The Wit And Wisdom Of NBA Players

[THUNDER HANDS]

Ron Artest on his paid suspension for what the coach called "compromised the integrity of the team":

"I don't even know what it means. You have to (update) my vocabulary. I've been meaning to ask anyone, my father. I
didn't get a chance to ask anyone. I haven't looked in a dictionary yet. What does integerity mean?"


Don Nelson on Steve Nash's season:

"He's kind of like the thermos. You put hot things in it, it stays hot. You put cold things in it, it stays cold."

Ray Allen on Shawn Bradley:

"He is like that battering ram in Lord of the Rings. They are holding the fort down and then the gargoyles come in with that big tree and start knocking the door down. That's kind of how it was.
We're getting to the hole, then they stick him in the game and we're more passive. He just stands there but that's effective."

Scott Williams (Dal) on suffering a slight stomach strain, but not knowing how he did it:

"I'm 36. I could have waved the towel too aggressively for
all I know."


Shaquille O'Neal on when he'd be healthy enough to return to play:

"You put the toast in the toaster, and it ain't done until the toaster says, 'Ding.'"

Jon Barry:

"An old friend told me never to get into a fight with a pig.
You both get dirty and the pig likes it."

Brad Miller on Indiana's inconsistency:

"It's not going to be peaches and gravy all the time."


Cleveland coach John Lucas one what he wrote on the board:

"I put Phil Jackson's name up there, along with Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'Neal. I told them, 'You guys probably want Phil Jackson. I probably want these guys. What we have is each other.'"

Minnesota GM Kevin McHale on Kevin Garnett's tirade in an ESPN Magazine interview:

"Look, guys say a lot of things and I don't put too much credence
in it. Maybe they got him on a day when his milk was too warm for his Coco Puffs."


David Robinson (SA) after Clifford Robinson (Det) went 1-5 FG in a Det-SA game:

"I hate to do it, but I have to give Steve Smith some credit for
his defense. Steve did a nice job of yelling for help every time Cliff got the ball."

Scott Skiles (Pho coach), who has been practicing with his team, on the possibility of returning to play:

"My problem would not be, 'Can I play in the game?' It would be, 'Can I get up the next morning?' That's one of the reasons I stopped playing. I got tired of crawling to the breakfast table the next morning."

Dikembe Mutombo (Atl) on his technical for wagging his finger after a
block:

"I can not do the finger wave to the guy after I block a shot, I
have to do it to the crowd. I did it to the crowd, but the referee said there was a bench in front of the crowd."


Ron Mercer on Chicago:

"The majority of time, it seems to be one thing or the other."


At the news conference introducing Alvin Gentry as new coach of the LA Clippers

Question: Didn't you have any friends warning you not to take the job with the Clippers?
Gentry: They all encouraged me to take the job.
Question: You don't have any friends, do you?

Charles Barkley on teammate Cuttino Mobley:

"He's instant offense, on both ends of the floor, I might add."

Alonzo Mourning on winning the Defensive Player of the Year award:

"I thank my teammates for letting their men blow by them."

Charles Barkley (Hou) at the start of the press conference following
his career ending injury where he ruptured the quadriceps tendon in his left knee in the Phi-Hou game:

"Well guys, I guess that sex is definitely out of the question tonight."

Charles Barkley on his thoughts about retiring before the season:

"I remember sitting down with the Rockets and saying, 'Yeah. I'm going to retire.' They said, 'Well, we'll give you $9 million.' And I said, 'You got a pen on you?'"

Will Perdue on continuing Phil Jackson's handing out books to players and on the books Perdue handed out to the young Bulls:

"books with all pictures in them. That makes things a little easier. We have enough trouble learning the offense right now. We don't need these guys thinking deep inner thoughts."

Jayson Williams (NJ) on coach John Calipri and the Nets recent struggles:

"We have to get him looking like Fonzie again. He's starting to look like Mr. C."

Brian Williams when asked if Detroit could bounce back from two tough losses:

"We don't bounce anymore. We just splat."

Ref Joey Crawford calling a foul on Stokjo Vrankovic (LAC):

"Loose ball foul on whatever the hell his name is."


Reggie Miller (Ind) on his game winning shot vs Phoenix:

"It was so quiet you could hear a rat pee on cotton."

...more here... http://www.dfw.net/~patricia/nba-daily-humor

[skygazer]

1. Mmmmmmm.....

Peaches and gravy. My favorite.

[catzies]

2. Wow, that's old. Brian Williams became Bison Dele and he's dead.

Not that there was a connection between the two. :crazy:

[UL_Approved]

3. My favorite line:

Will Perdue on continuing Phil Jackson's handing out books to players and on the books Perdue handed out to the young Bulls:

"books with all pictures in them. That makes things a little easier. We have enough trouble learning the offense right now. We don't need these guys thinking deep inner thoughts."

So professional, so intelligent. Real Presidential material. Perdue 2008!

[elcondor]

4. Aw, you gotta admit

that Lucas quote was pretty adorable! ;-)
The rest . . . :wow: :wtf:

[underpants]

5. Some really funny ones but I have to give it to David Robinson

"I hate to do it, but I have to give Steve Smith some credit for
his defense. Steve did a nice job of yelling for help every time Cliff got the ball."

[Smirking_Chimp]

6. J Kidd back tonight!!!

Season starts tonight!!!

[THUNDER HANDS]

11. yeah baby

I'm putting the over/under on alley-oops to Richard Jefferson at 3 tonight.

RJ hasn't had a single alley or oop this season. Poor guy. :(

[catzies]

12. Alleys? Oops? They're still only worth two points. I hate dunking.

When they start giving style points or grading it like figure skating, then I'll care.

I love the games where they're able to exploit what the defense gives them and make easy high percentage uncontested shots or easy layups from cutters. I love watching a layup clinic! :evilgrin:

[mark414]

7. most of those aren't that bad

some are probably out of context too...

they're in the NBA to play basketball, not write books. don't be so quick to judge or criticize.

[Champ]

8. As for John Lucas's comment

LMAO :D

[redqueen]

9. heh

Barkley makes a good commentator, I tells ya.

[JAbuchan08]

10. It can't always be peaches and gravy

but then again why the hell would you want it to be?