftist_rebel1569]

112. uhh...you got it wrong...

i'm sleeping with Kleeb's mom, not hers...i'd much rather sleep with her than her mom...:evilgrin:

[Breezy du Nord]

115. See, on this soap my mom watches a dudes screws

BOTH thus creating a scandal, especially when Mom gets pregnat with SIL baby.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

119. haha

:D

[JohnKleeb]

130. Youre sleeping with my mom!

You bastard lol
BTW blonde have we found a daddy for me? Make him a raging alcoholic too.

[leftist_rebel1569]

134. You have 2 dads...

Matcom (see post #50) and me (in a weird, discreet kind of way...)

[JohnKleeb]

137. oh?

You gotta get my mom/ your lover to send me a cast list.
Youre my dad in a way. :puke:
My mom's lover is younger than me
:cry:
Mom what are you thinking
Please let there be a cute foriegn exchange student. heh. s

[leftist_rebel1569]

139. lol...your life sucks in the DU soap opera, doesn't it?

lol :P

[JohnKleeb]

140. yep

Meanwhile youre sleeping around nudge with an older woman. *childish ooos* Yeah it sucks. I need a cast last damnit. Does it even have a name?

[leftist_rebel1569]

110. no, you are my favorite....

I was just...playing around with her...it's nothing serious, really! :)

[Breezy du Nord]

113. Jerk!

:)

[leftist_rebel1569]

114. but...I like you too...

:)

[Breezy du Nord]

116. Oh, I get it you're torn

Pretty-ugly girl gets dumped in the end though. :cry:

:P

[leftist_rebel1569]

117. not exactly...

i dump you in public, but we maintain a steamy private relationship...:evilgrin:

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

118. Oh hush

I'm pretty-ugly too, but I am just better at studying.

[Breezy du Nord]

120. Wait a mintue, there can't be 2!! pretty-ugly girls

Cat fight!!

Or it'll be like in Grease, where I turn into the slutty one.

[LeftPeopleFinishFirst]

122. heh

I posted on the thread first, ;-)

[JohnKleeb]

135. catfight woohoo

I'll sell refreshments.

[leftist_rebel1569]

129. hey, you both are pretty!

now, let's calm down for a bit...

relax...

and go back to my place for some "studying"...:evilgrin:

[JohnKleeb]

132. I aint studying with you EVER

now lemme find a study buddy somewhere.

[leftist_rebel1569]

136. not you...

I was talking to Breezy and Maggie...I want THEM to "study" with me! :P

[JohnKleeb]

138. I knew that

Hey ladies wanna study with me :P
Cant have it both ways tough guy

[Breezy du Nord]

111. What's you soap opera name?

I think your first names your middle name and your street name is you last.

Or is that your porn name? I have to think.

Me, I'm Rose Garcia. That's funny, since I dont look remotely Hispanic, lol.

edit: Wait, never mind, I found it. :P

[JohnKleeb]

126. Is it my understanding thats theres gonna be a catfight

Hurry I'll get the popcorn and beer and potato chips. heh. Ok so do I get a love interest or what?

[Terwilliger]

131. Chauncey

the gardener :smoke:

Chauncey tempts the Women of "(fill-in-the-blank)" with demon weed and tight pecs. Watch, as Chauncey seduces even the men of the town, with hippie-crazed idealism and offers of sexual favors.

OH YES! He can not be stopped!

[JohnKleeb]

133. sounds like you terwill

[Fridays Child]

141. Can I be Lahasaneva Junketcock, the eccentric but...

...kindly owner of the town's only "marital aids" store?

[TrogL]

142. Unbelievable

I'm gone for a weekend and everybody's fighting for my old title of town slut. 136 separate posts and when I quickly scanned the word "catfight" was prominent.

Well, I'm back and am and will always continue to be the town slut.

Get over it.

[JohnKleeb]

143. lol I am not fighting for the title of old town slut

That damn carpenter boy stole my studying buddy. :cry:

[JohnKleeb]

144. No one loves me!

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