The mother of all...Family Guy quote threads!

[Arkana]

Let the copycats commence.

MEG: "Hey Mom, Dad! Guess what I am?"
STEWIE: "Oh, the result of a midnight romp and a broken prophylactic?"

BRIAN: "Dude, you're talking to a guy who uses his tongue for toilet paper."

[THUNDER HANDS]

1. I love this one...

Stewie: "Cut my milk!"

Servant: "I can't sir, it's a liquid."

Stewie: "Blasted imbecile, freeze it then."

Servant: "Yes, sir."

Stewie (to two other servants): "You two, fight to the death!"

[Magrittes Pipe]

2. Of course a man made it, Lois.

It's a commercial, not a delicious Thanksgiving dinner.

[Jessica]

3. Love this one:

Brian: Gosh, I'd like to help you, Peter, but I've got to go out in the hall and chew on the back of my ass for about five minutes.

[mac56]

4. My two favorite Peter Griffin quotes

(Riding a circus elephant: ) "Look, Lois, the two symbols of the Republican Party! An elephant, and a fat white guy who is threatened by change!"

"The deep south? Isn't that the place where the black guys are really lazy, and all the white guys are just as lazy, but they're mad at the black guys for being so lazy?"

[Aiptasia]

5. My armpits are crying stinky tears

[dolo amber]

6. Peter:

"You may have killed her when you shoved all those dollar bills down her throat, you may have killed her when you hit her with the stool ... I don't know, I'm not a doctor. But I'll tell you what didn't kill her ... smoking!"

:D

[mac56]

7. Another from Peter to Lois:

"Now, I know you're a feminist, and I think that's adorable. But this is grown-up time and I'm the man."

[Xipe Totec]

8. You Want an Explanation? I'll Give You an Expanation!

(slap) GOD (slap) IS (slap) PISSED!

[bbernardini]

9. "IT'S GON' RAIN!!!"

Racist and offensive? Perhaps. But the absurdity of it makes me hysterical every time I hear it.

[Coventina]

10. My favorite Peter Griffen quote:

He has to take a crap really bad on a road trip, so they stop at an Indian Casino. He gets out of the car and says: "I gotta find the stink-lodge!"

I don't know why, but it always kills me.

[mdhunter]

11. The entire "I don't take advice from chickens, well not anymore" sequence

[cmf]

12. Stewie:

"I love God. He's so deliciously evil."

[furrylitldevil]

13. Jesus at Stewie's b-day party

"Watch as I turn this water...into FUNK!"